| Continued from Pant- t
the table with the problem on
the table.'' she said
In addition. Gibson has
"quick and dirtv" tips on con
flict management "One ot
them is turning accusations
into requests." she said, add
ing that more problems get
solved when a person expresses
a wish rather than an accusa
tion.
1 I II I T 1 ■ S "I I
lacquie Gibson
Gibson .ilso said that many
conflict situations can be im
proved i>v omitting the word
"but" from critical statements
"For example, a professor
might tell a student I really
like that report, but it was late
or messy.' " she said.
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"Our tendency when we re
an the receiving end of tti.it is
to disregard all the good stuff
that was said in the beginning
of the sentence, and only hear
the criticism that comes w ith
the hut.' " Gibson said, add
ing that a simple solution is to
use the word "and" instead lie
cause that reduces .1 whole lot
of emotional garbage, and it al
lows the receiving person to
hear those two things as
ecpml
However people learning
conflict management have <1 if
ficulties understanding that
their behaviors i .in he altered
Ciibson explained that wh.it
usually happens, as it would in
an arms reduction system, is
that it somebody makes a nil e
move, tlm other person is more
disposed to doing that also,
ami the conflict c an lie redtn ed
and managed
Hibson also applies conflict
management to her own prob
lems When she' was working
in Montana in 1 *IH4. she (level
oped a c hildren s sexual abuse
prevention program that was
lining considered and c ritic ized
by the local sc hool board.
In order to avoid becoming
defensive. Ciibson said she fo
cused on the board's and her
mutual interest in preventing
sexual abuse. "Once 1 un
hooked myself from the posi
lion, then we were open to lie
gotiations." she said, adding
that the school hoard ultimatelv
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"There goes Williams again trying to
win support for his Little Bang theory.
adopted her program
Mthough shi> believes cun
flii I c an lie reduced ami man
aged. Gibson said it < an not In
rlmimalrii from ju’ople's lives
I I relieve c onflic t is real pro
ductive and we can learn to
maker it more prodiu live In
managing it lietter ourselves."
she said
The mediation program is
funded ecjualls In the students
and the administration, and its
services .ire available to everv
one in the l!mversit\ mmimi
mt\
"25 Years ot
Quality Service”
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