□THINGS TO DO
Eugene offers entertaining variety on a student's budget
One soon learns on a stu
dent's budget how to amuse
oneself on little or no cash.
By Lorraine Rath
Years of Top Harden destitution
have yielded quite a list of
entertaining pastimes All you
need is an open mind and
perhaps a cynic's eye, and the
diversity of Kugene will provide
all the enterainment you need.
One thing a newcomer might
notice is that this city is home to
an amazing array of. shall we
say “odd" individuals But the
shock wears off and what's left
is a motherlode of entertain
ment. Take our world-famous
transients, for example
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• Other casual home
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• Natural fiber clothing
• Contemporary Jewelry
• Fashion Accessories
Designs to
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Eugene's street people can
provide varying levels of
amusement, depending on how
much you're willing to spend
A buck still goes a long way; a
life story perhaps, or some ex
clusive tidbit of advice or infor
mation. Ninety-three cents once
got me a warning that new hear
ing aid devices were transmit
ters for Soviet subliminal
messages. An informational
bargain. I'd say.
Quarters are OK. Three of
them gets you a "thanks" and a
compliment, such as "hey. love
those shoes." or "you're as
pretty as my sister." (The latter
may not be so flattering, depen
ding on the vagrant.)
A warning, however, to those
offering smaller increments —
don't. Dimes and nickels will
land you only a disgusted grunt
which translates quickly into:
"cheap son of a-!” And pen
nies? Oh boy. An outright insult
to their profession. Anyone
presenting copper oughta dam
well know how to dodge a can
of Western Family steamed
tomatoes. Street people have
amazingly good aim. )ust ask
me about the knot on my temple
sometime.
Now drugs aren't exactly an
inexpensive form of entertain
ment. however drug addicts in
Eugene can be. The game here
is "Name that hallucinogen."
and it doesn't cost the observer
a dime. That man outside of
Taylor's, is he on mushrooms,
or a quaalude derivitive? You be
the jugde.
Categorization usually is
determined by what part of the
body the addict addresses while
talking to himself. The details
here will be spard but one gets
quite proficient at detection.
Scoring is based on the point
system, with bonuses for identi
fying multiple drug usage.
Now on the other end of the
spectrum, we have those ultra
health conscious nutrition
technicians (or more aptly know
in some circles as "granola
crunchers") who abhor preser
vative and consider irregularity
to be a dirty word.
Unfortunately, the members
of this group are passive, slow
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CENTER HOURS:
By Appointment.
Mon-Fri 8:00 a m.-4:30 p.m.
Urgent Care.
(No Appointment Necessary)
^ Mon-Sat 8:00 a.m.-8:00 p.m.
* Sunday 12 Noon-8:00 p.m.
moving types and not real ex
citing to look at. The entertain
ment here is to be found in the
places they frequent. Have you
ever been to a Eugene health
food store? They’re everywhere
in this town, while the Hostess
delivery-truck driver is as lone
ly as the Maytag repairman. The
real earthy stores carry organic
substances I wouldn’t shovel,
let alone package. Rare strains
of protein-infested fungi are
definitely more amusing to look
at than the people who ingest
them.
My version of ‘‘Let's Make a
Deal” becomes "Let's Make a
Meal." Instead of guessing
what's behind bin number one.
you make a stab at what’s in it.
What fun. But please be warn
ed. The last biochemistry grad
to walk into a campus-area
heath food place had to be car
ried out on a Depend undergar
ment. Now that’s
entertainment!
The list of people-watching
prospects goes on. as does the
forms of entertainment they
provide. So even on a student’s
budget there is never a shortage
of cheap entertainment. But
there io something to keep in
mind while the other members
of the colorful community are
keeping you amused. You as a
member of one particular group
or another are providing a bit of
entertainment for someone.
That’s what keeps Eugene so
wonderfully interesting.
Recognition and appreciation of
variety — indeed the spice of
life.
Looking for a
place to live?
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