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Group helps stepfamily members
adapt to different customs, beliefs
By (k>lin Stanton
Of lW ImmU
Eugene has one of the highest
divorce rates in the nation, ac
cording to Mary Dwan. a
Eugene counselor who
specializes in remarriage
counseling.
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Because of these high
statistics, Dwan founded the
first Oregon chapter of the Step
family Association of America,
an organization that provides an
outlet for individuals or
families who are seeking help in
coping with the problems of a
second family. A 13-year
member of a stepfamily, she
founded the chapter in Eugene
in 1984
Dwan decided to form the
chapter shortly after her move
here three years ago, largely
because she was "surprised that
with such a high divorce rate in
Eugene there was no organiza
tion designed to help families
affected by it," she said.
The SAA offers a weekly
drop-in support group, monthly
seminars on topics crucial to
stepfamilies and a bimonthly
newsletter. In addition, the
group recently added a phone
line people can call if they just
want to talk about their pro
blems and search for solutions
with a friendly, experienced -
voice.
"We're really excited about
that." said Karen Keady, cur
rent chapter president. "That's
a neat service."
The group also serves as a
voice for stepfamilies. whether
lobbying for governmental sup
port or answering questions for
the media.
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“If the local media wants the
stepfamily view of something,
they come to us,“ Keady said.
"We’ve been on television a few
times.”
Other chapters exist in
Berkeley, Calif., and Portland,
and another will soon be star
ting in Salem.
"Helping other chapters start
out is another one of our roles,”
Keady said. "We'll help the
Salem chapter get started once
they're ready to go.”
The problems that people
bring to the SAA are fairly
predictable. Dwan said. Most
seem to come from the clash of
two families forcing together
their separate customs and
beliefs.
"Imagine you arfi a 10-year
old boy, and suddenly you have
a new stepfather who believes
in strict discipline, Do you
think you'll be very incepting of
that? No, you wop't,” Dwan
explained.
This is also prevalent in
smaller matters such as
deciding what foods to eat,
Dwan said. Stepchildren may
often use these conflicts to
challenge their new parent, say
ing, "Daddy never used to make
me do that," or "Mommy never
made us eat that,” she said.
Turn to Stepfamily. Page 15
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