In the Big Brother/Big Sister program
Students find a 'little'
change of pace
By Diana Elliott
CM the Emerald
Shelly and Sandy Means
remember the day they met their
twin little sisters, Heidi and
Heather. Although the Means
sisters are not related to the
10-year-old twins, the four are
bound by a relationship they
deem just as close.
Sandy, Shelly, Heather, and
Heidi are all involved in the cam
pus Big Brother/Big Sister pro
gram, a creation of the YWCA.
The program, now in its 17th
year at the University, matches 60
to 75 University students each
year with little brothers or sisters
from single parent families.
The children (referred to as tit
tles) are chosen by recommenda
tions from teachers, counselors
and sometimes parents. They
range in age from five to 14 years
old and come from grade schools,
middle schools and high schools
in the 4-J school district. There's
even a program in which deaf
children are matched with big
brothers and sisters who can sign
or are also deaf.
The program “aims at bringing a
positive influence into the lives of
kids who are living in a negative
situation, having recently moved
or suffered a divorce or death in
the family," says Carolyn Higgins,
campus coordinator for the
program.
"We see this program as a last
ditch attempt to save a violent or
problem child," adds Carol Givi, a
counselor at McCornack Elemen
tary School.
So Givi seeks littles who are
either extra shy or "squirrelly"
and just need a friend to give
them some attention. "I try to
keep my eyes open for kids from
low income housing who don't
have other options," Givi says.
"They are just regular kids who
need a larger view of the world
because their view is restricted by
time and money."
Although big brothers and sisters
(referred to as bigs) aren't meant
to be babysitters, Givi admits the
program gives parents a needed
break. "It gives the parents time
with their other children," she
says. "Also, single parents can get
awfully worn out and their
resources can become limited,"
she says.
This is where the bigs fit in. "It's
like a long-lost relative comes
along and their whole world
opens up,” Givi says. "The bigs
bring the University to the tittles,
which is a world they never knew
before. They get so excited," she
says.
A dose of excitement is exactly
what Heather and Heidi got when
they were invited to Sandy's
sorority for a formal dinner.
"The twins are real tomboys so
it was fun to dress them up and
bring them to dinner," Sandy
says.
"Once they got over the shock
of wearing dresses they were
fine," Shelly says. "They got a lot
of attention from Sandy's sorority
sisters and they loved it."
But not all the benefits go to the
littles.
"I get at least as much out of
this program as Heather and Heidi
do," Shelly says.
Sandy agrees.
"I really didn't have many ex
pectations at first, but now I
realize I'm getting much more
than I ever anticipated."
"You really learn what it means
to be a parent," Shelly adds. "And
you learn how to apply all the
theories you learn in psychology
class."
Both Shelly and Sandy think
they offer a feminine influence on
the girls they can't get at home
because the twins live with their
father.
"Their father really is great with
the girls," Sandy says, "but he
can't help them buy clothes or
bake cookies. I think he realizes
that because he appreciates the
time we spend with them."
When asked to sum up the
rewards, most bigs will say the
gratification that comes with be
ing a child's friend is the biggest
return, but there are others
advantages.
"I think many students want a
little brother or sister because
they are separated from their real
little brothers and sisters at
home," Higgins says. Still, others
do it because they just want to
help and make friends with a child
in need.
Unfortunately just caring about
children doesn't automatically
qualify a person to be able to help.
Givi is especially worried about
University students who pledge
their time, only to realize that they
can't follow through.
"Students have to really think it
through, before they commit
themselves." she says. "It can be
very upsetting to a child if his or
her big brother or sister often
cancels out. This just tells the
child that he or she is not impor
tant. And that can be detri
mental.
But sometimes the situation is
reversed and the little isn't around
when the big comes to pick the
child up. "This is also rare and is
usually a result of a parent who
feels threatened or perhaps
jealous of the big," Civi says.
But for the most part there are
few problems. Civi attributes this
to the thorougn screening process
Higgins insists on.
First potential big brothers and
sisters fill out applications and list
at least three references. Ap
plicants then are interviewed for
at least an hour by Higgins. "I like
to get to know each applicant, but
I also want to make sure the ap
Continued on Page 8A
Graphic by Shawn Bird
'It's like a long-lost relative comes along and
their whole world opens up' — Carol Givi
U of O Foundation
Annual Fund
TELEFUND
STATISTICS
100.000
90.000
80.000
70.000
60.000
50.000
40.000
30.000
20.000
10.000
On 10/25/83 22 Delta Gam
ma Volunteers received 172
pledges for a total of
$3,690.
First, second and third
place for most pledges
received are held by:
1st. ROTC - 371
2nd. Delta Gamma - 172
3rd. Alphi Phi - 158
That brings the total for the
telefund to $27,903.
Tonight Kappa Sigma will
attempt to set a new record
for total pledges received.
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