l.
VINO'S
SPRGHEVTI
V
342-8111
\
TINO’S
• Full dinner menu
• 23 varieties of Pizzas
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white crust
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pages 112-113, for names of
departmental advising
coordinators.
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sean meyers
Save the Veals
As Ocean and Farm Animals
Safety reporter for the
Emerald, many sad incidents
come to my attention each day
— disoriented whales that
swim inland, harmless ducks
and geese drenched in diesel
fuel.
But of all the tragedies to
cross my desk, nothing ap
proaches the heart-wrenching
story of Bobby the Veal Calf.
I was opening what seemed
to be a routine letter from the
farm (Farm Animal Reform
Movement), when this adver
tisement reached out and
grabbed me by my intellectual
groin:
"Bobby is a 14- weak-old
‘veal’ calf. After his birth,
he was separated from
his mother, chained in a
2 by 4 ft. wooden crate in
total darkness, and fed a
special liquid designed
to make him anemic.
This produces the pale,
soft flesh so prized by
‘gourmets.’
"Bobby will be able to
walk, to stretch, to
associate with other
calves, and to see the
sky only once — on his
way to the slaugh
terhouse... ARE
YOU REALLY THAT
HUNGRY?”
The fact of the matter
was, 30 minutes before, I
really had been that
hungry. At the EMU Fountain
Court Cafe, I had just polished
off a breaded veal cutlet
crested with a daub of brown
gravy. To the extent that a
$1.75, four-course meal can be
palatable, it was quite good.
But in the Emerald office
moments later, with Bobby the
Veal Calf’s warm and
sensuous brown eyes gazing
back up at me from this adver
tisement, I felt a churning of
discontent In my bowels. The
thought that even as I read
about Bobby's ordeal, my
digestive enzymes could be
finishing off this hapless
s!
I
creature was almost too much
of a burden to bear. Almost.
It was then that I realized,
damn It, Bobby may still be
alive. It was my Job as Ocean
and Farm Animals Safety
reporter for the Emerald, nay
my moral obligation as a
human being, to do what I
could to set his beleaguered
young life on a less troubled
path.
The hat was passed around
the Emerald office, and within
a matter of hours nearly $100
had been collected for the
Adopt Bobby the Veal Calf
fund. My spirits soared — It
might not be too late to save
Bobby.
My fingers trembled as I
acknowledged that the adver
tisement had been run
repeatedly in the Washington
Post, New York Times, San
Francisco Chronicle and the
Los Angeles Times, among
other publications.
But, said Hershaft, out of
the millions of people that
must have read about Bobby’s
plight, not a single one had
called to offer assistance.
Well, Dr. Hershaft, I said, we
at the Emeraid want to help
Bobby. Just tell us where he
is, and we’ll save him.
"Actually, Bobby is a sym
bolic animal. There was no
specific animal that was nam
ed Bobby,” admitted Hershaft.
dialed the number of Dr. Alex
Hershaft, president of FARM
headquarters in Washington,
D.C. If anyone knew of
Bobby's whereabouts, he
would.
I imagined my phone call in
tercepting an executioner in
the nick of time, Just as his
sword was drawn high over the
quivering mass of fatted veal
calf that was Bobby. Batting a
nervous eyelash, Bobby would
moo softly in gratitude as he
was led from the slaughter
towards a rich and rewarding
life.
Dr. Hersha** seemed sur
prised to get my call. He
__ Duuuy waa a lupiuaun*
tation of the millions of
farm animals that die
each year. I guess we
just assumed that peo
ple would realize that
Bobby was just a
symbol."
I was shattered, but
even so my journalistic
instincts remained in
tact. Didn’t this solicita
tion for contributions to
FARM smack of false
and deceptive advertis
ing? And what about the
drawing above the adver
tisement — are we to
I believe that Bobby’s
strong jaw, sensitive
eyes and rugged-yet
handsome features were
just a figment of an artist’s im
agination? Come on, buster,
where’s Bobby?
"It’s pretty easy to know
what happened to Bobby. He
was slaughtered for veal like
millions of other calves each
year,” said Hershaft, who was
beginning to get a bit testy. "I
made him up. Young calves
are called ‘bobs,’ that’s how
he got his name. There is no
Bobby."
No Bobby the Veal Calf?
Maybe not. By now, he’s pro
bably Bobby the Breaded Veal
Cutlet.
Good luck Bobby, wherever
your little hooves may trod.
t!i<
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