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-----Emerald Graphic
Women must be allied,
panel members agree
By LESLIE FARRIS
Of the Emerald
Women must become more women-iden
tified if they are to regain the power long
denied them.
That was the consensus of participants at
a Wednesday Women's Symposium panel ti
tled "Ma, Can I Be a Feminist and Still Like
Men?"
"One thing that’s happened to women
because of our society’s compulsory
heterosexuality is that we see our relationships
with men as a different caliber relationship
than those with women," said Kap Richards, a
feminist counselor. “We need to make long
term committed relationships with other
women as we have with other men."
In her work as a counselor, Richards said
she sees the oppressive nature of male-female
relationships as a crucial problem, with
women most frequently the victims. That
oppression is built on a foundation of violence
— whether actual, implied or historical, she
said
“While men are not oppressed as women
are, they are stuck. Their rewards for being the
oppressor are small,” she said.
While many women attending the discus
sion agreed that there are men who would like
to end women’s oppression, most believed that
few men are actively confronting sexism.
"Very few men are dealing with feminism
as an important factor in their lives," said Jean
Lorraine. “Some men will show support when
they talk with me personally, but they won’t put
their asses on the line when in mixed com
pany.”
Men who want to support feminism should
work with other men because that's where the
work is needed, one audience member said.
Richards suggested that if women act as
though they expect men to be their allies,
maybe some men will live up to those expec
tations. She said most men were socialized not
to respect women as equals, and most men will
continue that disrespect. If women expect the
worst from men, they may alienate potential
allies, she said.
Another panel member, Rene Cobb, said
the question, "Can you like men and still be a
feminist?” mistakenly implies women’s rela
tionships with women are defined by women’s
relationships with men.
"It also implies the false myth that lesbians
are man-haters,” said Cobb, who is a lesbian.
One reason for the myth is that a lot of men
have trouble accepting lesbians because
lesbians do not act for men’s approval, said an
audience member.
Cobb said all feminists — heterosexual or
lesbian — should work to end the "institution of
compulsory heterosexuality” because it aff
ects all women and reinforces male supre
macy.
It's not enough to view lesbianism as
merely a personal preference of sexuality,
Cobb said. ‘‘Many feminists see
heterosexuality as an economic relationship,
but they fail to see the economic hardships of
lesbians in a heterosexual society.
Panel member Marcia Kraus said non
lesbian and lesbian women should work
together against society’s oppressive institu
tions and not let relationships with men cloud
the issues.
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