As an entertainment reporter for the
Thursday Revue, I have grown
accustomed to the diversity of the
performing arts in Eugene. I have
attended many good and traditional
productions, and occasionally have
been assigned the type of performance I
prefer: the bizarre and unusual. When
the woman from Live Matinee opened
the door Saturday morning for our
interview wearing electric green
knickers and day-glo-looking lipstick, I
knew it was going to be one of the great
ones.
“Vicky Va Va Voom," (the owner of
the knickers) led me to the stage of
Cinema 7 to meet some of her friends.
Although it was a little difficult to keep
up with her as she clicked along in her
yellow, red, and green plastic shoes, I
followed, intrigued by the strange
sounds I heard issuing forth from the
stage door.
In a heavy Italian accent, Vicky Va Va
Voom introduced me to her friends,
fellow cast members of Live Matinee.
"Grandma," wearing a frayed yellow
bathrobe and a pink lampshade, urged
me to call her Inez.
" Fluffy,” the groupie, confided to me
that she had had affairs with all the men
in the company and had married many
of them.
"She’s a gopher, she goes for us,"
shouted a cast member from some
corner.
"A concerned citzen” looked out at
me through the goggles attatched to his
aviator hat and offered me some
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I popcorn.
i "Excuse that line," he said. "We re
' usually funnier after many cups of
coffee and many cigarettes.”
“Bob Cornstead,” a farmer from Iowa,
began dancing around the stage, doing
strange things with a pitchfork. I'll leave
it to your imagination.
“Coach Conchitta,” of the world
famous women's basketball team,
began blowing a whistle, which set off a
"dog” wearing a Hagen-Daas T-shirt,
clip-on fur ears, and a spiked collar.
When the dog began attacking
Grandma, I sank into a chair readying
my Saturday morning brain for a strange
conversation.
A "ward of the courts” entered the
group and slunk into a seat
unobtrusively. The amazing band of
people circled around, anxious to
spread the word of their cosmic
“coming together."
“We all were scraping minds
everywhere for the greatest cosmic
jokes,” Vicky Va Va Voom confided to
me, twirling her over-sized strand of
pearls with her fingers.
"Like a giant griddle scraper," Coach
Conchitta rejoined, peering out from
beneath her baseball hat.
The dog with the clip-on ears
continued to pounce on Grandma with
loud barks, and Bob Cornstead said:
‘Don’t mind him, Vicky fed him Cream
of Wheat this morning and he has
heartburn.”
“He also plays the saxophone,” Vicky
Va Va Voom quipped. “But anyway, I
was working in my Italian disco clothes
boutique, which is big and famous, in
Italy, and I jetted to Greece, because I
am a big international star after what
Mark Eden did for me, and I can do
things like that. I met all these people at
a kiosk in the airport."
Fluffy the Groupie looked up from
practicing ape faces with Grandma Inez
who by this time had beaten off the dog.
“It was a cosmic occurrence,” She
added
“Yes, we were all there, because
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cosmically we have known each other
since birth, and it was destined that we
would all meet trying to buy the same
porno magazine in a kiosk in Greece.
You see we all possess the same
birthmark on our upper left arm.” Vicky
Va Va Voom said, and grinned. Last
year they each had a birthmark on their
pinky finger.
“I was in Mechanicsville, Iowa just in
the middle of digging up refrigerators,
sinks and spring-mattresses, when I was
transported to a kiosk in Greece,”
Cornstead told me. "It was wild.”
The members of Live Matinee made
the trip from Greece to Eugene because
the cosmic properties in the air are
better ingested from the moisture. They
have banded together for three seasons
as Live Matinee, a company dedicated
to embarrassing themselves, and
making the world laugh. The members
express a need to satirize Eugene,
politics, religion, sex, animals, music,
sports, and basically anything else they
can think of. They also produce
"cosmic” homemade films which they
show during the performance.
The show, which they describe as a
“Superhuman comedy of vision and
depth,” will run this Friday at 8 and 10
p.m. ($3.50) and Saturday at 2 p.m.
($2.50) at Cinema 7 in the Atrium. The
final shows of the season will run at the
same times the following weekend: May
15, and 16. Tickets are available at the
door. Children under 12 will be turned
away.
"We always sell out," Vicky Va Va
Voom told me, adjusting whatever
material she and Mark Eden had placed
in her expansive mammary glands.
"This is a partying show. Everyone gets
involved in the cosmic experience. We
expect the people who come and see us
to also do a little partying before the
show. I advise you to purchase tickets
early.”
After the May 16 performance, the
company will disband for the summer
and return to Cinema 7 next fall. As one
member so succinctly put it, “We’d
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rather sun than pun.”
Fluffy the Groupie told me she’d
either like to clean gums this summer or
float around on a houseboat.
Vicky Va Va Voom added that she
would be a trans-Atlantic traveler
commuting to the United States from
Montebello, Italy.
”1 want to put more time into my very
successful chain of Italian-American
miniature golf courses and practice
putting,” she said with a knowing look
at the other cast members. She also
hopes to open a winery in California
(Vicky’s Vines), where, as she says,
“The grapes are big and full.”
Grandma can’t remember what she is
going to do, but wants to take a cure in
a rest home. Bob Cornstead suggested
either Pleasant Valley, Happy Valley, or
Warm Valley.
Coach Conchitta is returning to the
team. And the dog will run free, because
dogs run free.
Story by Sheri-Lyn Scully
Inside Photos by Lynn Suprelle
Cover Photo by Jimmi Harris
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fflriri fi
PUBLIC NOTICE...STEREO LIQUIDATION
California Stereo Liquidators, Federal No. 95-3531037, will dispose
of, for a manufacturer's representative, their inventory
surplus of new stereo equipment. The items listed below will be sold
on a first-come first-served basis at.. .Ramada Inn (Conference Room)
3540 Gateway, Springfield, Oregon 9:00 A.M. to 2:00 P.M.
Saturday, May 9, 1981 ONLY WHILE QUANTITIES LAST!
5 Only AM/FM Cassette
Car Stereos, In Dash
5 Only AM/FM 8 Trk
Car Stereo In Dash
20 Only 8 Track Car
Stereos, Underdash
20 Only Cassette Car
Stereos, Underdash
32 Only AM/FM/8 track
Car Stereos In Dash (Best)
Disposal
Value price
$159. $29 each
$139 $29 each
$69 $19 each
$75 $25 each
$165 $59 each
30 Only AM/FM Cassette
Car Stereos In Dash (Best)
20 Pair Only Modular
4 Way Speakers
$189 $59 each
$179 $89
pair
22 Pair Only Coaxial Car
Speakers Giant Mags
20 Pair Only Triaxial Car
Speakers. Giant Mags
Value
$89
$119
Disposal
Price
$29 Pa"
$49 pair
18 Only Graphic Equalizers
For Car, High Wattage
$159 $39 each
23 Pair Only 2 Way Car
Speakers. Dual Cone
10 Only AM'FM in Dash
Cassettes For Small Cars
22 Only AM FM Cassettes
For Car with Auto Reuerse
27 Only Power Boosters
For Stereo High Wattage
$49 $19
pair
$225 $89 each
$225 $89 each
$89 $29 each
ALL BRAND NEW MERCHANDISE WITH FULL
2 YEAR WARRANTIES
Buy one or all of the above quantities listed - The public is invited
VISA. MASTERCARD. CASH OR PERSONAL CHECKS WELCOME
ONE DAY ONLY - SATURDAY. MAY 9th
ONLY WHILE QUANTITIES LAST
op;
JO/N OUR
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Call Collect: *
Pofitland
503 635-6346
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IMPORTED
coffee
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Bv the Pound or by the Cup
Kinko’s
764 E. 13th
344 .7894
Bean of the Month
Guatemala
Antiqua
$4.30 lb.
Compare Our Prices
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Classifieds
LANE COUNTY
EXCESS PROPERTY
SEALED BID SALE
May 13-14,1981
60 Bicycles - Boys - Ladies - Mens
SEALED BID TO THE HIGHEST
RESPONSIBLE BIDDER
All items will be clearly marked with a MINIMUM ACCEPTABLE BID PRICE
All items may be viewed and bids deposited at Lane County Central Purchasing,
3040 N Delta Hiway, Eugene, Or between 9:00 a m and 3:00 pm, MAY 13th and
May 14th, 1981
NO BID WILL BE ACCEPTED AFTER 3:00 P.M., MAY 14, 1981
Bid instructions, bid lists, envelopes and bid forms will be available at the Central
Purchasing Office
Successful bidders will be called Friday, Monday and Tuesday, May 15, 18 and
19,1981 Units not picked up by May 21,1981 may be ottered to the next highest
bidder
PAYMENT SHALL BE CASH OR CERTIFIED FUNDS ONLY. SUCCESSFUL
BIDDERS WILL NEED PROOF OF IDENTIFICATION UPON PAYMENT AND
PICKUP OF ITEMS.
NOTICE TO CLAIMANTS OF LOST AND STOLEN PROPERTY:
Any property duly reported to the Lane County Sheriff's Office, Eugene Police
Department or Springfield Police Department as "Stolen or Lost' will be
released, subject to a documented copy of the police report and proof of
purchase, giving a full description and serial number
Such items must be claimed by Thursday, May 14, 1981,3:00 P M and removed
LANE COUNTY DEPARTMENT OF
FINANCE AND GENERAL SERVICES,
SUPPORT SERVICES DIVISION
Fred A. Manela
Support Services Manager
Phone: 687-4135
<emu
Cultural Forum Presents
SUNDAY, MAY 17, 1981
18th and AGATE SOCCER FIELD
NOON-SUNSET
<5MUS 1C FEST
DESTINY AWAITS YOU
A DAY OF FROLICKING AND MUSIC OUTDOORS
• U P E P O •
• THE BILL FELDMANN BAND*
•KUKRUDU*
• LON GlIITARSK Y*
$3.50/ U of O Students
$4*30/ General Public
CATES OPEN AT 11:10
TICKETS AVAILABLE AT THE EMU MAIN DESK, TOAD HALL HI-FI,
BREMEN TOWN RECORDS (VALLEY RIVER) ORDER TICKETS BY PHONE
MMH)
NO BOTTLES OR CANS • NO PETS • RAIN OR SHINE
. -wV
In the unlikely event at torrential reins, the Music
Fest would he held In the EMU Ballroom. Due te
space limitations, only ticket numbers 1 1000
wauld be admitted. These 1000 will be available
only at the EMU Main Desk. All other ticket
numbers would be refunded at the EMU Main Desk.
tMU CULTURE
* FORUM 1
PRODUCTION
VV>V