A Typewriter
Warned In Hell
By JOCK HATFIELD
Of the Emerald
Police are still trying to piece
together evidence in the Eugene
thigh murder case. Meanwhile,
the trial drags on.
The judge says he hopes to
achieve a fair arid unbiased ver
dict, in spite of hundreds of dis
memberment jokes now making
the rounds.
"This is a grave and serious
issue," he says with a thigh.
* *********
Learn Chinese in 30 years:
For the next 30 years, the
Emerald, in conjunction with the
University language department,
will be offering this clip-out
Chinese course. The language
department thinks it is a good in
vention, because it offers a
chance for daily readers to digest
a language without thinking. Stu
dents will get the cultural enrich
ment and general confusion of a
1
COMING ATTRACTIONS!
★ DAVE VAN RONK - FRI. APR. 28th
Oriainator of “Cocaine Blues”
8:30 & 11:30 - Tickets: $3.50 adv. - $4.50 day of show
★ SONNY TERRY & BROWNIE McGHEE
Fri. & Sat., May 5th & 6th
830 & 11:30 - Tickets: $3.75 adv. - $4.75 day of show
160 S. PARK - Fine Dining Too - Over 21 witti ID
Tickets at the Sun Shop - Everybody’s Records & The Place
I
^gTHWEC/C^
APRIL 22 8:30-11:30
EMU BALLROOM
DANCE
TO
g)AKOTAH
ticket outlets
sun shop
emu main desk
everybody’s record comp. $1.50
SURVIVAL CENTER BENEFITl
second language, one line at a
time.
Languages such as French,
Italian, Spanish and German,
bear many resemblances to En
glish, and therefore offer the stu
dent only half-assed cultural di
versity. But Chinese has abso
lutely no similarity to anything in
telligible. Students will be mari
nated and pickled in cultural di
versity, and will spend many
happy hours in wonderment.
At the end of 30 years, students
will get special satisfaction out of
being able to say everything they
say now with different words.
True, students who try their lan
guage out in China will look like
damned fools. But as long as our
students stay within English
speaking countries, they will pass
for intellectuals and feel well re
warded for their 30-year invest
ment.
Now let’s try today’s sentence.
‘Uncle Ho we mean business.’’ It
comes out differently in Chinese:
ars-ist.
Repeat after me:
Once more:
hRiLlffiDi, $On«
ftjjjcFfftm.mfoVik
Very good. In Chinese, your
voice rises at the beginning of
each letter, falls at then end and
fools around a good deal in be
tween.
Pronounce the following sylla
bles with the aid of the intonation
arrow:
and
®jE£
Now put them together:
r
j
Very good. The Chinese have
no R sound in their language, so
go back and delete all the Rs you
have pronounced since the be
ginning of this lesson and substi
tute the vowel sound
Do this three times.
Next week we will cope with the
idiomatic expression:
which gave the first white visitors
to China a very good laugh.
**********
Ducks, have you been raped
recently?
The rape crisis line can help.
We offer personal emotional and
psychological counseling. Don’t
let them hold you under water.
Call anytime, day or night.
**********
Alan Sychophant (with the hairy
arms), new Honors College di
rector, tells his students about
Nietszche's problem.
Native Americans set visit
By CINDA ARNOLD
Of the Emerald
Fourteen students from
Chemawa Indian School in Salem
will participate in a University visi
tation program sponsored by the
Native American Student Union
(NASU) today and Saturday.
The program arose from a need
for more active recruitment of
minority students, according to
Kathy Stevens, project director.
She hopes it will increase aware
ness of higher education to Native
American high school students.
The students arrive this after
noon to tour the campus and visit
various departments. Saturday
morning University Pres. William
Boyd will speak to the group, and
academic advisors from selected
departments will speak about var
ious fields of study and career al
ternatives available in those
fields.
In the afternoon, the students
will tour dormatories before par
ticipating in a forum on community
and student services available to
Native American students in
WE ARE HIRING
If you are looking for immediate responsibility and practical experi
ence after graduation, consider the U.S. Navy. The Navy is seeking
highly qualified, capable individuals for challenging positions as
Naval Officers. Interviews will be held for the following fields:
NUCLEAR PROPULSION LAW
PERSONNEL MANAGEMENT AVIATION
NURSING MEDICINE
ENGINEER CORPS/CE, ME, EE, ChE BUSINESS
PLACE:
EMU CENTURY ROOM
OR
PLACEMENT OFFICE
DATE:
24-28 APRIL 1978
NAVY REP:
LT MITCH MOORE
LTJG DEE BOLTER
1220 SW Third, Suite 576
Portland, Ore
Phone: 221-3041
9fc9k3|e9fe)|c9|c3|Kfe)fe)ie3|c)ic9|e3tC3|c9ic9|e)|e9ic9ic9|c9tc3fc)ic9tc9tc3te9ie)|c>|e
Eugene. Representatives from
the student services and financial
aid offices, ASUO, Center for Self
Development, Ethnic Studies and
NASU will take part in the forum.
Saturday evening the students
will attend a dinner hosted by
NASU. Bob Tom, a Native Ameri
can leader, will emcee the dinner.
Representatives from the Indian
Women's Club of
Eugene/Springfield, Eugene In
dian Center, Indian Center, Indian
Program on Alcohol and Drug
Awareness, and Native and Eth
nic Studies will speak at the din
ner.
To conclude the visit, students
will fill out an evaluation sheet on
the effectiveness of the program.
Stevens says, “We’ll measure
our successes with this visit. We
hope to go all over the state with it
next year.”
There are presently 26 Native
American students on campus,
and NASU feels more active re
cruitment is necessary. Stevens
says one of the main purposes of
the visitation program is to let Na
tive Americans know there are
minority students on campus, and
there are, in turn, persons in the
community to whom the students
can turn.
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^T^*
Applications are now available for the position of
1978-79 OREGON DAILY EMERALD EDITOR
Applicants should have knowledge of newspaper journalism and of the University
of Oregon.
Term of office is June 6,1978 through June 4,1979. Monthly salary of $500 begins
May 1, 1978. Editor must be enrolled at least 6 credit hours, 3 or 4 terms while holding
office. Position requires work Sunday through Friday and a minimum of 35-40 hours
per week.
Applications are available in Oregon Daily Emerald offices and must be returned to
Cheri O’Neil, 300 EMU before 5 p.m. April 21, 1978.
The Oregon Daily Emerald is an Equal Opportunity/Affirmative Action Employer.
Women, minorities and the handicapped are encouraged to apply.
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