Watching the River Flow
By STEVE DODGE
Of the Emerald
Type, n. Pestilent bits of metal
suspected of destroying civiliza
tion and enlightenment despite
their obvious agency in this in
comparable dictionary.
Ambrose Bierce,
The Devil’s Dictionary
If Ambrose Bierce hadn't dis
appeared into Mexico in 1913, he
probably would have had a few
similar words for television. But
since he wasn’t around we’ll have
to settle for other forms of feed
back:
In a survey conducted by the
San Francisco Examiner, the
Tickle deodorant commercial was
was rated the worst in the country,
followed by Pepto-Bismol’s “dis
gustingly distorted acid indiges
tion sufferers.”
Other “winners” in the
Examiner’s “most-hated com
mercials” letter poll were: Geritol,
Clorox and its spokesman who
tears clothes in half, Schlitz beer
for its ads “threatening to kill you if
you don't drink Schlitz” and Char
min bathroom tissue’s “Mr. Whip
ple” series.
Also mentioned were the Suc
rets commercial in which the man
wakes up his wife to complain he
has a cold, and in case you didn’t
guess, the Wisk series on "ring
around the collar.”
jjc * * * * * *
Not to be outdone, the Christ
ian Science Monitor, which de
spite the name is not a religious
newspaper, ran a poll of its own.
The Monitor poll, however, con
cerned TV shows.
Experts in various fields and
readers were asked to comment
on TV programming. The results
showed that teachers liked “Wel
come Back Kotter” (ABC) and that
police officers liked Barney Miller”
(ABC) and "Police Story” (CBS).
The shows that received the
most criticism were “Baretta”
(ABC) and “Soap” (ABC), fol
lowed by “Good Times" (CBS)
and “ What’s Happening” (ABC).
The experts agreed that series
television on the three networks
was mainly a group of stereotypes
interrupted by commercials featur
ing the same stereotypes. Over
and over again, according to the
Monitor, readers praised the Pub
lic Broadcasting Service (PBS)
and claimed they watched only
PBS regularly, with network
viewing time limited largely to a
few carefully selected series,
mini-series and specials.
* * * * * * *
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1.
In still another poll, lowans
were asked by the Des Moines
Sunday Register to rank 39 gov
ernmental, business, religious
and social institutions.
The top six were, in order; God,
the Iowa Highway Patrol, financial
institutions, the medical profes
sion, hospitals and organized re
ligion.
The poll also revealed lowans
have more confidence in grocery
stores than in the FBI.
* * * * * * *
Johnny Carson had a few
“true stories” to relate the other
night.
“A man in Buffalo,” he said,
“walked into a department store
with money glued on his face and
demanded a ski mask."
And speaking of the recent
burning of 8 tons of marijuana in
the City of Eugene’s steam heat
system: “95 percent of the resi
dents in the city’s nursing homes
recorded rock albums that night.”
* * * * * * *
When Oregon Gov. Bob
Straub journeyed to the Mexican
province of Sonora recently, the
Mexican governor asueu rum nuw
to increase tourism there.
According to a close friend,
Straub noted the abundant litter in
the province and recommended
the Oregon Bottle bill. Straub is
reportedly sending the Mexican
governor information on the bill.
* * * * * * *
The Japanese have introduced
a record player that uses a laser
beam instead of a needle, and
doesn't wear out records, accord
ing to the Associated Press.
A small laser gun on the turnta
ble casts a beam on a 12-inch
wide silvery disc rotating 1,800
times a minute.
Characteristics of the disk's
54,000 grooves are turned into
sound that is reproduced through
speakers. A regular poly vinyl disk
is used on the player.
*4c * * * * *
It had been so long (Six years)
since the Grateful Dead visited
Eugene that their road manager
called the University Main Desk in
the EMU for information on hotel
accomodations and how to get to
campus from the airport.
Health official says
] inoculation beats flu
WASHINGTON (AP) — The
risks from dying of influenza are
1,000 times greater than the risks
of dying from vaccination, a gov
ernment health official said Mon
day.
Dr. William Foege, director of
the Center for Disease Control
(CDC), made the assertion to a
panel of experts considering
whether to recommend a mass
inoculation campaign against the
Russian flu. The new flu strain
broke out in Cheyenne, Wyo., re
cently and is expected to spread
later this winter or next winter.
Foege sought to allay the fears
raised by the problem-plagued
swine flu inoculation campaign of
1976.
The swine flu inoculation cam
paign in 1976 came to a rapid halt
after some persons who were in
oculated contracted Guillain
Barre Syndrome, a paralyzing
disease that can lead to death.
The swine flu epidemic never oc
curred.
Although considered relatively
mild, the Russian flu has spread
rapidly among children in the
Soviet Union and elsewhere in
Europe and Asia. It struck more
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than 30 percent of children 14 and
younger in Leningrad in recent
weeks, according to reports re
layed by U.S. health researchers
who visited Moscow last week.
Russian flu is an A-type flu
strain similar to viruses that
caused outbreaks of flu around
the world from 1947 to 1950. Fif
teen states currently report wide
spread outbreaks of the more
familiar A-Victoria and A-Texas
flu, which also occurred last
winter.
Americans between ages 24
and 50 are considered to have
some immunity to the Russian flu,
while children and young adults
are the prime targets. Federal
health officials said persons over
50 also are in the high-risk groups,
particularly because the elderly
run the highest risk of serious ill
ness or death from theJIu.
Although one drug-maker is
preparing to start production of a
Russian flu vaccine, the vaccine
won’t be ready for at least two
months, when the current flu sea
son will be drawing to a close.
Federal health officials decided
last year that the increased risk of
Guillain-Barre was likely to occur
with any influenza vaccination.
The risk is up to 12 times greater
for several weeks after the shot.
But the syndrome also occurs
naturally among people who are
not vaccinated. The CDC found
that half the 1,100 cases of the
syndrome reported nationwide
from October 1976 through
January 1977 involved persons
who did not get swine flu shots.
About 550 persons, half from each
group, died.
Foege stressed that the risks
from inoculation were relatively
small, roughly one in two million,
or 0.5 per million. That is less than
the 0.59 deaths per million caused
by lightning each year, he said.
Foege said six to nine cases of
the syndrome occur naturally in
each million persons annually.
With vaccination, the number is
four per million among persons
aged 18 to 24, but 10 per million
for those over 50. The over-all
death rate is 5 percent of those
who contract the syndrome, but it
is 12.5 percent for those 65 or
older.