Psychology prof reveals ‘where it is’ tonight
By GARY LEY
Of the Emerald
How are your relationships with other
people? Less than satisfactory? Non
existent? If so, the Eugene Public Library is
the place to be tonight at 7:30 p.m.
Stephen Johnson, University associate
professor of psychology, will discuss the
problems faced by single adults in their in
teractions with others. His lecture, ‘ The
Mellow Drama of Single Life,” is part of a
series known as "The Thursday Night Affair
at the Library." It is held in the second floor
lecture room.
Johnson’s discussion will cover the high
lights of his book, “First Person Singular":
what he calls "a guide to the single life."
Unmarried relationships can be fulfilling
Published in May, 1976, the first chapter
of the book will be printed in the December
issue of Cosmopolitan. A German transla
tion also is being printed.
Johnson outlines three major areas the
single adult must handle to have fulfilling
relationships. The first is separation. A per
son on his own is faced with separation
from his home, family, lovers or friends.
Such separation has to be accepted in
order to successfully relate to others.
Johnson feels the most important thing a
single adult has to face is loneliness. ‘‘You
can’t run away from it. You have to stay and
deal with it," he said.
Another area of concern to Johnson is
the single person's relationships with
others. What qualities are necessary for
good relationships and how relationships
can be improved are questions he also will
discuss.
Through chapters on matters such as
sex, dating and the forming of new relation
ships, Johnson’s book tries to give the
reader the skills necessary to have suc
cessful and meaningful relationships.
According to Johnson, such skills are no
thing special. “Being a good communicator
or being good at sex is like being able to
play tennis well,” he says.
“Just because you’re a lousy tennis
player or communicator doesn’t mean it’s
the end of the world. People have to realize
not only how to do it, but that it is safe to do
it.”
Johnson says he believes relationships
in society are characterized by negotiation.
“Social mores have been broken down and
everything is up for negotiation from
whether you’ll meet a person to whether
you’ll sleep with him.”
One thing Johnson emphasizes is while
social skills are important, it is vital to realize
they aren’t, in his words, “where it is”.
Through such a realization “the energy is
taken off” such skills and they are more
attainable and less forboding, he said.
Okay then what exactly is “where il is”?
Johnson smiles and says, “I’ll answer that
Thursday night.”
Older pal program provides role model
ay uziljn ijILMUHt
Of the Emerald
Tobin and his brother Kyle are
chasing each other around the liv
ing room. Soon they both fall,
giggling, onto the sofa.
Happy expectancy shows on
Tobin’s face. This nine-year-old is
waiting for a very special friend.
Ron Leventhal, a sociology
major and outdoorsman, checks
his watch again and walks toward
the house. He is greeted by Tobin
as he rushes out the front door.
"Are you ready?” Leventhal asks.
Tobin nods enthusiastically,
“Yea!”
The relationship between
Leventhal and Tobin has matured
over the past six months.
Leventhal is Tobin’s "big brother
Cam Shuford. the campus
coordinator for the Big Brother/
Big Sister program says one of the
main things a big brother or sister
does is provide the child with a
role model. It sounds threatening,
but Leventhal looks at it a bit dif
ferently.
He became interested in the
program by closely observing the
relationship between a good
fnend and her little sister.
He saw the positive interaction
and sharing that developed bet
ween them. With a bit of prodding
from the former program director,
Leventhal decided to go through
Family housing
leaders named
Project directors for the
University’s Westmoreland and
Amazon family housing units were
named Wednesday.
Appointed to the new positions
in the housing department were
Suzanne Tamiesie and Willy Hart.
According to Don Lee, Univer
sity associate director of housing,
Tamiesie will serve as resident
manager of the Westmoreland
complex and Hart will be assigned
to a similar post for the Amazon
complex.
the very careful and thorough
screening process that matches
up big brothers / sisters to children
from single parent homes.
On the day he met Tobin there
was a spontaneous communion.
During his time with Tobin, they
started out spending four or five
hours a week together and now
share 12 to 14 hours.
Leventhal has learned more
about himself and gained another
perspective on life.
Initially he was hesitant about
committing himself — what did he
have to offer? But Leventhal has
since come to believe the more
you give of yourself, the more your
potential to give and receive ex
pands.
He also says by grounding
yourself in a program like this, you
become more aware and useful to
your community.
It is so easy sometimes to stay
in your own limited space and not
stretch yourself to help someone,
but the reward of reaching out to a
child who needs you is a very spe
cial sense of satisfaction, he said.
Then, too, they just have fun to
gether. Typical days together in
clude swimming, running around
in the park, skate boarding, bicycl
ing, hiking, fishing — anything the
two mutually decide they want to
do.
Within the program there are
various outings and Christmas
and Halloween parties. Even the
big sisters and brothers go on re
treats and outings.
The program is a good way to
get in touch with the community
and people who are interested in
helping children and themselves
become an integral part of this
community, Leventhal said.
In no way is this program to be
confused with glorified babysit
ting. A big brother or sister is gain
ing from the experience too, says
Hair Loft ***■■»
fbt* Men and Ubmen
If your hair could talk...
t
would tell you it's gone through a lot this summer.
Sun, salt and chlorine really take their toll on even the
healthiest hair. The great people at the Hairloft know
how to listen — to you and to your hair. Whatever your
hair needs to get back in great shape, you’ll find at the
Hairloft.
If your hair could talk, it would tell you to head for the
Hairloft!
606-1496
2033 Willamette
(Acrouhvm&e
405-1202
lZ39AUer
(acxv»brcn
to/octd Heart)
464-2565
1461 E. 19**
(nett door to toe
(jiWtOrirvter)
Leventhal. You are functioning in
an important role for a child
through this program, he says.
There is a fine line between
being a substitute parent and
being a big brother or sister. You
are definitely on the outside of the
family and, according to
Leventhal, that’s the best place to
be. You don’t tell the child what to
do, but you act as a resource,
someone with a little distance
from the situation.
A big brother/sister also helps
give a child from a single parent
home a sense of balance by offer
ing them a different perspective.
Right now Leventhal says there
is a real need in the program for
big brothers. “If you have some
free time, why not include a kid in
it?”, he said.
13th & Kincaid
Prices
good thru Oct. 8
Luxo Lamps
reg $19.95
now $13.49
BOOKSTORE
UNITED STATES AIR FORCE
RESERVE OFFICERS’ TRAINING CORPS
The US Air Force needs highly qualified, dedicated officers... both men and women... in all kinds of
educational disciplines. Air Force ROTC offers 4,3, and 2 year programs (and scholarships). Contrary
to what some people think, there is no military obligation before the last two years of the Air Force
ROTC.
FRESHMEN AND SOPHOMORES can register for Aerospace Studies classes (1 credit hour) during
normal registration or by adding AS 121/AS 221 by Oct. 14.
If you are ready to look over the horizon into your future, come visit me or talk to some of our cadets.
YouTI be glad you did.
Captain Don Travis 1675 Agate St. — near the dorms 686-3107