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Weekend Review
By CHRIS HOUGLUM
Of the Emerald
There’s a mighty offensive
film packing them in at Oakway
Cinema these days. A side-split
ter called “Three in the Attic.”
Supersaturated with gray ema
nations— paean to man-child
horseplay, that much-lauded as
pect of fraternity life. Held over
by popular demand. JESUS.
Dig this (it'll keep ya laugh
ing, I swear to God). We zoom
in on this self-satisfied stud
(Christopher Jones) who is
Champion Make-Out Artist of
the Theta Chi chapter of a small
Eastern men’s college. Had fifty
women by the time he was a
sophomore, and now commands
the unbounded respect of his
brothers. Do you think they
maybe have an honorary plaque
with his name on it in the house
living room? A perpetual possi
bility, the way this guy moves.
Ethnic Girl Friends
Anyway, we have this too-cute,
super cool, baby-faced superstud
moving in on three girls from
a neighboring women’s college.
Yvette Mimieux is Target. One,
followed in rapid succession by
Maggie Thrett (a lovely Ne
gress with a honeyed Southern
accent and a predilection for
calling our hero "boy ’), and
Judy Pace, a Jewish semi-hippie
who manages to play down her
inhibitions and give way to her
ID.
But that isn’t all. Do you
know what’s most beautiful
about this situation? Our boy
can give the time to all three
of these lovelies without falling
prey to that plague of fraterni
ties worldwide — conscience.
You know—no desire to settle
down (that involves responsi
bility, which is anathema); only
the bill to maintain some kind
of momentum through gratifica
tion. Beautifully simple.
‘Generosity Plus’
So a day to day routine emer
ges as Jones digs in lor the
longest period of artifically-con
structed adolescence in history.
Prove your masculinity in ap
proved fashion: lift a few with
the boys, be cool with the girls
until they really WANT it, at
which time you may GIVE it
to them—an exercise in virtue,
of course. Generosity plus.
But this lovely vision crum
bles. Alas.
In a pretty up-beat sequence,
our three female put-upons, who
have previously acted in the
manner of little girls whose cra
niums are filled with cotton
candy, find out that Superfrat
is not the exclusive property of
anybody. They put their heads
together. They hatch a plot.
And they wind up imprisoning
the darling of Theta Chi in the
attic of their campus residence.
With the idea of giving him
everything he wants until he is
—-ER—used up.
Fraternity Ideal
It would be really great if
they left this embodiment of
the fraternity ideal in his make
shift prison until he promised to
join the Youth International
Party, foresake his sports jack
et for a turtleneck sweater and
his cordovans for Jesus sneakers,
honor and venerate Steppen -
wolf, and resist the draft.
As it turns out, however, the
dean of women gets wind of the
deal, our hostage is freed (after
i
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a few complications ensue and
he spends some time in the
hospital), and things wind up
pretty ducky. Jones joins up
with Mimieux on something of
a permanent basis, and it may
be conjectured that he will be
come an exec and do everything
society demands of him.
This depressing prospect is
perhaps the most cheerful as
pect of a movie which features
lines like “Seven nights a week?
You’re lucky it didn’t fall off,
honey.” Jones and his female
co-stars slip easily into their re
spective roles, but indulge in so
much horseplay that they
emerge looking less like profes
sional actors than a series of
poses. Perhaps this whole film
is just a pose.
And you’d better like it that
way. If you can’t laugh at THIS
film, you’re SICK.
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Sing Along
In the Rollicking Atmosphere of
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