Style of Invitations Set by Tradition
By PATSY A(JFRANC
Staff Writer
As the months draw nearer and
nearer to the wedding day many
questions arise as to the correct
way to go about publicizing the
engagement and or wedding an
nouncement ana the issuing of
wedding invitations. There is no
need for panic or confusion if
things are investigated early, and
the decisions are made and ad
hered to
The bride should consult the
society editor of the papers in
which she wishes to place her
engagement announcement From
them she can find the correct pro
cedure to publicize her engage
ment. It is usuully a good idea
to warn the groom ahead of
time that his name is going to be
in the papers!
The problems of wedding invi
tat ions and announcements de
penu on good timing and the for
mality of the wedding Three
Jewish Rites
Descended From
Long Tradition
Centuries of tradition form the
background of the Orthodox
Jewish wedding
Formai, large weddings are
often held in hotels, clubs, or ban
quet halls os it is the custom that
the weddings should be accompa
nied by feasts and dancing.
In accordance with the Orien
tal tradition of covering the head,
all men guests are required to
wear small silk hats called yar
mulkes at an informal wedding
and the men of the wedding party
wear tall silk hats at a for
nal wedding
The face of the woman must
also be covered and it is cus
tomary for the bride to wear a
veil even if she is married in
a street dress.
The wedding procession is
usually led by the groom, who
enters, accompanied by his fa
ther and mother. The bride fol
lows, also, with her parents
This custom is sometimes modi- '
fled so the bride enters on the 1
arm of her father and the groom
with his mother. The bride is j
never formally given away by
her father, nor does he take part
in the ceremony, except as an es
court.
Traditionally, no Jewish bride
is really married unless she has
been married under a canopy, 1
or chuppah. The chuppah is an
embroidered square of white silk
or satin, supported by velvet cov
ered poles. The canopy is carried
by the men of the wedding party
and other male relatives.
Although it is not an obligatory
part of the ceremony, many con
sider the wine-cup ceremony to be
the most interesting rite connect
ed with the Jewish wedding.
Two cups of wine are placed
on a small table. After the bless
ing. the rabbi hands one of the
cups to the groom, who sips it
and passes it in turn to the
bride. Following the wine cere
mony, the groom places a plain
gold band on the bride’s fore
finger.
After the rabbi's sermon, the
bride and groom drink the second
cup of wine. The groom takes the
cup front the rabbi, places it on
the floor and crushes the cup
with his heel.
This is the final step in the
ceremony. Some authorities say
that it means the marriage will
last until the shattered pieces of
glass can be reunited, while oth
ers feel it is based on the an
cient superstition that an evil
presence must be placated with
a gift of wine.
BRIDAL VEIL
A bridal crown and veil should
be cnosen with the same care
giv en to gown selection. They can
enhance the shape of the bride’s
face anil serve as a final crowning
touch to the wedding ensemble.
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months before the wedding the
prospective bride should reach a
decision on the si/.e of the wed
ding- As soon as the decision
has been made as to the type
of wedding it will be, the bride
and her family, in consultation
with the groom and his parents,
should make out the list of per
sons to be invited
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It is up to the bride's par
ents to issue the invitations, and
therefore close contact should
be kept with the groom’s fam
1 lly to make sure the names and
addresses of their guests are un
derstood and checked for possible
duplication with the bride's list.
If the guest list is limited,
the bride will need to compile a
second list of persons to whom
her family and the groom’s wish
to send announcements because
it was impossible to invite them
: to attend the wedding. These an
nouncements are sent immediate
ly after the wedding.
When the wedding is a small
| one, either in the home or an in
formal chapel, the members of
. the immediate family and close
friends may be invited person
ally by the bride or her mother,
by word of mouth, telephone, tel
egraph, or informal note, which
; ever is convenient.
If over 50 guests are to be in
vited to the wedding, formal en
graved invitations are sent, re
gardless of the formality of the
wedding.
All members of the wedding
' party should receive invitations
and their mates’ names are in
cluded. It is usually proper to
invite the fiance and the par
’ ents of the attendants, also.
A personal invitation is always
given to the minister and his
wife to attend the reception if
there is to be one. The bride’s
mother usually does this by word
of mouth and does not mail a
formal invitation to them.
Two months before the wed
ding the bride should get in
touch with an engraver and select
the engraved wedding invitations
- and or announcements. The or
der should be placed at least six
weeks before the mailing date.
Outside envelopes in the quan
tity decided upon may often be
obtained from the engraver a*
the time the order is placed.
This way the addressing may
be done at home before the en
graving is completed. This will
save time when things are be
coming rushed toward the begin*
ning of the last month.
Conflicting and often confusing
problems may arise when choos
ing the correct wording and in
sertion for the wedding an
nouncements. It is important to
remember that the formality oi'
engraved wedding invitations de
mand equal formal wording. This
formality includes writing the
names out in full, without ini
tials or abbreviations. The date,
time, place, and request for re
ply are also written formally.
Invitations are always issued
in the name of the bride’s par
ents, even if she lives away from
home. Her guardian, a close
relative or a family friend may
sponsor the wedding if her par
ents are not living. If one parent
is living, the invitations are
worded in the singular, and if her
parents are divorced, the parent
with whom she lives sponsors the
invitation. A stepparent’s name
may appear on the invitation,
often followed by a “his (or her)
daughter" to indicate relation
ship.
Reception cards are sent tp
those guests who are to be in
. vited unless all the guests are in
vited to both the ceremony and
the reception. In such cases, the
place of the reception is added to
the wedding invitation.
Three to four weeks before the
ceremony, the invitations should
be completed and mailed out. If
; wedding announcements are to
be sent, the bride's parents should
wait until the ceremony has been
performed before mailing them.
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