‘Shocking and Astounding’
The recent disclosures by The Kphemer
ald and the Office of Student Affairs of
Standards depravity existing among the
women of the University are enough to
shock and astound even the most hardened
white slaver. We, who have long held the
smug position that nothing is wrong with
Oregon co-eds, are now outraged—as well
as disappointed at being left out of the fun
tor so long.
The list of offenses against our (speaking
in the general. University sense) finer sen
sibilities is far too long to be here discussed
and commented upon extensively. But
touching upon a few "high points" should
illustrate what we have in mind about
campus women.
• Senior co-eds have late privileges dur
ing spring term. It doesn't take much
imagination to figure out just why senior
girls demanded and got such late privileges.
After all, the library is closed after JO p.m.
There is no good reason why senior girls
should be allowed to roam the streets until
after 11 p.nr. on weeknights.
• Graduate students (female) and mar
ried women undergraduates are allowed to
live in unsupervised off-campus housing.
This is a definite loop-hole in the Adminis
tration's housing policy which should not be
allowed to stand. These women, no older
in age or experience than other normal
co-eds, should be required to live on-campus
for the necessary social training.
• Unsupervised afternoon and especially
evening coffee dates are allowed—often
with both males and females sitting on the
same side of the booth. The possibilities of
nefarious under-the-table dealings are too
strong to overlook.
• Women’s living organizations employ
males. These houseboys. as they are called,
supposedly work in the groups’ kitchens
and dining rooms. Something should definit
ely be done either to secure female employes
or to the present houseboys'to clear up
these unseemjy, and heretofore undisclosed,
situations.
• Kissing—between males and females—
is still persisting on front porches of wom
en's living organizations (and elsewhere).
This, in spite of the already-vigilant Ad
ministration efforts to stamp out such prac
tices. Every thinking University student
need but think for a moment at what such
activities could, and most likely already
have, led to.
• Sorority beau rooms and dormitory
lobbies have been disgraceful, particularly
just before evening lock-ui>. The Dean of
Women has reported that the Mothers’
Clubs, after certain mothers had witnessed
some frenzied front porch love-making, are
up in arms in their demands that such fool
ishness cease. One mother, when asked if
she didn't remember what she did when she
was young, snapped, “Yes, and that’s jnst
what worries me so.”
• Co-eds have been sighted on campus in
clothing which exposes as much as an inch
above their knees. The prime violators, it is
here noted, are the girls who persist in
wearing short shorts. The impact of so
much exposed flesh on impressionable Uni
versity males is not to be discounted.
• Sparkling water has been discovered in
the punch at several sorority house dances.
Strong beverages, according to leading
health authorities, is the third partner in a
sinister triad. (The other two, for those who
don’t already know them, are single-dating
and parking.) We’ve always maintained
that it is possible to have a good time w ith
a girl without strong drink—which only
saps one’s needed energy, anyway.
The above indictments are only a sketchy
listing of the current campus violations of
women’s Standards. Even the most severe
regulations—currently being tried by the
Administration—have not seemed to cor
rem: the basically outrageous situation.
The Ephemerald's proposal to correct
this situation is simple. A no-male “dry
zone” around all women’s living organiza
tions is definitely the answer. Very simply,
such a "zone” would keep all University
males from approaching women’s living or
ganizations closer than one block.
This plan would serve several purposes.
The male “dry zone” would eliminate the
hot spots of current Standards violations. It
would insure that male students—- the
backbone of the academic University—are
allowed to pursue their studies without the
detracting influence of having to worry
about their inter-relations with co-eds. (The
North and South Eugene High School
Townie Associations, strangely enough, also
heartily endorse these proposals.)
Since co-eds would thus be denied most
of their opportunities to fraternize with male
students, it is likely that, under the plan,
many of them would drop out of school to
search for better hunting grounds. By this
means the real source of women’s Stand
ards violations would be eliminated. We
sincerely hope the Heads of Houses will
consider our indictments and our proposals.
April Fool, Kiddies
Wait just a minute! Before you cancel
your subscription, sue for libel or storm
Allen Hall with murder in your eye, take a
good look at the calendar. It’s the first of
April, isn’t it? And traditionally (since last
year) on this hallowed date, the Oregon
Daily Ephemerald mysteriously appears on
campus. This issue is the second annual
Oregon Daily Ephemerald, written and
sponsored by the men of Sigma Delta Chi,
men’s professional journalism fraternity.
(All libel suits should be addressed to our
loyal and fearless adviser, John L. Hulteng,
who was last seen rapidly leaving campus
muttering incoherently under his breath.)
We really mean no lasting harm with this
year's Ephemerald—it’s just that after a
year of writing straight news and attempt
ing to follow the principles of good journa
lism, the temptation runs strong to turn to
the completely frivolous.
We hope you’ll find something in these
pages to tickle your fancy or perhaps to
show some old problems in a new light. If
we do either, or both, (besides meeting our
budget) we’ll consider the 1958 Ephemerald
some kind of success.
Educational Reaction
We are indeed alarmed at the curriculum
changes recently made in the School of
Education. Several established courses in
cluding Elements of Life Adjustment,
Teaching of Social Living, Seminar in
Keeping the Gifted Child in His Place and
Teaching Driver Training, have been
scuttled.
With the emphasis of modern education
on adjusting pupils to life, thus perpetrating
the near-perfect status quo, such reactionary
moves as returning to educational funda
mentals can only cause unnecessary humilia
tion for the School of Education faculty—as
well as for the “faculty” of the Athletic De
partment, which depends on the School of
Education to pull many of the University’s
star athletes through school.
We share Dean Jacobson’s hope that the
curriculum changes will be temporary.
; > i • i i i i i i i i i
Rights of Spring
1
sflj-K
|! 9
i&’S'HWW
i ,®Hfl Qs
Letters to the Editor
Ephemerald Editor:
Just a note to all my friends
back at Oregon, in case they
don't know how to get copies of
the Berea News, the paper
which I now put out back here
just 40 miles north of Heaven
(Wooster to you). Anyway, be
fore I open my mouth too wide
ly, I'll pass along the good news.
Bob "Whipple-Dipple" has open
ed a circulation bureau in the
graduate room of the School of
Journalism (of which 1'rri a mas
ter of, in, because, somehow).
Buy r.ow, and fill the vacuum.
Rnji \V. Adams
Persona Non (irata
Kphemerald Editor:
I would like to clear up a mat
ter that has come to my atten
tion recently and that would
take a bit of explanation from
me to explain. That is to say
that the matter is of such a na
ture that only one person in
the world can answer it and
that one person is me.
That is to say, that the mat
ter is a question that has been
asked by at least one person
and a person in my status in life
has to be careful to answer ail
questions and to clarify my
stands. (Also to clarify the
spelling of my name, you blith
ering idiots. It’s ‘'ley,” even in
your yellow rag.)
The question, as was phrased
by my questioner, is “Why
haven't you written many let
ters to the editors?” The an
swer is, of course, obvious to
anyone who has seen my letters
elsewhere...
Edward N. Kadeley
More-or-lcss District
Attorney Candidate
(Editor’s Note: The remainder
of Mr. Kadeley‘s letter, all 12
pages of it, is on file in The
Epliemerald archives and may
be read by any interested per
son.)
Ephemerald Editor:
I don’t care what youse guys
say, advertising is the basis of
our paper. Now, if we make the
front page all advertising, we
can double our take ...
Gary Clapps
Bill Bryant
Emerald Hucksters
P S. We refer you to Jack W il
son’s recent columns to support
our position.
Ephemerald Editor:
. .. You know, Cook may have
something there.
Eeo Harris
Director of Athletics
Ephemerald Editor:
Ah. come on. fellas. Tell Mr.
Venn that I didn’t have any
thing to do with that newspaper.
Please ?
■Iidin I.. Hultcng
E*-NDX \dvU.»r
Eugene City .fail
Ephemerald Editor:
Because we have searched and
searched and found no qualified
wtmen at ;ill (really. Mr. Editor,
they're utterly unqualified! t,owe
have derided not to ^perpetuate
our tradition and are hereby dis
banding after th is ‘year ".('a s s«oon
aa we get our candy cane profits
money split up). WeJleSye; .wag
ging our tassels behind ous»at
your (.hocking women of ”59.
1-aura Morris
Standards Chairman
Mortar Hoard
Ten Drinking < Inti
Ephemerald Editor:
All the way over here to
Belgium comes the word that
you're at it again! Won’t you
ever learn, you silly, silly boys?
Marcia Mauney
Girl Guide and
Gctnbout
Ephemerald Editor:
The men of Tau Kappa Epsi
lon would like to see justice
done (and we want our broth
erhood’s name in print again).
Our brother fraternities in the
Inter-fraternity Council las
eveiyone knows, but no one re
members often enough), are all
discriminators. Wc aren't. Our
brother fraternities don’t have
Carnation Queens (or even Car
nations). We do (and not just in
January). Our brother fraterni
ties sat and watched the ’o'
disappear. We didn't. We went
to Corvallis and stole it back
(from our TKE brothers over
there l. ;
Editor, w
ting our
that’s no
Little Jimmy Boyd
Tekc Mascot
Oregon Daily Ephemerald
hortunnltly, the Oretfon Daily K hem -
trail) i- put out only one* per annum,
ihereforr prtservina its untune quality >
tM.ical of Sisma Delta Chi efforts. a
JlmiK is, of eourke, only available by .ale,
liartcr, theft or subscription and threatens
to surpass ( onfidciitial in nets depths
of terra cotta journalism. Opinions <\
pressetl herein, henceforth ami forthwith
represent only the fertile minds ,.f SD\
members and their dntina adviser, John I..
( rorr l ilnltella.
FIGHTING STEV E WILSON. Editor
<■ i.. KENT. Manaytna Editor
IIOKAt EfiUEEI.HY. Business Manat
KOHERT HARRISON, News Editor
i LI fiENE VENN. Censor
I.OKEI.EI Kll.ltOI RNE, LOIS I.ANE,
Women's Editors
K It DARI) IK II E, SportB Editor
*0\ ADAMS, Chief t,f Keren Kurta i
SIEVE, Rlil’ER, Photo Bureau