Porchlight
Parade
By ED CAUDURO
With the Stanford weekend but
a menu from Omar Khayyam’s
and a towel from the St. Francis,
the campus is once again aglow
with a hectic madness reminis
cent of registration week. . . .
Joe College has resumed his nor
mal practice of chasing frosh
coeds while partner Betty takes
backflips down 13th to build up
her activity points . . . On every
one’s mind and. tongue is the
Michigan game this Saturday, and
an unswerving belief that the
mighty Wcbfoots will hang a de
feat on the Wolverines.
Watziz about DG Carol Eagle
son celebrating her birthday with
Beta troubles? . . . The blinding
light the “characters” at the art
school have been harrassed by of
late is the rock on Alpha Chi Liz
Kelley’s third finger left, cour
tesy of SAE’s Warren Ritchie.
Kappa Barb MeClintock was
wearing a fetching starry-eyed
look last week, due mostly to the
presence of Phil Welling on cam
pus after a term with Uncle Sam
. . . Most intriguing- question of
the week: Is, or is not, the Gam
ma Phi fire escape still wired for
sound? We offer a toast (of ar
senic and ground glass) to the
rally squad, what enthusiasm!
Suggest some kind rooter furnish
them witli pom poms and adrena
lin for the next game . . . The in
evitable has happened with the
“brassing” of the DG’s Virginia
Cassavan( by Phi Psi Don Boots.
Cass was greeted with the tradi
tional Phi Psicrating Monday eve
. . . Dotty Madden and Annie Fen
wick are scouring the campus
with rather grim; determined
looks of late. Seems they just
heard there were two for every
girl, and are out to get their quo
ta before the rains come . . .
. . . Football preview at the rally
last Thursday saw Gammafie
,(ean Swift substituting for Nancy
Swem who was delayed at the
president’s reception. “Swlfty”
intercepted “Gorgeous George”
Bell’s pass intended for Swem but
there was a penalty on the play
for too much time in the huddle
. . . Theta Leslie Too'/.e and Chi
Psi Tom McLouglilin seen check
in-cheeking at Willamette park.
The Fijis appeared to be holding
\ house meeting at this same bun
ion palace . . . who’s the obedient
pledge who brings hamburgers
ind shakes to the DGs and Thetas
after hours? . . .
Down South, alum Kay Schnei
der, sporting a Woody Woodpeck
er hairdo, invited everyone to her
shindig . . . On the home front
party honors go to Mr. and Mrs.
Larry Lau (blended Sept. 41
where they stacked 4(> people into
a two-room apartment for a “lis
tening- party" that jingled until
the wee hours . . . understand that
Pete Miller was given a room at
a nice hotel down South that was
to have been reserved for Tom
Dewey.
Dewey and his entourage un
expectedly appeared and the man
agement tried to move Pete. Pete,
we hear, told th management to
move Tom Dewey ... At this
writing', neither KITGN, KORE
nor KASH has plans to broadcast
the Mich.-Ore. game. KOJN will
carry it over CBS, but who can
get KOIN down here ? Has been
suggested that Webfoots make
many, many phone calls and let
’em know there are better times
for organ music than 11 a.m. Sat
urday. KORE has the nerve to
give us as a substitute, the WSC
Stanford game. What say. kids
.. . can they do that to us ? ? ?
Lecture Series Courtesy
Yarietv is proverbially the spice of life and the University
assembly committee, under the chairmanship of Dr. Dan E.
Clark, is bringing that very thing to the campus this year.
During the five lectures scheduled for the year, students will
hear the opinions and comments of an economist, an authority
on Germany, an author, a woman industrialist, and a newspaper
correspondent.
One of the outstanding features of the assemblies is the
question-and-answer period which usually follows each talk,
during which the audience gets a chance at rebuttal and an
opportunity to gain further information.
The expressed opinions of the speakers don't always corres
pond with the opinions of the students and townspeople who
come to listen. Last year such controversial figures as Norman
Thomas, Louis Adamic, and Henry Wallace appeared in Mac
court, and except for one isolated instance of discourtesy to a
presidential aspirant, the speakers drew large audiences and
courteous attention. The students remembered that the speak
ers were the guests of the University and should be treated as
such.
Although the speakers this year may not be so controver
sial, they may have ideas that everyone doesn't accept. But the
“guest theory” still holds. B. B.
• • •
From Other Editors
(From the Daily Iowan)
Among- the literature that arrives at a newspaper’s desk
comes a report from an encyclopedia publisher.
These people have listed as the most memorable date in
man’s history either August 6, 1945, or July 16, 1945. In August,
a bomber dropped an atom bomb on Hiroshima. The July date
was the first Los Alamos blast of an atomic bomb.
That first date, they say, marked the atom as the most ter
rifving of man's weapons. And as weapons are developed so are
counter-weapons developed.
Ilut here is where their report goes astray—it says that the
atom bomb has a counter-weapon : the Geiger counter.
As a mere pun, that statement may be acceptable. But while
the rifle developed trenches and armor had brought out the
gasmask, the atom bomb has not yet produced a defense for the
implications of an atom blast.
Probably this is the time in the history of man that we must
stop looking for a physical device to counter weapons of war.
This is the time when we have turned the very basis of our
science into a labor of destruction.
This is the time, when lacking an anti-weapon, we must use
all agencies to prevent a war.
In MY Opinion..
-From Our Readers
U
To the Editor:
At times during the school
year, various students find them
selves confronted by scholastic,
financial or emotional situations
which seem very discouraging,
and sometimes, insurmountable.
Often there is a tendency to in
voke self-pity or assume a mar
tyr’s role. Such an attitude may
or may not be justified, but by
way of finding “balm in Gilead,”
(in advance) consider some of the
students enrolled at the U. of O.
who constantly labor under a phy
sical handicap which might com
pletely overcome many others.
When you possess 2.0-20 vision,
the usual number of arms and leg's
and have no serious physcial de
fects showing, count yourself for
tunate. Not everyone is so lucky.
If those students who seek a
higher education in spite of their
handicap have the courageous
ambition to spot you ten and still
play for even money, it behooves
the rest of us to ponder their for
titude and strive just as diligent
ly. Generally speaking, we’re
pretty lucky people—and don’t
always know it. It can always get
worse.
W. E. Clothier
To the Editor:
I believe you are in a position
to render a great service to a
large number of students here at
the University of Oregon. This
service being the formation of
dancing classes for the instruc
tion of students only.
There are many people who
ha\*> never learned to dance for
one reason or another and I'm
sure you’ll agree with me when
I say they are missing one of the
major pleasures of a college edu
cation.
These classes could be held at
one of several places on the cam
pus. If such classes are all ready
set up. a notice of time and place
in your paper would be greatly
appreciated. I’m sure something
can be done to remedy this situa
tion.
A Student
Oregon
Emerald
The Oreoox Daily F.mfrai.d, published daily during the college year except Sundays,
Mondays.^ holidays. and final examination peri oils by the Associated Students, University of
Oregon. Subscription rates: per term and $4.00 per year. Entered as second-class matter
at the postotfice. Eugene, Oregon.
Bill. Y ATKS. Kditor
Don Fair. Managing FJitor
YIRlilL TUCKER, Business Manager
Tom McLaughlin, Adv. Manager
-Carnival
A Little Story About an Unholy
Desire to Laugh at a Funeral
By BARBARA HEYWOOD
At her grandfathers funeral
young Mrs. Vincent was plagued
by a most unholy desire to laugh.
She felt it first when she
walked into the funeral parlor
and looked at the floral wreaths
surrounding his coffin. Most os
tentatious was a large wreath
presented by his lodge. It was
made of red and white carnations
and shaped like a large horseshoe.
Very appropriate, the horseshoe
was, she thought; the old boy had
had lots of kick in him. And then
the laughter welled up.
Disturbed, she tried to think
pious thoughts, but the laughter
still wiggled and kicked deep
down in her chest. It was no feel
ing of warm humor; it was knife
like.
In the semi-screened room for
relatives she chose a seat next to
Aunt Margaret and watched the
friends of the deceased file in.
They were mostly women it
seemed, though grandfather had
been a man’s man. They pussy
footed, tiptoed along, cautiously,
as if they were afraid Grandfath
er might be waked up and reach
out and trip them. (Those black
hats they wore! thought young
Mrs. Vincent. Somebody must
have sat on them at one time or
another.) The friends’ faces grew
studiously longer as they reached
the coffin, and they dabbed at
their eyes with hankies drown
from their bosoms.
Then Mrs. Finley tripped on a
loose corner of the carpet—just
as if grandfather had reached out.
Young Mrs. Vincent choked and
put her handkerchief over her
face. Aunt Margaret patted her
hand quietly.
The minister's sermon was
bland—quite out of keeping with
grandfather.
“Our brother was with us long,’’
he said. “During his sojourn in
this vale of tears he respected
God and man. . . .”
His granddaughter shuddered
with rising laughter, for the pic
ture of grandfather and the min
ister sitting on the front porch
one hot morning rose before her.
Grandfather wras deliberately
trying to make the minister an
gry. He blasphemed all forms of
religion, and with his criss-cross
logic proved that the world had
created God: God, who is a myth
to give integration to a confused
bunch of humans running helter
skelter on a big molten-centered
sphere.
The minister had looked round
eyed and sad. You just couldn't
win an argument with grandfath
er. Later that very same day
grandfather had proved to an
atheistic feed peddler that there
WAS a God.
“. . . Our brother husbanded his
farm well. He was a respected
member of his community—kind
to his family, kind even to his ani
mals. . . .”
Young Mrs. Vincent saw grand
father in his chicken yard zest
fully chopping off the head of
Mussolini, the pet rooster. Mus
solini squawked, shrieked, shud
dered and died. Grandfather had
seemed to be enjoying himself
immensely.
The laughter was becoming
overpowering. Immediately the
sermon was over young Mrs. Vin
cent hurried out the back way.
Now she could laugh. She opened
her mouth for a full-bodied laugh,
but of its own accord, her mouth
pulled back into a grimace. She
was sobbing.
" The Political Front
Little Mud-Slinging Detected
Thus Far In Political Campaiqn
By VENITA HOWARD
Let's face it; whether we like
it or not 1948 is another election
year. And, election years being
what they are it’s going to be
hard to pick up a newspaper, lis
ten to the radio or go to a movie
without coming face to face with
a maze of campaign promises and
warnings.
The Republicans are stomping
all over the country promising
that there will be som changes
when they take over the
SVhite HQU§ii’
Dewey nas aiso said that a west
erner will get a cabinet post and
Oregonians are now beginning to
speculate on the chances that a
favorite son might get the ap
pointment. A story from Bend has
it that Robert W. Sawyer, Bend
publisher, might be the man for
secretary of interior post.
Thus far in the campaign there
has been very little mud-slinging.
The GOP, its treasury filled to
the brim with campaign funds and
its leaders assured of'an almost
certain November victory, seems
to be set on winning the election
on one major promise: It’s time
the voters gave the Democrats
the heave-ho so that Washington
can get a good house-cleaning
from top to bottom.
Because of their so-called as
sured victory, perhaps the Repub
licans feel that there is no need
to sling mud as was done when
Dewey had to campaign against
the popular FDR. Certainly the
man holding the little end of a big
stick this year is Harry Truman.
In all the hub-bub concerning
the two presidential aspirants, it
is sometimes hard to remember
that there is a second man on the
ticket, but not so this year. Earl
Warren and Alben Barkley are
both making arduous campaign
trips, though Barkley will limit
his campaign to the East while
Warren is traveling from Califor
nia to New York via Salt Lake,
Tulsa, St. Louis, and Detroit.
Interesting to note while pon
dering the question of why there
has been so little mud-slinging
on the part of the Republicans is
the speech Warren made in open
ing his campaign in Salt Lake
City. In an almost nonpartisan
manner Warren told Salt Lakers
that the real problems facing the
U.S. could not be blamed “on any
one individual, any political par
ty or any national administra
tion.” “Good Americans are to be
found in both parties,” Warren
said, and, “party affiliation does
not change human instincts or
affect loyalty . . o” Warren went
on to say that “no party has a
patent on progress, a copyright
on governmental principles or a
proprietary interest in the ad
vances made in former days.”
If this trend of no-mud-slinging
continues election years may
eventually become just another
year and news of campaign prom
ises and warnings may be rele
gated to the inside pages of
newspapers . . . then think of all
the lost topics for arguments and
bull sessions after hours. Of
course, there's always commu
nism, Wallace and Schmoos.