PAGE - Treat for Astri By Randi Raanes The dreary dawn slanted through the half-drawn shade as my moth er called me. “At last the day has come,” I thought, and immediately I has tened to pull on my clothes and dash downstairs. I flew through breakfast as though it were merely an unim portant grace-note in a great so nata. Then I dived for the mop and dust-rag and began to clean the front room. This was unusual for me. Most of the time I was the world’s greatest procrastinator concerning the task of dusting. The thought of bending over and shoving dust out of little corners had always made me shudder. It was just too much like work. But as I furiously attacked the dust on the piano legs, I reflected that this once I had a special reason for wanting to clean the house. One of the greatest days of my life was no longer in the distant future, but was present. My aunt, my mother’s only sister, was com ing from Norway. And she was going to live with us. Thoughts of Reunion I had not seen Astri for a num ber of years. She had gone to Eng land when we came to America. It would be so wonderful to see my favorite aunt again. I knew she would think me quite grown up. I was almost 11 years old. As I banged the dust-rag across the piano keys, I wondered what I would do to entertain her. The question constituted a prob lem. -It did not occur to me that she was quite capable of enter —lining herself. I was grappling with the question of what to do, as I began to dust off the albums on the shelf of the coffee table. My hand and eye hesitated on my recently completed album. That was it. I would show Astri my album. It would interest her a great deal, I knew. There were many pictures which had been taken in Norway while she was still there with us, but they had not been in the album when she saw them. I wanted her to see the exact system I had used in enter ing and labeling the pictures. Be sides, there were many pictures taken from my school days and vacations, and Astri would enjoy those because she was so inter ested in me. Yes, I would show her my album. Carefully I dusted it. Then I took all of the loose papers and birthday and Christmas cards out * Of it and placed it back on its shelf on the coffee table. Solution With the entertainment problem solved, I industriously tackled the dining-room table legs with my chamois. At the lunch table I could not eat. I had been working hard all morning, but my excitement would simply not allow me to swallow more than a few bits of carrot salad and a half glass of milk. My mother was distressed at my sudden loss of appetite. “But, Randi,” she cried, “you must eat. You cannot go until supper-time without food. That will not do.” “I can't eat,” I protested, and in my excitement I began to cry. Mother became slightly angry. “Now, don’t be that way. If you are going to be like that, you will have to stay home and wait for us. - We cannot have a whiny little girl along to greet Astri.” Ashamedly I sniffed away my tears and remembered that actual Jy I was quite old, and grown-ups didn’t cry about little things, not even when they were so nervous and excited. After an eternity of face-scrub bing and hair-combing and then attempting to practice my piano lesson while waiting for my par ents to get ready, we started off to the depot. The weather was not at all what it should have been on such a joyous occasion. The rain drizzled down and made the day seem quite miserable. I fer vently hoped that Astri didn’t mind rain. Then I convinced my self that she wouldn’t mind be cause she had worked in London, and my memory seemed to recall something about London's wet and foggy climate. I hoped that Lon don was worse than Portland. It took several centuries to ar rive at the train depot. After our arrival, it took several more cen turies for the clock’s hand to drag itself around for 20 minutes. By this time I could hardly breathe from pure nervous excitement. My parents kept telling me to calm down, but I insistently chewed every fingernail to the quick. Then I heard a voice over the loudspeaker. It announced that the train had arrived from the south, and that the passengers were coming in. Fortunately, there were but a few people waiting for the passengers, so I had an un obstructed view of the tracks. Peo ple milled in from the train. I saw many stately ladies walk into the depot but I knew they were not Astri. She would be much more distinguished than any of these. I visualized her in an exquisitely tailored suit, a smart hat, and walking toward us with a calm, self-confident step. “There she is.” My mother said it much too calmly, I thought. Out of the Crowd “Where?” I fairly screamed. I scanned the few persons saunter ing toward us. There was only one outstanding person in view. It was a woman in a huge gray raincoat which was flying out like Dutch man’s breeches, and a small dark hat. A round suitcase was sus pended from her arm and was bouncing all around as she raced across the tracks, arms outstretch ed. “What a clumsy looking wom an,” I thought. “I’m glad she's not Astri.” I turned my attention back to J the other women who were com ing toward us to see if I could dis cover Astri. An agonizing second passed be fore I realized that the woman in the gray raincoat had flung her self at my mother. That clumsy looking woman bouncing the round suitcase was Astri. I was shocked. It wasn’t possi ble. A chill sense of disappoint ment came over me and would not leave. My Astri would never have tumbled across those tracks in so unladylike a way. But she had. When I overcame my sudden shock, I looked at my mother and Astri in their greeting embrace. Then I turned to Daddy, who was standing next to me. “I guess this is where we came in,” I said dully. He must have sensed my disap pointment either by my crestfal len countenance or by my stupid remark. He slowly smiled and squeezed my hand. Daddy en couraged me. I convinced myself that Astri’s clothes and unlady like manner would not affect her character. She was still Astri, no matter what she wore. Evaluation Astri turned and warmly greet ed my father, and then she turned to me. I was fairly shivering with excitement. She gazed at me. Her eyes traveled up and down, up and down. “And so this is the big girl,” she said, with an inflecton that I convinced myself was not deri sive. Sudden bashfulness overcame me. I crowded close to my father There Was No Sound Hearts that laugh at fate are poetry, And 1 have seen his laughter, as swift and silent as the stream by the grove. I have watched him there, stripping the bush of its leaves, turning each over, blowing off a bug, or folding it, or just letting it float in the shallows until the current pulled it down stream. There was no sound, but there was laughter. Eyes with a song are poetry, And I have looked into his eyes as soft and warm as the breeze in the grove. I have followed his glance from the bush to the tree, to the clouds—back to the tree, to the leaves, to the dirt. There was no sound, but his eyes were singing. Calloused hands speak of poetry, And I have watched them toil, as honest hands do, and they built by the grove. I was proud of his hard tanned hands for they moved steadily, with a touch of a flair . . . And his clasp was there, when he plucked the string. Death is the finite song of poetry. No, not for musicians without notes, For poetry can be time and the numbness of time, and in part, love and the vibrance of love—■ But for him, first, they took his hands, then, his eyes— Yet—his laughter.. There had been no sound. —SHIRLEY ANNE PHILLIPS rather than going forward to her. Shyness was not characteristic of me. Usually I was perfectly will ing and happy to speak to strang ers. But when Astri’s eyes ran over me, I wanted to run and hide. The though confused and frieght ened me. As I gulped an unintelli gible answer to her simple state ment, I gave myself a severe si lent scolding for thinking anything but the best of her. I had no rea son to be disappointed in her. While she stared at me, I noticed that she really had a good-looking suit under that raincoat. But the first picture of her flying across the tracks would not leave my mind, no matter how dignified she appeared as she stood by Mother. Suddenly I realized that Astri was still speaking to me. She pull ed something out of a huge gray pocket in her raincoat. It was a turtle. Fascination I stared at the funny little ani man. He was almost as large as Astri’s palm, and his wrinkled legs dangled over her hand. A wrinkled head and neck with wor ried black eyes batting in the light slowly pushed itself out from under an afghan-patterned shell. I was fascinated. “Well, what’s the matter? Don’t you want him?” I heard Astri ask me. “Why—yes—er—can I have him —I—I mean, is it really for me?” I faltered. I was thrilled over the little turtle, but puzzled over As tri’s attitude. She was laughing at me. “Why don’t you take him?” She held out her hand. “Is a big girl like you afraid of a turtle? He won’t bite, you know.” Slowly I took the turtle from her and stood there, just looking at him and batting my eyes as rapidly as he batted his. I wanted to cry, but knew I mustn’t. Nor did I know exactly why I wanted to cry. It somehow seemed that the bottom of the world had drop ped out and that a frightened lit tle turtle and I were left alone. “Can’t you say something?” It was Astri demanding my atten tion. Almost afraid to look up at her, I muttered a thank-you and immediately looked down at the turtle in my hand. He had com pletely withdrawn to the’ safelty of his shell. I envied him. He didn’t have to look at her insistent stares when he didn’t want to. I had no way of escape. On the way home I sat in the corher of the car and watched my turtle. Astri was busily chattering to Mother about our relatives in Norway. I should have been inter ested, but somehow my spirit was deadened. Twice I attempted to make my way into the conversa tion in order to show Astri that I was not a backward, bashful little girl but that I was an in telligent young lady. So far her eyes had plainly showed that she considered me an infant. Conversation Pieces “Where did you get the turtle?” I ventured. “Panama.” And she turned again to Mother. I let Panama run around in my mind for a few minutes and then decided to try again from a dif ferent angle. “I’m going to show you my al bum when we get home.” I felt that this information would please her greatly and that I wouTd re ceive a really encouraging re sponse. She turned to me with an an noyed glance, then turned back to Mother. A hot flush colored my face. Unsuccessfully I tried to hold back the tears. Astri didn’t want to . see my album. Still, I attempt ed to convince myself that per haps she hadn’t heard what I said and was too polite to ask. But I knew I was rationalizing. Tears slipped down my cheeks. I watch ed one splash silently on the tur tle’s shell. Hurriedly I wiped it off with my finger and turned to gaze out the window, wiping the successive tears off my face with the back of my hand. Waiting the Moment When we arrived at home, my enthusiasm and excitement over flowed again. There were many things to show Astri. Much as I wanted to pull out my album im mediately, I decided to wait until after dinner for the great treat. Before dinner Astri and Mother busily unpacked Asri's huge trunk. I stood by in silence, still holding the turtle, who probably felt as frustrated as I. I wanted to help unpack, but no, I was too little to be of any use. I might break something valuable. After a few minutes I went downstairs and watched the lonely turtle plod his way across the thick rug. At dinner, Astri chattered pleas antly about her trip. She appeared to be in a good mood, and even looked at me quite as though I were a contemporary, not an in fant. I decided that she probably had been unhappy because she was hungry, and that now she would be the jolly, loving aunt whom I had pictured in my mind. After Daddy and I washed the dishes, we ventured into the front room, where Mother and Astri were discussing old friends. Quiet ly I perched on the hassock at As tri’s feet. The great treat, my al bum, was within reach. After lis tening to the conversation for what seemed to me an eternity, I pulled the album from the shelf. For several minutes I sat there, delicately balancing the wonderful book on my knees. I hoped that she would speak to me first, that she would ask me what I had on my lap. Then I would modestly ask her if she cared to look at my album. She would be very happy to look at it. Somewhere in my mind a doubt rested, but only for an intsant. I firmly con vinced myself that she wanted me to enter into the conversation by way of the album. Offering Astri did not seem inclined to look toward me, but I could wait no longer. With my newly revived self-confidence, I tenderly lifted the precious album toward her, experienced another fleeting doubt, then boldly spoke. “Would you like to look at my album, Auntie Astri ?” She made no reply. She kept talking to Mother. I realized that I had spoken barely above a whis per. I determined to try again, and this time make myself heard. “Wouldn’t you like to look at my album?” She turned those piercing eyes upon me. “Did you say something, little girl?” Little girl. I gulped. This time I spoke without the assistance of a grain of cinfidence. “1 wonder if you wouldn’t like to look at my album.” “Well, some other day. I want to talk to your mother and father now, so you keep still. And now, isn’t it time for little girls to be in bed?” I felt as though someone had slapped me sharply across the face. My mind numbed. Astri actually didn’t even care if I owned an album. She didn’t want to have anything to do with the great treat I had planned for her. Through the fogginess of my mis ery I heard my father ask me if I wished to go to bed, as Astri suggested. Daddy understood. He and Mother had promised that to night I might stay up as late as I wished to talk to Astri. Now Astri wanted me to go to bed. I wanted to at least listen a little while, since I could not be heard. But I knew it was hopeless to wish for Astri’s attention. So I went to bed. In Review As I lay beneath the warm quilt, my heart felt broken into little pieces. I thought of the day’s events, my work, my plans, the album. Everything I planned had gone wrong. Astri, the idol of my life, was not the loving aunt I had (Please turn to page seven)