University of Oregon, Eugene
.. - .. mi m ‘.nw ' ti'lttiatim «■«»
Sterling Green, Editor Grant Thuemmel, Manager
Joseph Saslavsky, Managing Editor
EDITORIAL BOARD
Doug Polivka and Don Caswell, As.sooiate Editors; Merlin Blais,
Guy Shadduck, Parks Hitchcock, Stanley Rohe
The Oregon Daily Emerald, official student publication of the
University of Oregon, Eugene, published daily during the college
year, except Sundays, Mondays, holidays, examination periods,
all of December and all of March except the first three days.
Entered in the postoffice at Eugene, Oregon, as second-class
matter. Subscription rates, $2.50 a year.
LOOK THEM OVER
Again three dozen amendments submitted at
the student assembly Wednesday are pub
lished in the Emerald, in accordance with provi
sions of the constitution.
The Emerald withholds comment, favorable or
adverse, upon individual amendments in this issue,
since they are theoretically on display for unguided
and unbiased consideration of the student body.
We have already formed opinions on most of
them, however, and will be ready to present in the
next issue brief discussions of each amendment, to
gether with the Emerald’s recommendations for
voting.
Upon certain of the amendments we have
reached no conclusion, and have determined to
sound out the most expert opinion available. These
opinions will be presented also in Tuesday’s edition.
For the present we can only recommend that
every student scan all the amendments printed. It
is hardly to be expected that a great many stu
dents will attempt to study them all, yet in a bal
loting as light as we fear next Wednesday’s will be,
the well-considered opinion of a minority may go
far in selecting beneficial proposals and rejecting
the unwise ones.
OUT OF THE BASKETBALL RED
THE sixth set of congratulations in seven years
is due Washington for winning the northern
division basketball title, although the season is not
quite over.
But the race for second place is not quite so
definite. Oregon and Oregon State, each withj i
seven wins and seven losses, each with a win over j i
the other, will meet the weekend of March 2 and 3 11
to finish the season and decide who wins the annual 1
duel as well as second place. 1
This will add a pleasant spice to the series. So J
far neither school has the slightest claim to a j
superior schedule. Even the Frosh and Rooks have
contributed to (he “Even-Steven” atmosphere by
dividing their four games, each team winning twice i
on its own court. <
Whatever happens, Coach Reinhart and his j
squad deserve credit for forgetting a disastrous
1933 season, when they won but two games, and <
climbing far away from the cellar. They can’t, *
win the championship now, but they’ve redeemed; 1
Oregon in one season.
It appears that Oregon is definitely in the race
for the championship once more, after an extended ]
slump. With veteran sophomore players and prom- .
ising freshman prospects, we can look forward to :
1935 with real anticipation of a great schedule. ]
THE MATRIX TABLE TRADITION
IN the Matrix Table banquet, the University has i
one of its most constructive institutions.
This annual event brings together outstanding 1
women who are leaders in literature and arts, as
well as student representatives of sororities and
honoraries. .
Theta Sigma Phi, the women’s professional
journalism honorary, deserves a great deal of credit
in bringing the Matrix Table to its present prestige
and consistency of success. An invitation to the
banquet is a real recognition of merit and a highly
cherished honor.
The most commendable feature of the affair i3
the fact that, though it is presented by a profes
sional honorary, it does not confine its scope to
the limitations of that particular profession. Its
purpose transcends the ordinary boundaries of oc
cupational division and extend to every field of
cultural attainment.
Traditions such as the Matrix Table, which
bring all achievement to a figure of unity, deserve
to be patronized by every person interested in the
highest aims of college life, and should be at
tempted by more organizations in place of the hol
low routine that marks so many.
Articles of Amendment
Note:: Amendments to the A.
S. U. O. constitution proposed at
the student body assembly are
here published for the second
time, as provided by the consti
tution. Articles of amendment
submitted by the formal revision
committee are presented first,
followed by the independently
proposed amendments in order
as they will affect articles, sec
tions and clauses of the consti
tution. They will appear sub
stantially thus on the ballots at.
the election Wednesday, Febru
ary 28.
Amendment Article I
Nominations and Elections
Section I.
There shall be two regular meet
ings of the Associated Students
ea*h year. The first meeting shall
be held the third Thursday in
April, at which nominations shall
be made as herein provided. The
second meeting shall be held on
the call of the executive council
on or before the fifteenth of May.
At this meeting the newly elected
student body officers shall assume
their respective offices after ap
propriate installation.
Section 2.
Elections shall be held on the
seventh day following nominations.
Section 3.
Nominating conventions shall be
held by the outgoing freshman,
sophomore, and junior classes on
the third Thursday in April.
Section 4.
Class elections shall be held on
the same date and in the same
manner as elections of the Asso
ciated Students.
Section 5.
Such elections shall be conduct
ed jointly by the vice-president of
the Associated Students, president
of the junior class, president of
the sophomore class, and president
of the freshman class.
Amendment Article II
Class Identity for Voting Purposes
Section I. I
The class identity of members
of the Associated Students for the
purpose of voting in class elections
shall be determined on the basis
of the rules of classification of the
University. Class voting lists com
piled according to this classifica
tion shall be posted in a public
place or published iu the Daily Em
erald at least fifteen days prior to
the regular or special class elec
tion.
Section 2.
Any student wishing to change
his class identity for the purpose
of voting in class elections may
submit his request by petition to
the Student Relations committee,
provided, however, that such pe
tition be submitted at least 72
hours prior to the general or spe
cial class election.
Section 3.
Such petitions shall be granted
or rejected by the Student Rela
tions committee on the basis of
regulations set down by resolution
of' the executive council.
Amendment Article III
Judiciary Cojnmittee
Section 1.
The judiciary, to which any |
member or administrative body of |
the Associated Students may refer
any question on which it desires
un opinion as to the correct judi
cial construction or interpretation
of any .art of this constitution
and by-laws, shall consist of five
members: dean of the law school
as permanent chairman; and four
members appointed by the retiring
president and president-elect of the
Associated Students and1 the pres
ident of the University, not later
than May fifteenth of each year.
Two of these shall be members of
the faculty or administrative staff
of the University, and two shall
be upperclassmen or graduate stu
dents.
Section 2.
The appointive members of this
committee shall serve for a term
[ of one year and shall be appointed
on or before May fifteenth of each
year. Vacancies shall be filled on
appointment by the president of
the Associated Students and pres
ident of the University.
Section 3.
The judiciary shall have su
preme and final authority on all
questions of interpretation of this
constitution, by-laws, and student
legislation, and on all disputes
arising from student body or class
i elections.
Amendment Article XV
Quorum
Fifteen percent of the members
of the Associated Students shall
constitute a quorum at any regu
lar or special meeting of the As
sociated Students.
Amendment Article V
Executive Man
Section 1.
Candidates for the office of ex
ecutive man must have completed
at least four terms at the Univer
sity of Oregon.
Section 2.
The executive man shall hold of
fice for one year, or until such
time as his successor is elected and
qualified.
Section 3.
If a sophomore at the time of
his election, he shall be eligible for
election to offices of the Associat
ed Students the succeeding year
unless otherwise stipulated in this
constitution.
Amendment Article VI
Amendments to Constitution and!
By-Laws
Amendments to this constitution!
and by-laws may be proposed at
any regular or special meeting of
the Associated Students provided
said amendment is submitted on
petition signed by at least .100
members.
It is hereby proposed to amend
Article I, Section 2, to read:
Section 2. MEMBERSHIP. A '
committee shall be appointed to
exempt from payment of associ
ated student dues all students who
can show financial need or an in
ability to avail themselves of the
privileges of the organization.
This committee also shall exempt ]
students who are blind, crippled [
or otherwise unable to participate ]
in the functions of the organiza-! j
tion. Tins committee shall con-1.
sist of three professors, appointed t
by the president of the University, t
and two upperclass students, one }
to be appointed by the president t
of the University, the other by j j
the president of the Associated i
Students. All undergraduate stu- t
dents not exempt by this commit- f
Lee shat) be members and pay the a
membership dues.
It io hereby proposed to amend i a
the A.S.U.O. constitution and by
laws as follows:
Article II, Section 3, shall read:
Section 3. QUORUM. Four hun
dred members shall constitute a
quorum. .
Section 1 Article III of the A. S.
U. O. constitution shall be amend
ed to include the following clause,
which shall be known as clause 4:
CLAUSE 4. The presidency of
the Associated Students shall al
ternate yearly between men and
women. In even years, commenc
ing 1934, only women students
shall be eligible for that office. In
odd years, commencing 1935, only
men shall be eligible.
In order that every student shall
have an opportunity to be a candi
date for the presidency while in
school, Clause 1, Section 2, Arti
cle III shall be changed as fol
lows :
Clause 1. Candidates for the of
fice of president must bo students
who at the beginning of the fol
lowing fall term shall have the
university rank of junior or senior, j
their scholastic record and pro
gram being such as to automatic
ally given them junior or senior
status on the completion of their
spring term courses.
Candidates for the offices of
vice-president, secretary, executive
man and executive woman must
have completed at least seven
terms, and must be of junior
standing at the time of the nomin
ation.
To change ARTICLE III, Sec-1
tlon 2, Clause 1, to the following:
Article III
Section 2. NOMINATIONS
AND ELECTIONS
Clause 1, Nominations shall be
from the floor at a general A. S.
U. O. meeting the third Thursday
in April. Elections shall be held'
on the seventh day following nom
inations. 1
A suggested change in the As
sociated Students Constitution as
shown below:
The recall section, which is sec-1,
lion 7 of Article III .shall be ,
•hanged to read as follows: Sec- ,
tion 7, RECALL. A special stu- .
lent body election for the recall <
>f any officer of the association !
shall be called by the president of
he student body at the petition of
on (10) per cent of the members ,
>f the associated students. At this | j
•lection it will require a majority t
if the votes case to recall from
iffice the officer in question.
In order that independent stu-j'
ients shall be represented on the ,!
executive council, the following 1
iection shall be added to Article !l
V of the ASUO constitution.
Section 2, A. There shall also 1
>e on the executive council two !
Indents, neither of whom are af- *
Hinted or pledged to any social1 s
raternity or sorority, one of whom 0
hall be a man and the other a wo- 1
nan. These two members shall be 11
looted at the general election by *’
majority of the ballots cast only
'.v students not affiliated, or
lodged to, any social fraternity ’■ -J
r sorority In the event that ei- 1
her of these officers pledges a
raternity or sorority prior to, or 11
iter his election, he shall be im- 1
tediately disqualified to continue, ti
aid the vacancy shall be filled by T
n election held v it bin thre^ weeks ! s
hereafter, at which only non-af
iliated students shall vote. The
nan independent student shall be
i voting member of the finance
md athletic committees and the
roman independent shall be a vot
ng member of the student rela
ions and publications committees.
To alter Article IV of the A. S.
J. O. Constitution by changing
Clause 11 so that it will appear
is follows:
Clause 11. The Executive Coun
il shall have control of all funds
if the association, with power to
(ledge and/or hypothecate the
;ame and the fees herein desig
lated to create said funds as se
:urity for any advances or loans
nade to the Associated Students
md use said funds and/or said
ees in payment thereof, but all
oans so secured and all fees so
lypothecated must be approved at
l general or special election of the
nembers of the association, by a
najority vote, before such loan is
nade or fees hypothecated.
To alter Article IV of the A. S.
J. O. Constitution so as to appear
is shown below:
Add the following clause to
Article IV of the constitution:
Section 4. MEETINGS.
Clause 4. All regular and spe
lial meetings of the Executive
Council shall be open meetings,
md any member of the Associated
Students shall be permitted to at
tend the same.
Article IV, Section 4, shall be
amended by adding a clause to
read as follows:
The proceedings of the regular
md special meetings of the execu
tive council shall be published in
full in the next ensuing issue of
the Emerald after the meeting.
It is hereby proposed to add
Section 8 to Article IV as follows:
Section 8. INITIATIVE
AND REFERENDUM.
Clause 1. The general proced
ure of the referendum shall be
similar to that specified in the
state constitution of Oregon. Ref
erendum petitions on all actions of
the executive council may be filed
within three weeks by ten (10)
per cent of the students voting at
the last general election. An elec
tion must be held within one week
after the petition has been filed
with the secretary of the associ
ated students. A majority of the
ballots cast at the special election
will decide the issue. During the
time that the referendum is in
process, the actions of the execu
tive council in question must be
held in abeyance. A referendum
shall be considered started when
seventy-five (75) students file for
mal notice with the secretary of
the associated students that they
intend to invoke it against an
maetment of the executive coun
3il.
Clause 2. The initiative general
procedure shall also be similar to
hat specified in the state consti
ution of Oregon. Ten (10) per
ent of the students voting at the
ast general election may propose
oy petition any measure that is
within the power of the executive
:ouncil. Within two (2) weeks
after such a petition has been
filed with the secretary of the as
sociated students, the measures
jhall be voted upon. A majority
jf the ballots cast shall be neces
sary to pass the measure.
Article V of the Associated Stu
lents Constitution shall be al
tered, and shall now be:
ARTICLE V
The Judiciary
Section 1. The dean of the law
school, one member of the faculty
Leaching- staff appointed by the
president of the University, and
me upperclass student selected by
he two foregoing members of the
ommittee, shall constitute a judi
Mary, to which any member or
idministrative body of the Asso
;iated Students may refer any
luestion on which it desires an
>pinion as to the correct judicial
■onstruction or interpretation of
my part of this Constitution and
3y-Laws.
Section 2. The decision of the
ludiciary committee shall be made
i matter of public record; con
lusive on the particular point in
’olved; binding upon the officers,
lasses, organization; committees,
ind members of the Associated
Students; enforceable by appro
uiate administration.
If is hereby proposed to add to
Section 1 of Article VI the fol
awing:
4. The associated students
hall publish each year a stu
ent handbook, a copy to be
iven to each member student at
he start of the autumn term, i
'his shall include a list of honor
nd social organizations, the serv
'e clubs, a complete list of aca
emic requirements, a complete
st of school traditions and rally
ongs, a copy of the associated
tudents' constitution, and a list
f the personnel of the University
; also shall include a list of the
lembership of the state board of
igher education.
It is hereby proposed to amend
t ticle VI, Section 2. Clause 1. to ;
sad:
Clause I. Associated student
lembership dues shall be reduced
om five dollars iSd) per term
> three dollars per term,
lus money shall be paid into the
nieial fund. Accordingly, this:
shall change associated student
dues from $15 per year to $9 per
year, payable in three install
ments, one at the start of each
term. If any sum in excess of
three dollars per student is col
lected by the University adminis
tration for associated student
membership each term, such ex
cess shall be returned to the indi
vidual students ti-rough the. office
of the graduate manager.
Article VI, Section 2, shall be
amended by adding clause 3 to
read as follows:
Claus£ 3: Graduate students
shall not be required to pay mem
bership fees in the A. S. U. O.. but
they may be granted the rights of
members, with the exception of
voting powers, upon payment of
one-half of the fee charged to un
dergraduate students. For the
purpose of this provision, a grad
uate student shall include those
students who, although not having
degrees, are entitled to pay the
graduate fee for registration in
the University.
It is hereby proposed to amend
Article VI, Section 3, Clause 3, to
read:
Clause 3. Students may loan
their associated student member
ship cards to whomever they wish
for use at events and contests,
for which the admission price is
forty (40) cents or under.
It is hereby proposed to add
Section 6 to Article VI, to read:
Section G. AUDIT, The books
of the associated students shall
be audited annually by a regular
auditor of the state of Oregon,
Copies of this audit shall be pub
lished in two (2) issues of the
Oregon Daily Emgrald.
It is hereby proposed to add
Section 6 to Article VI.
Section 6. FREE INTELLEC
TUAL ACTIVITIES COMMIT
TEE. The associated students
shall appropriate one hundred and
fifty (150) dollars each term for
the Free Intellectual Activities
committee to use in bringing
speakers to the campus. This
fund shall be devoted expressly
towards presenting both sides of
fundamental issues, particularly
when one side has apparently been
presented with the idea of propa
ganda in mind.
To change ARTICLE VII, Sec
tion 3, Clause 1, to the following:
Article VII. Class constitution.
Section 3. Nominations.
Clause 1. A nominating con
vention shall be held, by the out
going freshman, sophomore and
junior classes, on the fourth
Thursday after Associated Stu
dents elections have been held, at
which time a President, a Vice
president, a vice-president, a sec
retary, and a treasurer shall be
j nominated.
AMENDMENTS TO
BY-LAWS
These amendments are proposed
to change the by-laws of the As
sociated Students of the Univer
sity of Oregon, to become effect
ive upon passage thereof.
Article III, Section 2 shall be
changed, viz:
Section 2. FINANCE COMMIT
TEE.
Clause 1. Membership. The fi
nance committee shall consist of
Students who shall act as chair
man; the junior and senior finance
officers, the unaffiliated man stu
dent on the executive council, the
dean of the school oP business ad
ministration, or his representative;
the comptroller of the University,
or his representative; and the sen
ior woman on the executive coun
cil.
Article ill, Section 2, Clause 1
shall be changed, to appear as fol
lows :
Section 2. ATHLETIC COM
MITTEE.
Clause 1. Membership. This
committee shall consist of six
members, as follows: The presi
dent of the Associated Students
who shall act as chairman, one
faculty member of the executive
council chosen by the president of
the Associated Students; one two- j
year athletic letterman, who shall I
be appointed by the president of j
the University; one alumnus not
affiliated with the executive coun-1
cil to be appointed by the president j
of the University; the independent
man student on the executive coun
cil: and the dean of the school of
physical education or his represen- i
tative.
Article III, Section 3. Clause 1
shall be changed, to appear as fol
lows ;
Section 3. PUBLICATIONS
COMMITTEE.
Clause 1. This committee shall
consist of seven members as fol-!
lows: The editor of the Oregon
Daily Emerald, who shall be chair
man: president of the associated j'
students: lean of the school of
journalism, or his representative; '
the unaffiliated woman on the ex
ecutive council; the editor of the
Oregana: one faculty member not
on the executive council to be ap
pointed by the president of the,1
University; and one member of the
editorial staff of the Oregon Daily
Emerald to be chosen by the editor
of that paper.
ARTICLE 111. SECTION 3,
CLAUSE I
Athletic Committee
.ilunbtr. lnp Iliia committee1
shall consist of eight members;
four of whom shall be students,
two of whom shall be members of
the faculty, and one of whom shall
be a representative of the alumni.
At least three of these shall also
oe members of the Executive
Council. In addition the Graduate
Manager shall be a non-voting
member and shall act as secre
tary. This committee shall be ap
pointed by the President and Pres
ident-elect of the Associated Stu
dents net later than May 15th of
each year.
Article III, Section 7, Clause 1 !
shall be changed, to appear as fol
lows :
Section 7. STUDENT RELA
TIONS COMMITTEE.
Clause 1. Membership. This
committee shall consist of seven
members; the vice-president of the
Associated Students; the unaffili
ated woman on the executive
council; the president of the As
sociated Students; dean of per
sonnel administration, or his rep
resentative; executive man; presi
dent of the Interfraternity Coun
cil; and the president of the Pan
Hellenic Council. The secretary
of the Associated Students shall
act as a non-voting member and
secretary to this committee.
Amendment to By-Laws
Article III, Section 7, Clause 1
Srudent Relations Committee
Membership. This committee
shall consist of seven members;
The president of the Associated
Students, who shall act as chair
man, two student members of the
executive council, two members of
the faculty or administrative staff
of the University, and the grad
uate manager, who shall be a non
voting member and shall act as
secretary. This committee shall be
appointed by the president and
president-elect of the Associated
Students not later than May 15th
of each year.
Amend Article IV of the by-laws
of A. S. U. O. constitution by in- ]
eluding Clause 9 to Section 2, viz:
Article IV, Section 2, Clause 9:
No employee of the Associated
Students, except the head football
coach, shall receive fi*jm the Asso
ciated Students an annual com
pensation of more than $3,S00.
It is hereby proposed to change
the By-Laws of the A. S. U. O.
constitution as follows;
Change Section 4 of Article VI
of the By-Laws to read;
Article VI: Publications.
Section 4. FINANCIAL. The
editors and managers of the As
sociated Students Publications
shall receive the following annual
compensation, payable in monthly
installments:
Editor, Oregon Daily Emerald,
$450.00 per year.
Managing Editor, Oregon Daily
Emerald, $200.00 per year.
Associate Editor, News Editor,
and Sports Editor shall each re
ceive $75 per year.
Business Manager, Oregon Daily
Emerald, $400.00 per year.
Advertising Manager, Oregon
Daily Emerald, $175.00 per year.
Editor of the Oregana, $200.00
per year.
Business Manager of the Ore
gana, $100.00 per year.
It is hereby proposed to change
the By-Laws of the A. S. U. O.
constitution by adding the follow
ing Section to Article VI of the
By-Laws;
Article VI. Publications.
Section 6. In order to safe
guard the freedom of the press
and insure to the Editor of the
Oregon Daily Emerald the oppor
tunity to express his views with
out fear or favor, the said editor
shall not be removed from nis edi
CLASSIFIED
Advertisements
Rates Payable in Advance
10c a line for first insertion;
5c a line for each additional !
insertion. j
Telephone 3300; local 214 j
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Petite Shop, 573 13th Ave. E.
Phone 3208.
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POR a general tailoring on men's
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Pressing prices reasonable. 1128
Alder. Phone 2641.
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Broadway.
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1825 Fairmount Blvd.
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Telephones 742 or S90-J
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torial position except upon a mo- ]
tion passed by the publications \
committee and ratified by a two- |
thirds vote of the members of the
Associated Students.
The Editor of the Oregon Daily \
Emerald shall have the sole power
to remove subordinates on his
staff.
It is hereby proposed to add
Section 6 to Article VI of the By
Laws, as follows:
Section 6. SUBSCRIPTIONS.
Complimentary subscriptions of
the Oregon Daily Emerald shall
be given yearly to the editor of
every daily newspaper in the
state, to each member of the state
board of higher education, and to
each member of the board of con
trol of the state government.
Every graduating member of the
Emerald staff, for the first two
years following graduation, also
shall receive subscriptions upon
recommendation of the editor and
business manager of the publica
tion.
It is hereby proposed to add
Article VIII to the By-Laws, as
follows:
ARTICLE VIII
(Director of Intercollegiate
Athletics)
Section 1. SELECTION. The
director of intercollegiate athletics
shall be selected by the faculty
(Continued on Page Three)
Innocent
Bystander
By BARNEY CLARK
nnHE warm weather we have ex
perienced lately has certainly
fooled the boys and girls. They
think it’s spring, and have pro
ceeded to plant pins with the
greatest eclat and glee. Lord
knows what they’ll harvest when
they find out it isn't spring and
their youthful ardor cools down.
Anyhow, this youthful enthus
iasm has given I.B. the inspiration
for a Super-Special Triple Com
pound Slide Valve Guess Contest.
On one side of the column imme
diately south of this introduction
there will be appended a list of
names belonging to gentlemen
who have lost their pins. On the
opposite side will be the names of
the gals they lost ’em to. We shuf
fled them four times and cut the
deck. It’s up to you six readers to
pick out the correct pairs. The
person winning the contest will be
awarded any one of I.B.’s five fian
cees, as he is getting pietty dis
couraged about them.
* * *
Dick Shearer. ..
Jim Emmett
Platt Davis
Dick Carter ,
A1 Nielsen
Malcolm Bauer
John Gribble
Jerry Denslow
George Chambe
Harlow Davis
Leighton Gee
Neal Bush
Mark Temple
. Roberta Moody
Virginia Gaddis
Kay Larson
Claudia Bartrum
Betty Graham
Margaret Keene
Shirley Hendricks
Charlotte Eldridge
rlain
Laura Goldsmith
Peggy Carper
Dorothy McCall
Ruth Byerly
Frances Spence
One of our education professors
was pretty desperate the other
day. He couldn't seem to get his
class to pay attention. They were
all the time looking out of the
window. At the end of a futile
half-hour’s struggle, he discovered
that the class was watching a
young couple in the GRAVEYARD
Emerald
of the Air
'P'RED McKINNEY will be at the
piano for some of his artistic
popular melody playing. He is a
member of the Delt trio and will
play several of the numbers that
the trio is taking with them to
night to sing at the Junior Prom
in Corvallis, the boys having been
persuaded to journey west for the
said occasion. The broadcast is as
usual at 4:30.
On Monday afternoon we inaug
urate a new kind of news broad
cast by offering 15 minutes of ex
changes from the various college
papers of the country. Bits of in
teresting news, oddities, and hu
mor (you might call it that) will
be presented in this program.
The programs originate in the
studios of KORE.
engaged in what medieval writers
used to call “light dalliance.” He
gave up the struggle then, for
naturally, dry academic facts can
not compete with the stronger
passions.
* * *
Phi Delta Theta has an inner or
ganization all its own. This select
group is known as the C.M.T.C.,
has a charter and constitution,
and a closely restricted member
ship. The initials stand for Cal
ories Make Tummies Conspicuous.
Its purpose is to reduce the waist
lines of its members. Brother
Remi Force is the Supreme Pleni
potentiary. Brother Ed Cross was
to be added to the ranks the other
day, but as one of the initiation
requirements is to sit through an
entire meal without eating, Cross
decided he couldn't face the ordeal,
things being as they are, and
Cross being what he is. Besides,
Cross had planted the pledge pin,
and as there is only one pledge pin,
they couldn’t proceed with the
ceremony.
Word reaches us that selections
for the Gamma Alpha Chi model
contest are being held up by Ed
Schweiker. Ed declares that the
bribes he has received so far have
n’t been high enough. Also he has
n’t been able to make a thorough
investigation of the candidates. He
asserts that he will make the final
choice today, if the six most beau
tiful girls on the campus will ap
pear in bathing suits on the Phi
Delt porch at 12:30, or just after
he has eaten lunch. It is hinted
that he intends to charge admis
sion to see these beauties, and thus
make up the deficit between his
asking price on the bribes and
what he actually got.
Irvin Hill is still in a highly ner
vous condition from the shock he
received the other night. It seems
that Irvin was stumblipg up the
back steps of the Ad building dur
ing a rehearsal of “The Cradle
Song.” Just as he reached the top
he looked up and saw three NUNS,
each supporting a cigarette and
smoking like a chimney. It was
shortly after this that he refused
a drink of beer.
* * *
OGDEN GNASHES
“Though Fate may have tromped
On your young career,
You can drown your troubles
In five per cent beer!”
“Pour it back in the gas tank;
I can't drink it!
IRISH’S
THE HOME OWNED CASH FOOD
STORES THAT SAVE YOU
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49c 95c
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49 bl. Bag $1-25
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2 Kellogg’s Whole
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1 Rice Krispy
1 Corn Flakes
29c
Corn
Golden Bantam
Tlivec cans
Case
25c
$1.95
Sugar Pure Cane
10 lbs. 47 c
100 lbs. *4 65
t'O bo
Crackers
lbs. Graham
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