EDITORIALS
FEATURES
HUMOR
LITERARY ♦
University of Oregon, Eugene
Vinton Hall, Editor Anton Peterson, Manager
Willis Duniway, Managing Editor
Hex Tussiny Associate Editor
Dave Wilson, Lois Nelson, Horry Van Dine—Editorial Writers
UPPER NEWS STAFF
Editor’s Secretary: Mary Helen Corbett
Assistant: Lillian Rankin
Barney Miller, Features
Carol Hurlburt, society
Lester McDonald, Literary
Warner Guiss, Chief Night Editor
inn uogsweu. oiiui w)
NEWS STAFF
Reporters: Lois Nelson, Merlin Blais, Betty Anne Macduff, Roy Sheedy, Ted Mont- ;
yomery, Jessie Steele, Isabelle Crowell, .Inek BellinKer, Betty Davis, Helen Cherry,
Virginia Wentz. .Jim Brooke, Joan Cox, Kenneth Kitajterald, Madeline Gilbert.
Georite Root. Frances Taylor. Duane Frisian, Caroline Card, Wilietta Hartley, Ituth
Dupuis, Beverly Caverhill, Frances Johnston, Ned Mars, Oscar Munster.
Niyht Staff: Tuesday—Eugene D. Mullins, Dave Longshore, Mary Frances I’ettibone.
Day FJditors: Thornton Gale, Lenore Ely, Thornton Shaw.
Sports Staff: Vincent Gates. Ed Gnodnouirh, Bruce Hamby, FJrvin Laurence, Esther
Hayden.
Radio Staff: Art F’otwin, director; Carol Hurlburt, secretary; Dave Eyre, reporter.
BUSINESS STAFF
Harry ionkon, Associate mamiKu-r
Jack Gregg, Advertising Manager
Larry Jackson, Foreign Advertising
Ken Siegrist, Circulation Manager
Ned Mars, Copy Manager
Martin Allen, Ass’t Copy Manager
Mae Mulchay, Ass’t Foreign Adv. Mgr.
Edith Peterson, Financial Adm.
John Painton, Office Manager 1
Hetty Carpenter, Women’s Specialties
Harriet Hoffman, Sez Sue
Kathryn Laughridge, Asst. Sez Sue
Carol Werachkul, Executive Secretary
Larry Bay, Ass’t Circulation Manager
Bob Goodrich, Service Manager
Marie Nelson, Checking Department
)orothy Hughes, Classified Advertising Manager
Hot Chestnuts
OUR colleagues, the Portland Oregonian and the Portland
News, are busy these days, batting back and forth acrid
comments on the rpcent suggestion of the Oregonian that Port
land’s municipal power survey be entrusted to the research de
partment of the University of Oregon.
The city of Portland has appropriated $25,000 for the purpose
of inquiry "into the expediency and feasibdity of municipal de
velopment of hydro-electric power.” Several commissioners pro
pose that the entire sum be paid to the firm of Carey and
Harlan, Tacoma experts on public utilities, who have been em
ployed by the city several times in the past for similar surveys.
The Oregonian, consistently antagonistic to this firm, makes the
counter-proposal that the University’s "research department” be
given the job.
This, of course, is a matter that would affect directly only
the faculty and the administration. Discussion of it in a student
daily can have no authoritative interpretation as an expression
of the University’s attitude . that is a question for the admin
istration. But we are at least permitted to express our opinion,
and it is with the best interest of the University at heart that
we rise to remark, "Hot stoves frequently burn innocent
fingers.”
The question of municipal development of power has become
a political issue of primary Importance; no institution could
enter the arena as impartial arbiter without soon provoking the
wrath and unconcealed boos of some section of interested spec
tators.
Carey and Harlan was a generally respected firm in Port
land. It started accepting large sums of public money for “sur
veys” of public utilities. Today the staunchness of their friends,
editorial and political, is due largely to the bitterness of their
enemies. Somewhat such fate would probably befall investiga
tors from the Oregon faculty and would have a regrettable effect
upon public opinion.
There is little similarity between such problems as Oregon's
Pacific trade and fluctuations in the lumber market, which have
formed the bulk of the business administration school’s research,
and the opinionated question of municipal development of power.
Bulletins of research on these non-eontroversial questions are re
ceived with appreciative interest by the people of the state.
Would the same be true of a bulletin on Portland’s power status?
The questioned impartiality of our faculty, which the Ore
gonian cites as the strongest argument for turning the power
survey over to the University, is too valuable to be risked on
a field where none are neutral and non-combatants are un
known.
A Place For Student Voice
\\THEN the faculty of the University of Oregon voted unani
* * mously to include three students in the student advisory
committee, a group of officials charged with the administration
of punishment to erring members of the associated students not
subject to control by the executive council itself, it took a long
and far-reaching stride toward common understanding between
the factions faculty and students.
Mutual responsibility in the development of students anil the
administration of discipline have been coincident aims of all
those maintaining interest in operation of the inner cogs of the
University machine. The student has a responsibility in the
support of recognized standards of his Institutions he will as
sume this and his judgment will not waver nor shall it be in
fluenced by the airy thoughts of favor or of prejudice. His
decisions will not be marred by extreme rigidity over a true
conception of justice.
Personnel of the student representation in this group is im
portant. There is little reason why he should not be a fifth
year man. In fact, a student who has been "through the mill"
- a student who has been in constant contact with University
activities and administration procedure or one who can well
sense the generalized feeling among his fellow students would
be a most beneficial and a truly representative addition.
A student with qualifications as such must not lose the re
sponsibility delivered to him through the student government,
nor should each representative be a key on the executive instru
ment of the student body, .lust what influence the students
have in the advisory committee tests in the men or women
chosen.
The student advisory committee, composed wholly of faculty
members, has handed some very reasonable decisions and sug
gestions from its chamber. Some have been less satisfactory.
No material change will result from the addition of student mem
bership, but campus steam will be shackled by a sturdier safet>
valve.
Discipline ol students has been officially placed in the hands
of the faculty by the president if the University, and it is to
them wo extend our thanks for showing student voice in their
discussions and decisions.
"The art of the lover consists not m loving hut in showing
his love to the best advantage." Bo rehem. \*’hv doc am al
ways wish to be an aria1
WThe ♦ ♦
ETFOOT
“All the
News
That’s Foot
To Print”
“WHAT DO YOU THINK OF
THE RUSSIAN FIVE - YEAH
ECONOMIC PLAN?” AND OTH
ER FORMS OF PROFESSORIAL
SALUTATION. IN ANSWER TO
this c::ry we reply that
WE THINK IT’S THE ROCKS.
ONE Wr.EK OF RUSHIN’ IS
ENOUGL TO PROSTRATE THE
AVERAGE STUDENT. FIVE
YEARS OF IT AND WE’D .BE
SO GA-GA THAT WE’D PROB
ABLY CONSENT TO WRITE A
HUMOR COLUMN AGAIN, OR
ELSE WE’D BE OUT TRYING
TO SHARPEN OUR TEETH ON
THE SENIOR BENCH. WELL,
ANYWAY, YOU GET THE IDEA.
# * *
EPITAPH
We opened the door,
He sat on the floor
Midst a pile of crumbs and alone;
His mouth fulla cake,
He sez: “Greetings, Jake,
Ya gotta package from home.”
# * *
MILTON MIGHT HAVE DONE
BETTER THAN THAT, BUT WE
WILL BET THAT HE WOULD
NOT HAVE FELT ANY MORE
DEEPLY ABOUT IT.
# * *
And then Tony Peterson just'
walked in with the saddest story
of the year. It seems that Tony
had very skillfully manipulated to
get the distribution of free sample
Chesterfields for the entire cam
pus, and then, after indulging in
roseate dreams of not having to
buy any more cigarettes for the
entire year, woke up one morning
to find that someone had soul
lessly lifted his entire stock. Mr.
Peterson darkly intimates that he
hopes the culprit gets the habit.
* * *
WELL, TONY, AS THE BULL
SAID, AFTER WATCHING A
RIVAL WALK OFF WITH THE
FAVORITE MEMBER OF HIS
HAREM, “THERE IS NO HONOR
AMONG BEEVES.”
AND THEN WHAT’S THIS
WE HEAR ABOUT A CERTAIN
BUSTLING, BRAWNY, BLUE
EYED MEMBER OF THE JOUR
NALISM FACULTY, WHO IS
ALSO INTERESTED IN THE
THEATER BUSINESS, TURN
ING IN A WELL MEANT, BUT
NEVERTHELESS FALSE FIRE
ALARM, AND SENDING THE
LOCAL DEPARTMENT UP TO
THE THETA AND K A P P A
HOUSES THE OTHER NIGHT?
Little Alec suggests that this
person was evidently going on the
false assumption that where there
was smoke, there was also fire.
* * *
Rebecca just c&nic bustling in
with the startling news that she
got the pure quill that the Sigma
Nus were going to win the schol
arship plaque this year.
* * *
Yes, Rebecca, and some day
grass is going to grow on the Sig
ma Chi lawn, too.
* * *
WHY WERE AS WE ARE
Radio programs, classes galore,
Futility of life anil ruts;
j An aching tooth, lemon cukes—
Classified
Advertisements
Kales Payable in Advance
20c first three lines; 5c every
additional line. Minimum charge
20c. Contracts made by arrange
ment.
Telephone 3300; local 214
Lost
BROWN PURSE at Woman's
building during week-end of
High School conference. Re
ward. Call 2743-W.
PAIR GLASSES in brown case.
Call 2900.
Found
j GREEN PARKER fountain pen.
i Call at Emerald business office.
Physicians
DALE AND SETHER
Surgery, Radium, X-ray
l Miner Bldg. Phone 43
School*
Learn the Latest Collegiate
Fox-Trots and Waltzes!
MERRICK DANCE STUDIO
SO 1 Willamette Phone 3081
ELVINA MAGILL Call for Colo
nial theatre pass at the Emerald
business office.
For Kent
FURNISHED and unfurnished
houses and apartments in Uni
versity district. Robert Pres
iuit Co. Phom. 31o
Ve Gods! We’re goin’ nuts.
Soup for lunch and spinach too,
A wailing sux—is there no peace?
Clacking tongues that gleefully
tell
Scandalous filth—may its tribe in
crease.
House unheated, up at seven,
To wade through rain all day;
II est vrai que vous etes helle—
Oh, keeper, take us away!
* * *
Dear sir:
In regard to your daughter, who
says that there is no meter in the
above doggerel, you tell her that
if she will be at Condon libe at
10 o’clock tomorrow night, we’ll
meter half way.
Yours,
WETFOOT.
* * *
OUR NEW POLICY
As we sit here watching two
little beetles trying to work a
cross word puzzle, a sudden in
spiration seizes us. A dawning
resolve, which slowly but surely
culminates into a worthy deter
mination. We are going to revolu
tionize our entire column. We will
make a humor column that is dif
ferent, one that is original, one
that will stand in the annals of
collegiate publication alone and
unique.
In our new column we shall not
resort to odorous puns to fill up
space. We shall taboo all light
doggerel which is without nieter,
purpose, or sense. W'e are firmly
resolved, as our enthusiasm for
this new iconoclasm increases, to
not print any scandal or jealously
guarded anecdotes which might
draw upon us the wrath of all con
cerned.
Furthermore we shall desist
writing epitaphs and shall merci
lessly cast out anything pertain
ing to barleycorn or sex. We shall
not piint unconstructive criticism
of any sort and shall not resort
to lampooning the faculty, campus
traditions or the campus cop.
From this time on we shall let our
material be censored by the W. C.
T. TT., the faculty, all the students
who are to be mentioned in its
confines, and the Eugene minis
terial association, not to mention
the instructors in the school of
English. All libelous and inane
matter shall be rejected.
How would we accomplish this?
you ask wonderingly. It would be
very simple, dear readers. We
would cense writing the column
entirely.
The Safety Valve
An Outlet for Campus Steam
All communications are to bo ad
dressed to Tlie Editor, Oregon Daily
Emerald. They shall not exceed 200
words. Each letter must be signed:
however, should the author desire, only
initials will he published. The editor
maintains the right to withhold pub
lication should he see fit.
Can Something Be Wrong?
To the Editor:
One of our ancient and anti
quated myths is that of our won
derful ‘’Oregon Spirit.” It lived
the life of a typical campus tradi
tion. In its youth our Oregon was
loved .served and revered by
alumni, faculty and" students
alike. But gradually babbitism
seized our alumni like a siren
lures a whole boatload of mariners
on the rocks of misfortune. Our
students have gone activity mad.
Our faculty hopelessly perform the
ritual, long ago stripped of its
meaning by a vain student body
i
nun
(a reptile-like monster which wal
lows around in the oozy mud of
self-deceit). Today “Oregon spir
it” is a matter of history like all
other traditions. It died, so they
say, because prosperity, progress,
business efficiency, publicity and
large scale production scented the
trail of the myth and chased the
antique to its lair and put an end
to its failing health.
Today in its place is a phlegmat
ic foundling by the same name,
our wonderful “Oregon Spirits.”
It's everywhere, in flask-shaped
bottles, over booing student root
ing sections, in pie-faced athletes’
minds, in the nonchalant stude
who wondered where those flashy
guards of Oregon came from, and
so on all over the campus, even
among the cocoons and spider
webs beneath the brim of our pio
, neer. Let's have real prohibition!
—Bremer.
A Response
To the Editor:
A certain group wishes to apol
ogize sincerely to a despondent
student for certain actions which
were demonstrated recently. We
realize to our chagrin how odious
it was, and we wish to assure you
that there will be.no repetition of
it in the future.
—A Certain Group.
SO THEY
▼ SAY ▼
Catchy Quotes From The
Prominent Profs.
"I .imagine that nine-tenths of
the college professors would starve
to death if they had to make their
living any other way.”
— Dean Phillip A. Parsons, social
science.
‘‘Inasmuch as the mortality
rate among our leading economists
has been so great lately, there is
still some chance for the members
of this class.”
—Donald Erb, economics.
"We cannot and will not tolerate
any man chewing tobacco in this
military department.”
Lieut. McCammon. military
science.
"The elders look upon youth to
day as they do, because the mem
bers of the younger generation are
able to adapt themselves to change
better than the old. The old folks
are unable to understand it.”
MRS. WARNER TELLS OF
TRIPS TAKEN ABROAD
(Continued from Cage One)
rose, thus showing her knowledge
; of their customs.
i After her talk Mrs, Warner
[ conducted the group through the
I art collection which is to be placed
j in the new art museum. She ex
) plained the different objects in the
j collection, giving the history of
j many pieces. Due to a misunder
standing, the announcement was
made that this tour would be con
j ducted in the new museum build
! ing, but the tour included the col
j lection now in Gerlinger hall. This
! was the first time in two years
that Mrs. Warner has personally
1 conducted a group through the
museum, and the other groups
were taken through several years
' ago.
Later the club was entertained
by several piano selections by Nor
! ma Lyons, while the social com
' mittee, under the direction of
Elizabeth Plummer, served tea.
1
Special Prices
To All
Fraternities and Sororities
On All Purchases
of
Floor Wax
and
Rentals on
Electric Polishers
1
Powers Furniture Co,
lltli and Willamette Sts.
CAMPUS ♦
ALENDAR
OREGANA PICTURES
(All pictures are taken at the
east entrance of Condon hall.)
Today
12:40—Temenids.
12:40—Pan Xenia.
12:45—Beta Gamma Sigma.
Thursday
12:40—Camma Alpha Chi.
| 12:45—German club.
Congress club meeting postponed
until next Wednesday because of
concert.
Alpha Kappa Psi will hold regu
lar January meeting Thursday at
the College Side.
Philomelete presidents will hold
a luncheon meeting Thursday noon
at the Green Lantern.
Studio plays will be given at
Guild theatre at 4:15 tomorrow af
ternoon. No admission.
Rehearsal of “Twelfth Night”
this afternoon at 3 o’clock. Act I,
scene 4; Act II, scene 4; Act I,
scene 1.
Theta Sigma Phi will hold a
short but important meeting to
night at 5 o’clock in room 105
Journalism.
All members of the cadet corps
and Scabbard and Blade must
have pictures taken in front of R.
O. T. C. barracks tomorrow at
12:30 for the Oregana.
Woman in Her Sphere group of
Philomelete will meet this Sunday
in the men’s lounge of Gerlinger
hall from 5 until 6 o'clock.
Alpha Gamma Phi, women's ad
vertising honorary, will meet at
the Green Tavern for a guest
luncheon today at 12 o’clock.
Westminster Guild will not meet
this evening but Mrs. Adams will
be at home and anyone wishing to
stop in for tea may do so.
Thespians meet in men’s lounge
of Gerlinger hall at 7:45 Thursday
evening. Send substitute if mem- I
ber cannot attend. Important.
Alpha Delta Sigma special meet
ing 5 p. m. today in Mr. Thacher's
office. Please bring Krazy Kopy
Krawl tickets and money. Import
ant.
Temonids picture for ‘the Ore
gana will be taken today at 12:40
at the east entrance of Condon
hall. All members must be there
promptly.
Press conference. Faculty mem- .
bers desiring to attend the Uni
versity luncheon for Press confer
ence delegates on Saturday, Janu
ary 24, at 1 o’clock, should make
reservations at Local 247 before
noon Friday.
A Decade Ago
Wednesday, January 19, 1921
“ 'Tis better to smoke here than
hereafter,” is one of the captions
adorning a new bench which was
mysteriously put under the nico
I tine tree for the benefits of all
undergrads. It is thought that the
bench was donated by a powerful
secret organization under the name
of Alpha Sigma Sigma.
Dr. Victor Andres Belaitnde, Pe
ruvian professor, will deliver a
i lecture on the campus next week.
Coach Bohler will take six play
ers on northern trip,
* * *
Sculpturing class is working on
the design over the doorway on
the new art building.
HALL SAYS PROGRESS
RESTS ON .SENSE USE
(Continued from Page One)
such as this should be avoided, he
declared.
Dr. Hall's talk, which was re
I ceived with enthusiasm, was spiced
with humor and anecdotes, and at
no time bordered on the pessimis
tic. Although deploring the fact
that schools and institutions of
higher education are, in his opin
ion, still neglecting the study of
politics and principles of govern
ment, proper application of com
mon sense can win out in affairs
today, Dr. Hall said.
Learn to Fly
Under Expert Instruction
Special rales offered to University students. Come and
investigate the ground school classes now being
organized.
Call Springfield 193-W or Write
SPRINGFIELD SCHOOL OF FLYING,
INC.
SPRINGFIELD MUNICIPAL AIRPORT
Virgil Langtry—I don't know
much about it except that I guess
it’s all right, if it helps ’em to
finally get through college.
* * *
Monte Wolf—I think that it will
be a dismal failure for the follow
ing reasons: The poor people are
exploited, the power is in the
hands of publicity hounds and
grafters, and there is an undue
amount of graft and theft going
on which only the heads get in on.
* * *
Loren Buell—I don’t think much
of it. It'll probably succeed about
the same time I get through col
lege.
Ralph David—It stands an ex
cellent chance of succeeding. It
might not succeed in this country,
but I am of impression that sev
; eral individual phases of it, such
as its production plan and plan of
distribution, would help us in our
present depression.
Green Lantern
For the Best
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“Sez Sue
A personal study of the specialties in
many lines ... it is a chance for you
to see a review of the wonderful bar
gains shown by these merchants.
Read the “Sez Sue” column every
Friday ... it will save you time and
money . . . two of the essentials in
your school career.
Oregon Daily Emerald