©tBgmt lailg gmstalfc
University of Oregon, Eugene
SOL ABRAMSON, Editor
EDITORIAL BOARD
EARL W. SLOCUM, Manager
Ray Nash . Managing Editor
Ronald Sellers .. Associate Mnsr. Ed.
Harold Mangum . sports nanor
Philippa Sherman . Feature Editor
News and Editor Phones, 656
BUSINESS STAFF
Calvin Horn . Associate Manager
Milton George . Advertising Manager
Sam Kinley . Advertising Manager
Ed Boss _ Foreign Advertising Manager
Herbert Lewis . Ass’t. Advertising Mgr.
Irancis McKenna . oircuiawon manager
Bob Dutton .... Ass't. Circulation Manager
Joe Neil, Ruth Street —.....
. Specialty Advertising
Alice McGrath . Specialty Advertising
Roberta Wells . Office Administration
Day Editor This Issue— Bee Harden
Night Editor This Issue— Clarence Curtis
Assistant— Bill Haggerty
The Oregon Daily Emerald, official publication of the Associated Students of
the University of Oregon, Eugene, issued daily except Sunday and Monday during
the college year. Member of Pacific Intercollegiate Press. Entered in the postoffice
•t Eugene, Oregon, as second-class matter. Subscription rates, $2.50 per year. Adver
tising rates upen application. Residence phone, editor, 2293-L; manager, 1320.
Business office phone, 1895.
Unsigned comment in this column is written by the editor. Full responsibility
in assumed by the editor for all editorial opinion.
«<T7'VEN if all education were
Jt-'free up to the highest, young
people, unless they were radic
ally reformed by the Anarchist
regime, would not want more
than a certain amount of it.”—
Bertrand Itussel.
Hall, Cfo*'"-'
Here are the Frosh
THE sacrificial freshman lamb has
been burned on the altar of
tradition, and tho voracious sopho
more war gods have been appeased.
Bet the wheels of the University
again start their turning. The green
material has been beaten into shape.
Now the machine can turn out its
grist.
How the gods must have giggled
and guffawed! It was such fun!
Those funny boys with paint-smear
ed faces and bruised hands and legs
looked so subdued. And here and
there some freshman who doubted
the sanctity of tho very noble tradi
tion was convinced of the error in
his thought process by means of a
paddle wielded by a husky, who
managed to keep from flunking out
of school last year because his gym
and military grades wore permitted
to count on tho necessary nine hours.
How could anyone object to such
pleasant boyish pranks? It was
enough to make anyone want to go
to college. Itis just like what the
movies show. Too bad the benefits
of a college education are open to
only a select few.
But do not forget tho seriousness
of the occasion. How solomn it was,
after all, when the freshmen bowed
as they donned their green caps and
resolved to do all in their power to
keep unblemished the sacred name of
Alma Mater. Yes, the solemn scene
almost brought forth tears. Won
derful, that spirit! It was neces
sary to force it upon a few of tho
boys, but then some neople never
know what is good for them.
The spirit of patriotism has taken
root in the hearts of Oregon’s “big
gest and best.” We are now assur
ed, thanks to the diligent sopho
mores, that there will be no monkey
wrenches thrown into the University
mill as it grinds out its grist.
Hail, Oregon, hail! Don’t you feol
the spirit of patriotism surging up
within you?
You don’t? Slacker! traitor! bet
ter men than you have been shot.
Bread and circuses? So that’s the
thanks you return for your educa
tional opportunities.
No! Not bread and circuses. Noth
ing quite that digestible. Circuses
and applesauce. That's us.
Be Happy, Professor,
Popularity is Near
AN automobile, nice clothes and
a healthy allowance are enough,
according to usual college stan
dards, to make any male student
popular. If the student is a woman,
vary this formula by substituting
curly hair for any of the preceding
qualifications. Add dancing ability
in both cases. But what is the se
cret of faculty popularity? Grades?
Sense of humor? Clothes?
For the good of the faculty, the
Emerald has gone to great length
to obtain tho answer. Nothing but
our friendship and admiration for
the deans, [professors, instructors,
and even tho graduate assistants
dictated this arduous task. The for
mula should mean as much to the
faculty as the Fountain of Youth
would have meant to Ponce de Leon
had he discovered that which did not
exist.
There is no charge for this ser
vice. The secret, which we obtained
from the Northwestern University
Scrawl, is known as the “Song of
the Popular Professor.” Draw up
your chair, teacher:
I’m the popular professor of the
universitee,
And I’m known among the students
for my personalitee.
When my lectures are concluded loud
applause is always heard,
I infer such popularity surely must
be deserved.
Of tho classes on the campus, nonc’s
a fifth as largo as mino
—Which proves that all the virtues
of five teachers I combine.
If a popular professor you have any
wish to bo
(Tho method is quite simple), take
theso formulae from me:
Dismiss five minutes early and ar
rive five minutes late;
Have your hair mad.e sleek; and
curly, and wear clothes right up
to-date.
Tell the class about your tennis
games and pastimes energetic,
Or any other applesauce to make
you seem athletic;
Be ready to emit a joke at slightest
provocation,
But never to the subject let it have
the least relation.
All these precepts closely follow,
and I’ll guarantee you’ll be
The most popular professor of the
universitee.
As Others
See it
Staid Oxford and Cambridge Yield
Recruits to Radicalism
(Now York Times)
Oxford and Cambridge, despite
their ancient Tory traditions, con
tinue to provide the British radical
party with recruits from the wealthy
and aristocratic classes. Viscount
Knnsmore, Id year old heir of the
Karl of Listowel, is the latest to
join the Fabian Society at Oxford
and to announce his intention of
preparing for a political career iu
the Labor party after graduation.
No longer is the young Briton’s
political creed settled by the circum
stances of birth and tradition. The
Tory and Liberal parties no longer
regard nature’s handiwork with the
Gilbert Sullivan humor of “Iolan
the":
l often think it’s comical
How nature always does contrive,
That every boy and every gal,
That’s born into this world alive,
Is either a little Liberal
Or else a little Conservative.
Many brilliant young recruits, have
joined the Labor party during their
undergraduate careers, the most note
worthy being Premier Baldwin’s
•on and Oswald Moseley, who mar
ried Lord Curzon’s daughter and
converted her to his Socialist crceS.
The Fabian Society, still virtually
the “brains” of the Labor party,
was founded at the end of tho Vic
torian era by George Bernard Shaw,
Mr. and Mrs. Sydney Webb, G. K.
Chesterton, Hilaire Belloe, and other
intellectuals to make a scientific sur
vey of social and economic condi
tions in Britain. These findings were
published in a series of pamphlets,
and more than a few were penned
oy tne author of "Candida” and
“Joan.” Belloc and Chesterton left
the Fabians to start thu Guilds
movement, but this organisation has
waned in power.
Oxford and Cambridge, especially
since the war, have beeomo nurseries
of intellectual radicalism. Recently
the \ ice Chancellor of Oxford raised
a storm of criticism by exacting
from two undergraduates a promise
that they refrain from expressing
Socialist and Communist opinions
while they remained members of the
university. Since theso opinions
have always been freely expressed
in the Oxford and Cambridge
Unions, the undergraduate debating
societies, the ^ ice Chancellor be
came a target for endless protests.
But the Tories and the dwindling
Liberals can no longer regard La
bor's growth with Gilbertinn equa
nimity. When the Socialist Countess
ot Warwick, gave her mansion,
Kaston Lodge, at Dunmow, Essex, as
a summer school of politics frr the
Labor party, the Tories and Liberals
promptly offered counter-attractions
to the youth of Britain. And now,
with Labor and radical thought per
meating the once conservative quad
rangles of Oxford nudB Cambridge,
the older political parties are wor
ried.
Campus High Elects
Student Body Officers
Officers for the coming year were
elected at the last meeting of the
University high school student body.
Those who received offices are as
follows: Kermit Stevens, president;
Ernest Powers, vice-president; Juan
ita Kilborn, secretary; find Fred
Huntington, treasurer.
Tryouts will be held for yell lead
er and elections for that office and
sergeant-at-arms have been post
poned until the next meeting of the
student body.
Kt SEVEN
SEERS
SEVEN SEERS
INTRODUCING THE “FISH
EYE SONG.” BEGINNING: “I
FISH EYE HAD SOMEONE TO
LOVE ME.”
» • *
ETIQUETTE HINTS:
Shovel mouth full of beans. Wad
bread in tightly to hold beans. Ram
well with knife handle and sluice
down with half glass of water.
Kappa Kappa Kappa announces
that their frosh ■will wear the fa
miliar hooded costume this year.
“That isn’t Nice,” said the
Frenchman to the Yankee tourist as
a city loomed in the distance.
* * *
THE IDEAL COURSE:
F. W. S.
5 a, b, c Survey course I
in Necking . 3 3 3
43 a, b, c Necking
Laboratory . Ill
92 1, 2, 3 Principles of
Parking .. 4 4 4
2 a, b, c, Advanced
Pigging . 2 2 2
4 a, b, c History of
Petting .-. 4 4 4
55 a, b, c Physical Ed.
(canoeing) . 2 2
16 14 16
# * *
»»**«*■»**
* Why I love my tooth brush so *
* well: The one thing I have in *
* this world that nobody ever bor- *
* rows!
**#*»*»**
FOLKS WE CAN CONSCIENTI
OUSLY KILL:
The two guys who start the phono
graph and piano going while we are
in the phone booth.
* » *
ROBBERY OF PHI DELT HOUSE
Ted Larson collects the house bill.
DESCENDING DISCORDS
At open house Ray Nash, the
famed managing editor of the
Emerald, wished that, ho like women
could change his name. Today he
is receiving in his office fair co
ods under the title—Mr. Ash, Hash,
Cash, Mash, Rash, and Pash.
“WHAT A LIFE I LEAD”
MOANED A LITTLE FROSH AS
HE PUSHED A “HEAVY”
AROUND THE TRI DELT MAN
SION.
Bill James tells us that a certain
“party” at the Alphi Phi house
talked a leg off of him, but even
then he could dance better than
she.
Tin pan, tin can,
No wheel or brakes
Flat tiro limosine
That growns from its aches ;
Iyost!—one cut-out—
Runs on three
Collich kiddie kar—
Wheel Wheel Wheel
* * •
Question of the Day
Wo wonder if Eef eats at the
table with his Sigma Nu fraternity
brothers.
Definition of an Optimist—A
girl who expects to go with her big
love of the previous spring term
It is true spring is the young man’s!
fancy—in fall he doesn’t fancier.
“THIS IS MY HEY-DAY’’
CRIED THE FARMER. AS THE
SUN GAME OUT.
SEVEN SEERS
Diversions
from a
Penny Whistle
Here’s a penny’s-worth of space
given us to deliver ourselves blat
antly on a penny-whistle of this
and that, tempers and distempers—
crotchets, perchance—boojks per
force. Books, we see, must be vil
ified, adored, and hated—but, of
necessity, read. We bitterly regret!
their insidiousness, but confess help
lessness. And, reading them, we de
mand to talk about them in order
to persuade ourselves that iwe’re
resisting them—that we aren’t such
paltry peppercorn in the face of
them, anyway—in short, that we’re
pretty canny crpatures. (None of j
which persuasion we’ve enveigled to I
front-stage, to our resentment.) (
Lolly Willowes or
The Loving Huntsman
Here is a little book that blends
with the autumnal scene, from the
tail of its yellow leaf-like jacket
to its tale of a strange autumn
courtship. The pages rustle with the
same vague surrender that goes with
falling leaves; beneath the flat tones
of a woman’s settled life are seen
the brighter shafts of her secret
whims and fancies. Lolly Willowes,
in truth, spinster though she was,
had that maple-leaf personality—
one which soberly kept her close to
| the family branch during the spring
and summer of life, only in the
autumn to take on shocking, wine
dregged hues and at last, in a sin
gle scarlet gesture of release, let
go the steady twig of custom and
descend quite unattached to a sweet
earthen decay.
But simply because Lolly Wil
lowes.belongs to Autumn is no rea
son that its vista is drear. Indeed,
i the humor runs as freely as maple
j syrup and it has a bite not unlike
good cider, cider of some standing
and respectable maturity. Anyway,
how could such a blandishing title
as “Lolly Willowes” or “The Lov
ing Huntsman” forewarn of else
but drollery? The title like Romeo
and Juliet, and Franky and Johnny,
is one of those containing the names
of the hero and heroine. The Lov
ing Huntsman, however, steps into
our story with a good deal of back
ground and reputation. The reader
undoubtedly has heard of him long
before books were to be rented for
five cents a day. The gentleman
happens to be none other than His
Royal Slyness, Satan, Prince of
Darkness, the Devil, the Tempter,
Mephistopholies, Beelzebub, Old
Nick, the Dickens, and so on ad
insipidum. But the author of Lolly
Willowes introduces him as the Lov
ing Huntsman and ah! such care
less artifice, such indifferent aim,
but such—well—diabolic success he
does attain.
About Lolly Willowes herself, he
roine and spinster, one must not, I
however, entertain the ancient and'
fallacious (potions concerning Old
Maids, for it is largely a Fiction
that spinsters come from the wall
flower species, that bachelor girls
are the Kind that Men Forget, and j
that maiden ladies are secretly and j
eternally out for a Man. It is not
usually that the spinster has got
less out of life than the rest of us
but rather that she has sought for
more. Of such was Laura Wil
lowes. She had been one of those
children who are happiest when
alone. Later when there were young
men about she was given to curious
laughing comments or remarks that
were just “queer,” so people said, i
It was after her father’s death j
when Laura was living in London j
with her married brother that she j
-felt as one betrayed by life. “She
had actually a sensation that she |
was stitching herself into a piece of
embroidery, with a good deal of
background.” . . . “One day is so
like another that it’s just almost'
impossible to put salt on its tail.”!
“Their jaws were like so many!
mouse-traps baited with common-'
places.”
Her “queerest” moment comes;
when Lolly leaves her stodgy Lon
don family and removes to the i
strange village of Great Mop
“somewhere in the Chiltirns.” And
there takes place this maiden lady’s1
rendez-vous and assignation with
Satan. There is no explaining such
an alliance any more than one can
explain any kind of marriage. Lol
ly’s match gave her that same sat
isfaction, probably, that most brides
feel. Sho thinks to herself: “All
finalities, whether good or evil, be-,
stow a feeling of relief.”
All true marriages are written on
| ^jfhe largest selling
quality pencil
the world
Buy
a
dozen
Superlative in quality,
the world-famous
\7ENUS
Ypencils
give best service and
longest wear.
Plain cadi, per dor. $1.00
Rubber end*, per dor. 1.20
oAt all dealert
American Lead Pencil Co.
220 Fifth Ave., N.Y.
the heart. There are those shackled
to their ego, some to their work, a
few to their husbands, and still
fewer to other persons’ husbands.
Here on the heart is written the
true index of passion, for chastity
is no, indication of one’s love life.
Shastinty is really a universal prac
Ohastity is really a universal prac
lome persons obviously break the
iabit more often than othe s. It is
instead the secret conquests of the
fancy, the mating of moods—with
the weather, the wall-paper, or our
larger love-life. Lolly Willowes,
Jespite her sensible shoes and dis
creet sleeves, truly met her mate.
This then is no great book and no
significant 'story unless youj '“ad
mit the validity of small things”
such as the way the firelight dances
about the tea-pot, or that chestnuts,
like possums, hang by their tails.
WILFRED PUDDING
I CAMPUS'
.Bulletin
ANNOUNCEMENTS
Lost—A Chi Omega pin and guard
by Doris Meldrum, somewhere on
campus. Reward.
Anyone interested in a life saving
course should sign with Miss E. A.
Troemel immediately. The class
will be held at two o’clock on Tues
day and Thursday .
University band needs more play
ers. If you are interested report
at the R. O. T. C. building, at 4
o’clock, for daily practice.
Donut Basketball managers make
reservation for practice hours at
the Men’s gym at once.
Anyone interested in winning
fifty points for a W. A. A. sweater
by passing swimming honors should
see Miss Troemel this week.
Tryouts for Orchesis and dancing
honors in W. A. A. will be held in
the dancing room of the Woman’s
building on Monday and Tuesday,
October 11 and 12, at 5 o’clock. In
tensive practice will be held at 5
every day next week exclusive of
Wednesday. Students must have had
two term of educational interpre
tative dancing in order to qualify
for Orchesis. No such requirement
is made for W. A. A. honors. See
Miss Stupp of the physical educa
tion department for further infor
mation.
A class in Biblical literature meets
Tuesday at 3 p. m. and Friday at
4 p. m. at the Westminster house,
14th and Kincaid. No fees. Open to
all. Bruce. J. Giffen, University
pastor, instructor.
Business meeting of Alpha Kappa
Psi, 4:30 p. m. today. Koom 107
Commerce building.
Sigma Delta Chi meets' today
noon at the Anchorage.
W. A. A. Council meeting 7 p. m.
today at library Woman’s building.
Hoogstraten to Speak
At Music Symposium
Willem von Hoogstraten is to be
the principal speaker at the music
symposium held at 9 o’clock Thurs
day morning, during the week of
the Semi-Centennial celebration.
There are to be two symposiums
daily on various subjects, Thurs
day being devoted to music and fine
arts. At each of these meetings,
which are to be held in the audi
torium of the school of music build
ing, there will be programs by mem
bers of the music faculty.
Following the music symposium,
the annual pledge day assembly will
be called at 10:30, at which time
the Semi-Centennial song, “O Pio
neers,” composed by Rex Under
wood will be presented.
Your own private stock/
I _ •
So far as writing goes, that’s exactly what
you get in the Eversharp Utility Unit.
A year’s supply of erasers [6], Eversharp
Red Top leads [6 tubes], and a genuine
orange-enameled Eversharp pencil [i] that
will last you from now on.
You get them all in the smart little red
and gold box — a dollar fo5 bits’ worth
[$1.50] for a single smack [$1.00]. It’s a
bargain, and you can shake your good write
hand on that!
This is the only time we’ll run this big
convincing ad in this great family journal
about the Eversharp Utility Unit. More
over, there’s only a limited stock at your
dealer’s. So make up your mind to get
your year’s supply right now.
Line forms at the Eversharp and Wahl
Pen counter.
Eversharp Utility Unit
1 Enameled Eversharp, value .... $0.50
6 Tubes Eversharp Red Top Leads (18
sticks in tube, total 108 sticks), value . .90
6 Eversharp Erasers, value.10
Total value.$1.50
Limited Time Offer, $1.00
PVmSHARP
the name is on the pencil
PEN
UTILITY’S THE WORD
I’m useful, too. And I go along with every Ever
sharp, whether it’s the 50-center, the case-note utility,
or the month’s allowance gold one. Also free. Pick
me up at the Eversharp and Wahl Pen Counter.
© 1926, The Wahl Company, Chicago ~WALLY, the Eversharp Kid
o
N campus or off campus, rain
or shine, night or day, a Stetson is
the smartest hat and the longest lived.
STETSON HATS
Styled for young men
k
k
<♦
k
f*
J»
!♦
!♦
k
k
k
k
k
k
k
k
k
k
k
k
k
rrV'
Wade Bros.
Exclusive Stetson Dealers
EUGENE
’Say, talk about good
Waffles! What’s better than
a good hot one served with
rich golden butter, syrup
and only 15cts.
Electric Toastwich
Shoppe
(Colonial Theatre Bldg.)
i
Women’s
Gym Shoes
White duck trimmed
in black, crepe rub
ber sole.
$2.00
828 Willamette 828