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Edward M. Miller . Edltor
SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 13, 1926
Frank H. Loggan
Manager
Sol Abramson .. Managing Editor
Mildred Jean Carr .... Associate Man. Editor
“Maws and Editor Phones. 6^ 5
Harold Kirk - Associate Editor
Webster Jones . Sports Editor
Philippa Sherman . Feature Editor
Wayne Leland .. Associate Manager
Businss Office Phone
1895
Day Editors
Esther Davis
Geneva Drum
Frances Bourhill
Claudia Fletcher
Mary Conn
John Black
Earl Raess
Night Editors
Kay Nash, Chief Night Editor
Ronald Sellars
Bill Haggerty
Harold Mangum
Sports Staff
Ricnard Syring
Bernard Shaw
Feature Writers
Walter Cushman
Upper News Staff
Mary Benton Kuth Grew?
Edward Smith Jane Dudley
Margaret Vincent
Mary K. Baker
Jack Hempstead
Barbara Blythe
Arthur Priaulx
Minnie Fisher
Lylah McMurphy
William Schulze
Pauline Stewart
Grace Fisher
Beatrice Harden
Frances Cherry
Margaret Hensley
News Staff
James Leake
Ruby Lister
Genevieve Morgan
Marion Sten
Dick Jones
Miriam Shepard
Flossie Radabaugh
Margaret Long
Allen Canfield
Edith Dodge
Wilbur Lester
Eva Nealon_
Business Staff
Si Slocum ___ Advertising Manager
Calvin Horn ..— Advertising Manager
Milton George _ Assistant Advertising Manager
Advertising Assistants: Sam Kinley, Paul Sletton,
Emerson Haggerty, Bob Nelson, Vernon McGee, Ed
Ross, Ruth McDowell, Dick Hoyt, Webster Jones.
Marian Phy .. Foreign Advertising Manager
James Manning .... Circulation Manager
Alex Scott .. Assistant Circulation Manager
Frances McKenna ..... Circulation Assistant
Mabel Fransen, Margaret Long-Specialty Advertising
Office Administration: Herbert Lewis, Frances Hare,
Harold Whitlock, Geneva Drum._
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Day Editor—Frances Bourhill
Night Editor—Allan Canfield
Assistant—Joe Sweyd
When Revenge Is No Sin;
O. A. C. versus Oregon—Basketball
All Oregonians will recall the varsity’s hair-raising basket
ball career last year. After keeping everyone m suspense tor
the entire season by just barely catching the Northwest Cham
pionship Limited a half dozen times, the Oregon men, after a
heart-breaking play-off series, finally found themselves under
the sharp 0. A. C. heel to the tune of one point. Bitter pill.
“Revenge is sweet; and remorse is terrible, said a wise
man once upon a time. The Emerald dislikes to be discourteous
to the maxim-makers of the good old days, but it suggests that
on the O. A. C. basketball floor tonight the Oregon varsity, it
victorious, will have revenge, and there won’t be any remorse,
either.
Short Essay on College Editors;
World’s Greatest Tear Slingers
A few remarks bordering on the personal for a moment or
two; being an attempt at vivid introspection.
College editors are not interested in what is right—they
want to know what is wrong. That is, what is wrong is right,
and what is right isn’t interesting. And if they haven’t some
thing to cry about they aren’t happy. .
For instance: The editor of the “Oberlin Review is cry
ing because the Oberlin curriculum is obsolete; the. U. of
Washington Daily” editor is crying for a student union; the
“University Daily Kansan” editor is crying because of sus
pieioned dirty politics among the women; the “Montana Kai
min” editor is crying because of the recent degradation of the
word “collegiate;” the “Daily Trojan” editor of U. S. C. is
crying because of the severe basketball refeiees.
And now the Oregon Daily Emerald editor is crying because
there aren’t enough things around here to cry about.
Concerning the Irreligious Collegians;
A Few Words in Their Defense
Can’t we summarize the religious, or rather the irreligious,
Bituation in American Universities somewhat in this manner:
Religion, while of the supernatural, is practical in its applica
tions. A religion that comforts a mother when she has lost her
son, or eases the grief of a wife when she has lost her husband,
or makes old age serene, or urges man to the utmost of his
potentialities, cannot be said to he idle or useless in this busi
ness of living a life. A man’s religion, when he jumps head
long into the intense joys and sorrows of genuine living, be
comes of real and tangible substance to him. Those who suffer
the most, we know, are often the most devout and the most
sincere in their religious thoughts and actions.
But how much “real life” has the collegian found? The
average undergraduate knows little of death; knows little of
disappointment and loss of sorrow. He has his parents, has
practically nothing to be sorry for, has a beckoning future
ahead, and has wants that are fulfilled, usually, not by faith,
but by the pocketbook. His world, through no fault of his own,
is not real in the larger sense. Ilis whole existence, for four
years, is artificial.
■Withhold judgment on this man for a few years. Let him
rub shoulders with life and death and sorrow; let him become
—shall we say—practical. Let him be utterly lonesome for a
time. Then a spirit of reverence will not be lacking; for often
times the severest, of jolts is required to jar loose the finest of
sensibilities.
Speedy Correction of the
Infirmary Situation
When the unsatisfactory condition of the University infir
mary became evident the health authorities set about immed
iately to secure an additional nurse and better housing facil
ities. This action, coupled with a sudden check of the mumps
epidemic, has alleviated the crowded condition of the infirmary
to a large extent; and parents of University students may be
reasonably well assured that proper care will be given infir
mary patients. Under present plans a new infirmary will be
provided in the near future. >
Another Suggestion;
Concerning University Commencement
“A suggestion a day fills the space we say,” might be the
chant of editorial writers; and according to certain well-known
neighborly wits of ill-repute, a suggestion a day results in at
least two committees of investigation. Be that as it may, here
is another suggestion that is worthy of several committees.
University commencement, the Emerald believes, should he
held before the June dismissal of the major portion of the Uni
versity. As matters now stand, Seniors nre graduated in great
solitude and seclusion with no eyes other than their own and a
few alumni to watch the impressive graduation ceremonies. It
has been suggested that the sight of seniors graduating might
act as a spur to many undergraduates: might provide a sense
of reality and desircabilitj to the occasion, which at the pres
ent time, judging from the mortality of students, is somewhat
lacking. The various ceremonies, it has been said, are heauti- j
fnl and inspiring. Never having seen one we can’t offer a per-j
sonal opinion.
This is a reminder to the University registrar that students
are awaiting with interest the departmental segregation of
grades for the fall term. Some illuminating evidence on the
theory’ and practice of grading was brought to light by the
recent publication of the spring 1925 grades. All are anxious to
know whether publicity has checked undue severity and un
warranted leniency in certain departments. Don’t keep us in
suspense, Mr. Registrar.
Oregon meets O. A. C. in varsity swimming this afternoon
at 2:30 in the Woman’s building. Some letters may be won.
Why not be on hand to give the boys a cheer!
SEVEN SEERS
THE DREAM DEPARTMENT
By Prof. Adam Knecker
Dear Prof:
The other night after the
dime brawl I went up to bed all
tired out. I dreamed all night
long and felt very tired the
next morning. I dreamed over
and over again that my room
mates Were dropping stove lids,
flat irons, and many other ar
ticles upon my feet.
Please explain.
ANXIOUS ANNABELLE.
Ans.: Good enough for you
Aninabelle, you ought to know
better by this time than to
dance more than one Charleston
with Georgia Schade.
A TRUE STORY
I am about to tell you an exper
ience which happened to me last
evening. What I tell here is true,
I make no inferences, I merely state
the facts. Interpret them to suit
yourself.
At about 11:30 I started making
footprints toward my boudoir and
as I neared the S. A. E. house I was
startled by a pistol shot. Listening
carefully I heard the muffled voices
of men coming from the rear of the
aforementioned house. Here is all
that I could make out: “Don’t
shoot, I’ll carry the water.”
EPITAFFY
Beneath the sod
Lies Johnnie Peek,
He told a friend,
“Your date will neck.”
This bier contains
The last remains
Of foolish Sammie Prue;
When Freddie said
“Give Billy three,”
' He bawled out, “Billy who?”
1 Customer—I want to buy a new
corset.
Salesman—What bust?
'Customer—'Bust nothing. It just
wore out.
SPIRITS! M
Spirit Medium—Madam, if you
wish to converse with your dead
husband, just ask any question you
wish to through this megaphone.
Your husband’s spirit will answer
them by tapping. One rap means
no; two raps means yes.
“John, do you hear my voice?”
KNOCK—KNOCK
“Are you happier now than you
were when you were here on
earth?”
KNOCK—KNOCK
“John, are you in heaven.”
KNOCK
THE HEIGHT OF LAZINESS
The man who uses gunpowder
for snuff when he wants to blow
his nose.
The barber who holds his
razor still and asks his customer
to wiggle his face.
We question the popularity bf
Jack Renshaw at the Alpha Omi
cron house. The girls have taken
the davenport to the back yard for
his special benefit and on the sunny
days he spends his afternoons
basking in the sunshine.
If you can stand this nuig of m,ine,
Then I will be vour Valentine.
IDA BELLE TREYMANE.
SEE YOU AT BAND PRACTICE.
SINBAD.
<>—---o
Coming Events
i \
Saturday, February 13
2:30 Swimming meet, var
sity vs. O. A. C., Woman’s
' building tank.
10:00-12:00—-Junior class skat
ing party, Winter Garden.
Basketball, Varsity vs. O.
I A. C. Corvallis.
Sunday. February 14
4:30-5:00— Vesper services,
Music auditorium.
February 10 to 19
Exhibition, art work of Clara
Jane Stevens, Portland artist.
! Museum of Art building.
«*>-<$>
0[i!e(P)atttelwm
BY JIM
No intention to cast our unwash
ed opinion into the hopper with
Tom Graham concerning religion on
the University of Oregon campus.
Born a Catholic, falling in love with
a Baptist, and with genuine sym
pathy extended to the Head Hunt
ers of Guam, our thoughts are
rather garbled. But we have a few
fertile notions on the thing.
Now Graham contends that the
burden of the blame for the indif
ference evidenced by our present
generation concerning religious mat
ters rests with the churches. “They
(the children), have never been
taught that there is anything more
to religion than singing a few
hymns, enduring a sermon, and put
ting a penny in the collection box,”
says he. Bight here is where we
can prove that he is all wrong.
Witness the following advertise
ment:
UNCLE SAM
In Person
In Costume
Will Speak
Onofre Hipe Will Play on a
Musical Saw
The above is an excerpt from an
advertisement running last Satur
day in the “Oregon Daily Emerald,”
announcing the fact that a special
Boy Scout service will be held by
the First Congregational Church of
Eugene.
How can he make such a state
ment when all over the nation there
is a movement to vaudevillize our
churches? If the attendance is good
I am told that they may stretch
the Sabbath into a full week. But
Graham’s contention that the
churches should both arouse and sat
isfy the curiosity of our iminds is
a good one. The churches are try
ing to do this now but they are
going to get into trouble if they
let the thing develop. Just by way
of playing with the idea suppose it
should run rampant—I mean this
vaudeville-sormon thing.
• • •
Next Sunday night. Come and
bring your friends. Dr. Dinvviddie
and three good acts.
“Friends, it is good to see such a
large and intelligent congregation
here tonight. The first act in the
services is directly from the Salem
Opera House and is called Berstein’s
Trained Goats and Geese. It is an
animal act and will present the les
son of Noah and the flood.
“Now the next act, working in
the deuce spot, is Tully and Mc
Bride. Give these boys a hand,
BELL THEATRE
SPRINGFIELD—SUNDAY
AOOIPM lUHOfl mt |t$se L LA!
/
Gloria
i
friends. They have just signed for
60 weeks on the West Coast Circuit
and will speak on eternal punish
ment.”
“That was very, very good. Now,
for the third act, we have a big sur
prise. These little ladies who take
part in the next numlber can’t sing
or dance or act. But they will bring
home an important lesson. I take
pleasure in introducing Peggy Joyce
and Ganna Walska, dressed in their
gems and giving an imitation of
the pearly gates.
* * *
“Now, brethren, the time has
come for solemn things. So I will
call on A1 Jolson. In his inimitable
mammy songs, Mr. Jolson will get
down on his knees and lead the con
gregation in prayer.”
But, seriously, Mr. Graham, isn’t
that just the sort of things the
churches of today realize and are
trying to put over in a nauseating
manner? Do we want to be led to
religion by curiosity and trickery
or do we want to be lead by the
awakening that in religion there is
tranquility, comfort, and a human
and divine sympathy?
P.I.P.A.News
Bulletins
SOUTHERN CALIFORNIA, Feb.
12.—The majority of the Wampus
staff, acting ab a unit, resigned
last Friday when the executive com
mittee selected a man not -connected
with the staff, as editor. The com
mittee acted following two weeks
of criticism of the fun publication
by the country press.
In the face of the present hos
tility, the new editor will find the
position of master jokesmith no
laughing matter.
* *' »
UNIVERSITY OF CALIFORNIA,
Feb. 12.—Plans are being made for
the formation of a new glee club
to replace the old one, resigned.
No members of the old club will be
included. At the time of their re
signation they took pledges not to
join any new milsical club on the
campus.
* » »■
UNIVERSITY OF BBITISH CO
LUMBIA, Feb. 12.—In an effort to
stimulate composition of varsity
songs and yells the Booters’ club
is carrying on a campaign among
the students. Heretofore the col
lege has had only one yell and no
hymn. A prize has been offered
for the best song or yell. Song
books of other colleges are being
collected in an effort to find new
ideas.
* * »■
SOUTHERN CALIFORNIA, Feb.
12.—Dedication services for the new
law school were held last Friday,
with delegates and guests from
every state in the Union attending
the ceremonie^. Among the speak
era was Miss Mabel Walker Wille
brandt, assistant attorney general of
the United States. Honorary de
grees were conferred upon Dean
Kirkland, Jesse William Curtis, and
Dr. James Brown Scott.
» # »
UNIVERSITY OF CALIFORNIA,
Feb. 12.—The first spring produc
tion of the University Little Thea
tre was given here last week-end.
The cast for the play, which was
J. M. Barrie’s “What Every Wom
an Knows,” was chosen from a pub
lic speaking class.
STATE COLLEGE OF WASH
INGTON, Feb. 10.—(P.I.P.)— A
ping pong tournament is being
staged next week by the Y. M. C.
A. The growing popularity of the
sport is evidenced by the announce
ment that another ping pong table
would be added to the “Y” rooms.
"HH*1
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Special This Week— f
‘Valentine Special’
Brick
Strawberry Pink Heart Center
Surrbunded with Vanilla
Ice Cream
Bulk
Tropical Fruit Ice Cream
Eugene Fruit Growers
Association
PHONE 1480
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I “The Unchurched Lincoln”!
Sermon by the Rev. Frank Fay Eddy at the Unitarian Church
Sunday morning at 10:45
SOLOIST—MARION LYNN
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IlnHilllllinlKl'IB
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An Opportunity for Oregon
Students to Get
Direct Returns from
| the Basketball Game
Tonight
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Through Arrangements Made With
Carl Lodell, Graduate Manager, O.
A. C., We Have Installed a Direct
Wire in the Basketball Court at Cor
vallis and Will Announce the
Play-by-Play Returns
of the Game the Same Minute
as They Happen
Fred Martin, Yell King, Will Be in Charge
of the Corvallis End and
Will Keep Us Posted as Play Progresses
Returns Will Be Received and
Immediately Megaphoned at This End
by Bobbie Warner Who
Will Also Lead the Yelling During the Game
Every One Is Invited—There Is
no Charge for Admission
Reports Will Begin Coming in About 7:25
and Will Continue Until the Game Closes
Come and Get First Hand Knowledge
as to Just How Oregon
Is Winning from the Aggies
Ye Campa Shoppe
V ♦♦♦
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