(0n>gmt Uailg fmeralii fiiitonal Page
Edward M. Miller ...-.... Editor
SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 7, 1925
Sol Abramson . Managing Editor Harold Kirk ... ^Bnortl Editor
Jahnar Johnson .. Associate Managing Editor Webster Jor.es .-.•_ P. „...
News and Editor Phones, 655
Philippa Sherman .. Feature Editor
Frank H. ioggan .-. Manager
Wayne Leland .-. Associate Manager
Business Office Phone
1895
Wilbur Wester
Mildred Carr
Esther Davis
Day Editors
Alice Kraeft
John O'Meara
Geneva Drum
Frances Bourbill
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Night Editors
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John Black
Sports Writers: Dick Godfrey and Dick Syrin*.
Feature Writers: Bernard Shaw, James De Pauli,
and Walter Cushman.
Upper News Staff
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Claudia Fletcher
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Barbara Blythe
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News Staff
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Frances Cherry
Arthur Pr'aulx
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Mary Conn, Mable Franson .... Specialty Advertising
Office Administration: Marion Phy, Herbert Lewis,
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ne™em”8°M£n“ber WSdlfc*’'inMe^ate^rV.^A^tetlo^ Entered in *e poZm'cJ at^u^Or^cT'^^ond-clL, matter. Subscription rates, $2.25 per
year^C Advertising rates upon application. Phones Editor, 1820; Manager, 721. __________
Day Editors—Alice Kraeft, Trances Bourhill
Night Editor—John Black
Assistant—Lawrence Ogle
L
An Open Letter to
Colonel John Leader
Dear Colonel:
We were mighty glad to receive your
letter- Of course, we were grieved to
hear of your head-cracking trip, but as
long as you are safe in the hands of the
Bobbies and the Reds we know' all will
be well. We hasten to assure you that
you are still the Emerald’s foreign cor
respondent and that you did very well in
your first dispatch. We shall anticipate
with pleasure further special news notes
from you.
• • • •
By the bye, Colonel, have you seen Colin and
Mrs. Pymeut any place over there? They are
loose with only a couple of bicycles and we
are wondering how they are getting along. If
you see them, tell them, to come home, or at
least drop us a card.
• • • •
You say England is frankly Red. Well
you haven’t anything on us. We are
Red and Blue and Green and Yellow and
Pink and all the rest of the pigments per
sonified. It’s the thing nowadays to be
deck yourself in brilliant colors; and he
who doesn’t put himself in a screaming
slicker or flaming “sweate or prespira
tion shyrte, ’ ’ as the Seers say, is sadly out
of things. At the moment I have on a
white “shyrte” but shall have it dyed red
this week end. With my new Stetson
flat-topped sombrero which the Seniors
have recently adopted, I’m sure I shall be
quite irresistible and quite broke.
• • • •
To tell the truth, Colonel, wo’ve been bo busy
with Stetsons anti Frosh presidents and football
and the rest of it that wo haven’t had time to
w*orry about trifles like unemployment in Eng
land or moral degradation of which you speak;
in fact we haven’t even realized that the fall
term is precisely one-half over.
* • * •
Speaking of moral degradation—next
week-end is Homecoming. From all that
we can gather, it’s going to be a grand
celebration. .Tames Leake is chairman
of the affair. Under his direction several
new features are being introduced, amiong
them a pajamrine parade with brilliant
torches and green and yellow pajamas.
He who doesn’t own a lemon-yellow noc
turnal dress suit is going to feel as lone
some as the person with the sweate
shyrte.
# * # •
The slogan this year is “Back—to Back our
Oregon,” but I’ve heard fraternity people say
that it would bo more truthful if it had been,
“Back to Back—Our Oregon.”
# * * •
Dope has it that 0. A. C. is going to
take the Homecoming game. However,
I’m not worrying about any dope on that
game, and 1 'in of the opinion that Ore
gon will carry off the honors. We’re
dreadfully sorry you can’t be with us
this year, Colonel. There’s going to be
a huge crowd on hand- We have a fine
new' grandstand, you know.
# ‘ * I
And mention of the “new” reminds me of the I
Frosh. Certainly they are a very- presentable
group of young people, although I believe the
new men have the edge over the first year ladies
in that respect.
• • • »
But l must cease. Thanks again for
the letter, Colonel, and pardon the ex
travagant rambling. I’ll try to be a bit
more profound next time.
Sincerely,
THE EMERALD EDITOR.
^ ___-o
From Colonel Leader
_____o
3, Whitehall Place,
London, S. W. 1.
23rd October, 1925.
The Editor
“The Emerald.”
Dear Sir: „
Yesterday I received the first number of the
“Emerald” which acted on me like a ray ot
sunshine on a murky day. I give my perman
ent address above, for the benefit of Oregonians
who propose coming next year to this island ot
mist. It is recalled to my mind that some years
ago Art Rudd created me foreign correspondent
of the “Emerald” so I will endeavor to resume
my painfully neglected duties.
We had rather a hectic journey back to Eng
land. Near Ottawa the Trans-Canada Express,
doing sixty miles an hour, hit another train
face on, in the grey dawn, and as my head re
bounded from my drawing room partition the
first words I heard were those of my Oregonian
son, now aged three, who betrayed his low
origin by ejaculating, “I’ve cracked my G—
D— Cocoanut” (I am trusting to the Editor to
put this in more lady-like language). My three
sons are now being trained in the three elemen
tary duties of our caste, viz., fox-hunting, fish
ing, and shooting. My eldest son started his
shooting career well by getting his grandmother
and one of the gardners with a right and left;
however, neither were clean kills and apparently
he badly frightened the pheasant he fired at,
so all was well.
* * * »
I have not yet got over the reverence that
everyone coming first to England acquires, for
the London policeman, affectionately known as
the “Bobby.” He is quite the most efficient
thing in the world and I reckon that the Al
mighty made him in his image. In my kaleido
scopic career the most efficient classes of men
I have ever served with were the cowpunchers
of the West, the “Red Riders” of Canada, and
the British subaltern, but all those are efficient
in a tight place, the London Bobby is always
efficient—even in his sleep, I guess.
England is now most frankly Bed and bodies
of British Fascisti are forming everywhere. I
dined recently with two members of our Govern
ment and told them that when I was in the
Government I proposed adopting Napoleon’s
idea that ‘‘the only cure for Radicalism was a
whiff of grape-shot.” They asked mo what I
would suggest at prosent, (or perhaps I volun
teered the information) first, that we should
ask tho U. 8. A. to administer us as a Territory
until we were fit to govern ourselves or sec
ondly, that wq should lot Italy off her war debt
on •condition they let us have Mussolini as dic
tator of England for a year. Neither of my
suggestions were received with enthusiasm. No
body wants to work, as out-of-work doles are
paid up to 5f> shillings, equivalent to about 30
dollars in America, and as the ordinary wage
is only a dollar a week more, England may now
be called a Loafer’s Paradise. Education is now
costing England over $400,00,0,0,00 dollars a
year and it is a regrettable fact that this coun
try, the mother of mass education, is beginning
to more and more to realize that mass education
instead of fructifying the desert has only over
whelmed the oases.
To a student of history, especially that of the
decline of great empires, the most distressing
sign of all is the growth of “Intelligentsia”
clubs at the Universities. They are popularly
and very suitably known as “Offal” clubs, and
are composed of young men whoso mental level
is one attained about 35 years ago, and whose
physical standard one hopes not to sink to—
about 35 years hence. Here callow “Cogno
scenti” gather together and discuss the Red rub
bish of Marx and Rousseau and Voltaire, tho
heavy platitudes of old Plato, the sour atheism
of Anatolc France and the frank sewerage of
the discredited Freud and the equally uninform
ed Dreissler and Dostoivsky, writers \^ho pour
their inky souls on paper with tho exultant ges
tures of an exuding cuttlefish. In an age which
stands out as the most brilliant in the world's
history for contemporary literature the main
modern fiction read by our youth are writers
of the Arlen school portraying the degradation
of immoral and neurotic but otherwise uninter
SEVEN SEERS !
^
The results of this -week’s limerick contest
First Prize
We all know the man Eddie Miller
Whom women all fear as a killer,
When you say that he’s rough,
You’re not saying enough,
FOB HE’S THE OLD-FASHION GORILLER.
Evidently the person who signed his mark to.
this hit of lyric is ashamed of it, for he wrote
C. Henri S. and let it go at that. Will the
gentleman please step forward to the Emerald
editor’s office Monday and receive three (3)
passes free (FREE) to the McDonald theatre
for Monday or Tuesday?
Second Prize
HE SURPASSES THE LATE MR. VILLA
Robert Jackson, whp won the first prize last
time is again a lucky 'man. (Note: Please em
ploy Southern pronunciation to make rhyme.)
Third Prize
Third prize goes to Margaret Thompson, who
likewise has a southern accent:
He’s a rough as the tough Armadariller
G Hosafat 'wishes know
who the brooksy boys are
who port the nifty waffle
hats of model 1920, high
school variety. It is whis-j
pered they’re the boys of
sigma Alpha Epsilon
(Big Alph’).
W. & 0., Pullman, Wash., Nov. 5, 1925.—
Because of the cold weather many profes
sors are permitting students to scratch dur
ing class hours this week. Howlever, it must
be understood that this little favor will
cease as soon as the students becomes accus
tomed to their red flannels.
****************
THE DEBATE
Ladies, Gentlemen, and Faculty Members:
I red my unworthy opponent’s speach, which
he rote in to the Seers, and I think he has a
small mined or something, or he wud not so
disgrace the nobull cow but compareing the
same with the equine. He sed the hoarse Was
the herow .of Oregon. Maybe so, but the cow
is not only the national sherow of O. A. C., but
if it had not bin for this most nobullest of ani
inules, the grate institushun of O. A. C. wud
never have bin found. There wud have bin
nothing for the stewdents to do.
Mr. rivall spoak abqut the use of tjie
hoarse at Oregon. Over at O. A. C. the fel
lers do with a cow what none of yew cain’t
do with yure old hayburner. They milk
their cow bofour brekfast, and then ride her
to wurk. They wurk her all day, ride her
home, and then milk her again. When she
gits two old fer this, they kill her, and sell
the meat to the hamburger joint fer more
kale than they give fer her in the furst
place. When yew git a hoarse that yew kin
do all this with. I’ll buy a couple or so.
My opposer cast reflcckshuns on the name
Cowmen. What name cud be niser? I doant
think he ever gazzed into the soft brown eyes
of the bewtifull Holstine, or herd the mclodius
voice of the Guernsey heffer. He cud not, and
tak the side that he has.
Hoping to win, I shall rest till next week.
Yures expectantley,
HIRAM CORNCRUELLER.
POPULAR BALLADS
So wo took tho fifty thousand bottles
And sold them to the Sigma Nus.
SEVEN SEERS.
esting young women. Hughes, the Australian
premier once said to me that “Maggots only
hurt a moribund body, a healthy body can throw
them off”—what England needs now is a bit
more of the “Mill-Race” spirit of dealing with
decadents. If Bob Mautz was not handicapped
by a clean mind, he could buy cheap translations
of these alleged classics and easily acquire the
jargon of complexes and reactions, but I never
met an “Intelligentsia” yet with brains enough
to captain a football team. Arthur Rosebrough
is spending next week-end with me.
Yours optimistically,
JOHN LEADER.
- - . . --<£> |
Campus Bulletin |
o-=-o
All freshman girls are invited to
the Wwama tea which will be
given this afternoon at Alumni
hall in the Woman’s building
from 4:00 to 6:00.
Mazamas—All members in Eugene
meet in Room 110 of Adminis
tration Building, next Sunday af
ternoon, Nov. 8th, at 5 p. m.
Graduate Student meeting Tuesday
November 9, at noon at College
Side Inn. Important business to
be discussed.
Intra-Mural Athleties—Monday’s
game. Sigma Nu vs. Kappa Del
ta Phi, 4:15 o’clock. Men’s gym
nasium.
Alpha Phis must have their pic
tures taken today, Saturday, at
Kennel-Ellis studio.
Mu Phi Epsilon meeting Sunday
afternoon at 3:30 in the music
building.
CAMPUS Y. M. AND Y. IN.
WILL BRINE SPEAKERS
Noted Foreign Secretaries
Will Be On Program
A number of speakers will be
brought to the University this year
by the United Christian Work,
with the active co-operation of the
campus T. M. and Y. W. C. A.,
it has been announced, and a tent
ative schedule has been arranged.
This is in accordance with the poli
cy that has been followed by these
organizations for the past several
years.
Hubert C. Herring, of Boston is
the first of the speakers that will
appear on the campus this year, and
he will speak on “The High Price
of Hate,” Tuesday, November, No
vember 24 at Alumni hall.
It is hope dto bring a number of
foreign secretaries to th'e eampus
to visit the different groups of for
eign students, and the first of these
will be Mr. Paul Mung, a highly
educated Chinese, who will come
some time in January, the exact
date being as yet undecided.
Mr. Charles Hurry, one of the
verv strongest of the international
secretaries of the Y. M. C. A., will
also be on the campus some time
in January. He represents the
Friendly Belations committee of
the Association, which looks after
the welfare of the foreign students
who are studying in our Universi
ties.
It is also probable that the Hon
orable J. Still Wilson, former may
or of Berkeley, but now devoting
his entire time to lecturing, will be
here for one assembly and special
meetings in the early part of April.
announcement
Tau Nu announces the pledging of
Roberta Wright of Portland.
lottery
DANCE
Tonite
Laraway Music
Hall
ALWAYS SOMETHING
NEW
More Fun—Let’s Go
Men a Dollar — Ladies Free
Today
Last
Day!
Norman
Kerry
in
“LORRAINE
OF THE
LIONS”
with
PATSY RUTH MILLER
REX COMEDY
INTERNATIONAL NEWS
Continuous 1 to 11:30
REX
THEATRE
RIALTO
Junction City
THEATRE
Sunday
THOMAS
MflGHAN
* Aootn* rv«M «. ttsti u um
With VIRGINIA VALU
Cl Qtmmoum Qictoat
i
Ill
THE MAN
WHORHMDj
HIMSELF"
Hooth Tarkington’s high-tension story of a man who
went to jail for another man’s crime, and of how he
came back and settled old scores.
CARL JAQUET ON THE WURLITZER
Two Shows, 7:15 and 9:15 p. m.
Regular Prices. 10c and 30c
Always in Taste
Ice Cream is always in taste, because
it is the ideal dessert for any occasion,
the one heartily welcomed and by far
the easiest prepared.
BLUE BELL ICE CREAM
—represents the ifce cream of perfec
tion made from pure cream, put up
and sent to you in absolutely sanitary
condition. Start the habit of serving
this healthful dessert by phoning your
order now for your Sunday meal.
Eugene Farmers
Creamery
EE VIEW OUT SOON
The first issue of the Oregon Law
Review, which is edited by Pro
fessor Charles E. Carpenter, of the
University of Oregon law school,
will be out in December.
The first issue of the season will
be devoted to the proceedings of
the state bar association at the an
nual meeting held in September.
Subscribe for the Emerald.
VARSITY
GARBER SHOP
Eleventh and Alder
OUR MOTTO
Quality First j
FOR YOUR CONVENIENCE
The
Lemon 0 Pharmacy
NEXT TO YE CAMPA SHOPPE
Bob Vic
rr
Millinery Sale
A wonderful group of Pattern Felts—Velours and
Sport Hats from which to choose. All at a great
saving—
$5.00 Hats
Entire Line of Hats up to $15..00 at One Price, $5.00
Upstairs Opposite Rex Theatre
' NEW LARA WAY BUILDING
Leone Jenkins
SON of\
ZORRO
Trigger Action
And dirllinj surprise* {whnrt this |r««t
Fairbanks picture. Tks finest adventure talc
ever screened. Tke dashing, daring f>on Q
bars all worn) and you live in tangos and thrills.
Fast as Lightning
Starting—
MONDAY
FOR AH
ENTIRE WEEK ’S
SHOWING
At Popular
Prices •
cDONALD
THEATRE