2 The Newi-Review, Roseburg, Or. Thuri., Dm. 22, 1949
Imaginary Visit To Mars Discloses
Inhabitants Resembling Circus Freaks
By HAL BOYLE
NEW YORK UP) Want to know what
planet Mars?
Well, it's a place where:
The women rule, but husbands sometimes
going on a sex strike.
The Inhabitants live 3,000 to
got her 129th divorce.
The population Is Jlmited to
two billion scientifically bred
Martians, and the ladies must
await their turn to have children.
A famous Martian actress recent
ly gave birth to her first child at
the age of 2,500 years.
Martians live In a vast under
ground city a mile below the cold
surface of the planet. There are
no traffic jams. Travel is by
transparent vehicles that neu
tralize gravitation.
There has been no crime for
950 million years. Water is the
most precious commodity, and
the last criminal was a man who
violated the planet rule against
taking more than one bath in a
month. His punishment: He was
disintegrated.
This picture of life on Mars is
given In a tabloid Christmas
magazine issued every year all
in fun by Dr. Hugo Gernsback,
publisher of science fiction.
life is like on the
win their way by
5,000 years, and one wife Just
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It't On Jackson
What Peoplt Llkt
The 1949 edition, called "Quip,"
chronicles the adventures of a
mythical explorer named Grego
Banshuck, who landed on Mars
last last October in a space ship.
You don't have to believe in
explorer Banshuck any more
than you believe In Santa Clatis,
but it's some world he says he
found on Mars.
The people there are 10 feet
tall. Because of the low gravity
and thin air of thn red planet,
they have big flat webbed feet,
thin and fragile arms and legs,
a barrel chest and a huge head
with a brain 94 times that of a
human being. They communicate
by thought instead of by voice.
Because the air doesn't carry
scent well they have developed a
long nose like the trunk of an
elephant.
Their thoughts are exchanged
by long telepathic antennas,
growing from their heads. A male
has two, a female four.
"The double antennas allow her
to double-talk better," a Martian
quipped to the explorer. "This
confuses the male better too."
Miles Wiri Sex Strike
Sometimes the Martian male
rebels against being lady-bossed.
"The males go on strike en
masse millions of them refuse
to- make love to their wives," re
ported Banshuck.
"The last sex strike" 14 years
ago, involving over 2,500,000
males, lasted five-and-one-half
yars. The males won!"
But Mars is no place for a
bachelor. The girls do the court
ing Ihere what's so different
about that? And the man of her
choice can't refuse her unless he
U already married.
The explorer said the inhabi
tants of the red planet don't like
or trust the human race and re
gard them ax culturally and In
tellectually retarded.
"The earthllngs have the rat's
instincts," one Martian columnist
remarked.
It is doubtful whether the ave
rage man of earth, however,
would want to trade places. Mar-
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CARL J. PEETZ
920 S. Stephens
Phann 271
Cleveland Transit
System Tied By Strike
(Continued From Page One)
town area and Traffic Commis
sioner John R. Sammon esti
mated that 50,000 more automo
biles than usual were on the
streets.
The vote was 496 to 287 against
deferring the walkout until Jan.
16. This meant complying with
a midnight strike deadline.
In making this decision, the
unionists ignored: (1) A plea by
their local president, Thornas R
Meaney, to hold off until the Jan.
16 date; and 2 the Ferguson
act, an Ohio law that provides
heavy penalties for public em
ployes who strike.
"Apparently," said Meaney,
"these men are not disturbed
about that bit of legislation."
Pledge Violation Charged
The strike of the main means
of public transportation in the
nation's sixth largest city with
more than 1,000,000 residents
came as such a surprise that May
or Thomas A. Burke had to be
roused from bed.
Obviously angry, Burke hustled
down to city hall and opened a
meeting with Meaney and Harry
C. Lang, local secretary, he called
the strike a "complete violation"
of a promise by Meaney, Lang
and the union's international rep
resentative, Robert Stack of De
troit. This pledge, he continued, was
that there would be no strike
until they conferred with him
again. Burke also claimed ' that
the union should have received
sanction from its parent group,
the Cleveland federation of labor.
Dispute of Long Standing
The CTS says its 1,600 vehicles
provide more than 1,000,000 rides
dally. The last time Cleveland
had a public transportation strike
was April 29, 1943. That one last
ed 18 hours.
The cause of the strike dates
back to last July when David
Ralph Hertz, umpire for CTS
labor disputes, ruled on vaca
tions. He set forth a formula stating
that vacation pay for hourly paid
operating employes should be
l25th of the number of hours
actually worked In the 50 weeks
preceding vacations.
However, unionists claimed that
In many cases that would be less
than the 96-hour paid vacations
they have been receiving.
CAT CAUSES BLACKOUT
LAS CRUCES, N. M. UP) Las
Cruces homes were blacked out
for 35 minutes by a cat.
The cat crawled on the wirps
atop an electric company substa
tion and absorbed 24,000 volts of
electricity.
Workmen, arriving to repair
the damage, found the cat lying
on the ground. They said it Jump
ed up and ran away minus ail
its hair and one foot.
FUMES FELL FIREMEN
PHILADELPHIA, Dec. 22. OP)
At least 50 firemen were felled
by smoke and acrid fumes today
as they attempted to located a
fire in a compartmented experi
mental building at the Frankford
arsenal. .
An arsenal spokesman said am
munition was stored In the build
ing but declined to say what sort
of experiments were carried on
In the structure.
tians, according lo Banshuck, eat
synthetic food, never sleep, and
are put to death all except the
great leaders at the age of 3,000.
Outstanding Martians are al
lowed to live to 5,000.
One feature of Martian life, on
the other hand, might appeal to
earthly bureaucrats. Banshuck
discovered the planet Is ruled by
a conclave of five women, each of
whom is elected at the age of
2,000 and remains in power unil
death.
This gives her 1,000 years In
public office!
jam ( i i i in i i
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2 LBS.
Umpqua or
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45'
lb. 67c
41c
WALNUTS
BUTTER
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f SCHILLING'S ORANGE PEKOE-LB. 95
DATES New Crop, Pitted pkg.
A DDI EC Washington Delicious. C Grade 9
Art.LpCJ LARGE BOX
Candied
PINEAPPLE lb. 69c
Swantdown
CAKE FLOUR pkg. 37c
HI-H0 CRACKERS .... lb. 29c
TURKEY SPREAD. .4-ox. tin 10c
Fancy 150 Site
ORANGES Vt box 2.49
SQUASH
GRAPEFRUIT, pinks
TANGERINES
BROCCOLI
. .. .lb. 2c
. each 10c
. 2 ibs. 33c
. bunch 19c
Pricai Effective Friday and Saturday
oh franks (Grocery
Cast and Stephens
FREE DELIVERY
Phone 118
Lutheran Church,
Sutherlin, Plans
2 Yule Services
St. John's Lutheran church of
Sutherlin is planning to observe
the Christmas season with two
special services. The principal
Christmas -service will be held
Sunday morning, Dec. 25, at 10:30
at the Legion hall.
Rev. Richard E. Graef, pastor,
will preach the sermon; entitled
"Permanent Values from Christ
mas." St. John's Lutheran Choir
will Join in Pietro Yon's anthem,
"Gesu Bambino," the Infant Je
sus I.
A service featuring many of
the favorite Christmas carols will
be substituted for the usual li
turgical service. Special record
ed Christmas music has -'lso
been scheduled for this service,
notably, "And the glory of the
Lord," "Unto us a Child Is born,"
and the ''Hallelujah" chorus, all
excerpis from Handel's oratorio,
"The Messiah."
The children's Christmas serv
ice is scheduled for Christmas
Eve at 7:30 at the Legion hall.
At this service the children will
conduct the service by present
ing recitations and a brief pag
eant. For a half hour preceding
this service only candles and the
Christmas tree will be lit and the
Christmas portion of Handel's
"Messiah" will be performed by
the Huttersfield Choral society
under the direction of Sir Mal
colm Sargent.
St. John's choir is also plan
ning on Christmas caroling this
Friday night. This will be fol
lowed by a Christmas party at
which Mrs. Arthur Stefferud wi"
be hostess. The choir is undei
the direction of Mrs. Graef. The
committees for decoration of the
hall are headed by Mrs. Walter
Anderson and Keith Dies. The
children's program has been pre
pared by Mrs. Paul 'Urban, Mrs.
Keith Deis, Mary Lynn Dies and
Mrs. Graef. Friends of St. John's
are invited to attend all services,
and children attending the Sat
urday night service will receive
a fruit and candy treat.
M'Arrhur Raps Russians
For Their "Hypocrisy"
(Continued from Page One)
Compromise Offered
In Milk Price Dispute
(Continued From Page One)
letter charging "oppression" by
the Japanese government whlcn
Lt. Gen. Derevyanko, head of the
Soviet mission, addressed to Gen
eral MacArthur.
MacArthur said the letter show
ed "a callousness of hypocrisy I
can not fail to denounce." He
termed it a smokescreen to dis
tract attention from the repat
riation issue.
W. J. Sebald, head of the occu
pation diplomatic section, earlier
had termed the letter "unadul
terated twaddle."
Japanese Placated
The Japanese crowd around the
Soviet mission became clamor
ous at times. Once Russian guards
pushed them back when they at
tempted to enter the compound.
The delegation went to the
embassy to keep what its lead
ers said was an appointment
made last week wilh Soviet of
ficials who promised answers lo
questions on repatriation.
Later, however, eight members
of the delegation were admitted.
They reappeared in about 30 min
utes and said they had been told
to return again on Dec. 28 by
an unidentified Soviet official.
Sebald told the council yester
day, after the Russian walkout,
that probably 374,041 of the miss
ing Japanese prisoners had died
in Soviet prison camps. He read
a lengthy account of the Rus
sians treating prisoners brutally
in "disregard for humanity."
MaeArthur't Comment Bitter
Of this MacArthur said today:
"I can well understand the re
luctance of the Soviet member
yesterday to listen to so grue
some arid savage a story In all
Its harrowing barbarity. It could
well chill and sicken even a
hardened old soldier."
MacArthur's statement said In
part:
"The Soviet member to the
council has now given to the
press a letter containing charges
of oppression by the Japanese
government. These moth eaten
charges have been so often made
by the Soviets and so often irre
futably shown to be completely
prejudiced, if not actually false.
That their continued repetition
could well be ignored under
normal circumstances as .merely
blatant propaganda. But when,
as at this moment, they are again
taken from the shelf and freshly
dusted off to act as a smoke
screen to distract attention from
the Investigation of the dreadful
ing, but merely an attempt to
reach an understanding.
He said the purpose of the
hoard was to stabilize the market.
The board cannot guarantee any
one a profit in the milk busi
ness, he said. While realizing that
prices for farm products are now
down, while feed and production
costs are up, the condition is
seasonal, he explained.
If the producers cannot pro
duce at the present price, and
think the consumer price must
be raised, it is up to them to
take the responsibility of telling
the public of the raise, he said.
State milk control board offi
cials met this morning with milk
distributors and producers in the
Douglas county courthouse in an
effort to settle a three-day dis
pute over prices.
Ormond J. Feldkamp, co-owner
of Umpqua dairy, one of three
principal Douglas county dairies
involved, denied that Roseburg's
milk supply was "cut off."
"Our normal supply of milk is
cut off," he agreed, "hut we are
still receiving milk for Thursday
delivery."
He expressed hope (hat addi
tional milk supplies would be ob
tained from dairymen who do not
normally market their milk here.
The dispute began Tuesday
when producers arrived at local
distributing plants, asking for a
ten cent increase in prices paid
for butterfat and raw milk. Pro
ducers claim they are operating
in a "high cost area," thus mak
ing the price increase a neces
sity. They also charge the three
principal inland county distribu
tors UmDOUa. Mvrtle Creek and
Roseburg dairies with keeping
the price of milk to consumers at
the same level, while cutting the
price to producers, in line with
the reduced minimum prices set
seven weeks, ago by the milk con
trol board.
Carl B. Binder of Elklon, presi
dent of the Umpqua Valley Milk
Producers association, said milk
is still being offered to county
creameries but wilh "an increas
ed price tag" on It. Until their
price demands are met. Binder
said, producers are sending
grade A milk to a Grants Pass
cheese-making concern. However,
the association has agreed to of
fer 400 gallons of milk at the
present price for delivery to local
schools and hospitals.
Distributors say they will not
Increase the price to producers,
but will stick to the minimum set
by the state control board. The
present price is 90 cents and $1.90
for butterfat and milk.
AUTO BLOW FATAL
SEATTLE, Dec. 22 P-Knut
Telleffson, 62, president of the
Chalham Strait Fish company in
southeastern Alaska, was fatallv
injured by an automobile here
last night.
We died two hours after beinp
struck down. The driver of the
car was booked at the city jail
on a negligent driving charge.
fate of hundreds of thousands
of Japanese prisoners probably
dead on Soviet soil, they repre
sent a callousness of hypocrisy I
can not fall to denounce."
New York City
Water Shortage
Growing Worse
NEW YORK. Dec. 22 . (JP)
New York's droueht-rldden res
ervoir continued to drop today
as state and city officials pre
pared for a debate on who's to
blame for the water shortage.
Water In the reservoirs went
down 242.000.000 eallons in the
last 24 hours to a level of 87,245,
000,000 gallons, 34.5 percent of
capacity.
On this dale last vear. which
Itself was below normal, there
were 125.201.000,000 gallons in the
reservoirs, 4.a percent of capacity-
Gov. Thomas E. Dewey and
city officials were to ateue at an
afternoon session about where
the responsibility for the situa
tion lies and aiso what can be
done about it.
Meanwhile, a conservation au
thority reported that New York's
troubles were only a counterpart
of those facing many other sec
tions oi me nation.
Leslie A. Miller, former Wy
oming governor and recent chair
man ot the national resources
task force for the Hoover com
mission, wrote in the 1950 Book
of Knowledge annual that the
country should take a complete
stock of its water suddIv.
Several areas are using more
water than their natural water
sheds can ever replenish, he said.
Miller cited California, Illinois,
Ohio, Pennsylvania. Texas and
Arizona as states in which water
shortages are looming.
There is one estimate that use
of ground water nearly doubled
in the nation between 1935 and
1945, he wrote.
Dewey charges present and
past city administrations both
Democratic and Fusion with ne
glect of the water problem for
many years.
C. A. Ricketts Resigns As
Director Of School Band
(Continued from Page One)
band during appearances of the
last two years. Fame of the high
school's fast-slepping marching
band spread to California this
year, resulting in an invitation
to become one of the few high
school bands in the nation asked
to participate in Pasadena's
Tournament of Roses. This invi
tation was declined because of
lack of funds. Also inaugurated
during Ricketts' leadership was
the Roseburg Band Parents as
sociation. Another Change Announced
Elliott also announced the ap
pointment of Leonard Kimbrell
to succeed Mrs. Louise Helleek,
who is resigning for reasons of
health.
Mrs. He! leek's classes will he
assumed until Jan. 23 by Kim
brell and Miss Marie DiLoreto,
hired at. the beginning of the
school year. After that dale, new
teaching assignments lor the new
school term will be announced
by the school board.
Kimbrpll returns to the Rose
burg high school faculty follow
ing an absence of two years while
studying at the University of Ore-
Army Forced To Halt Pay
For Enlistees' Drills
WASHINGTON, Dec. 22
The army is cutting off all drill
pav for 78,464 enlisted men and
officers in 2,866 of its reserve
training units.
The order goes Into effect Jan.
1 for at least six months.
Armv officials disclosed the ac
tion today. They said a tremen
dous jump In the number enter
ing the paid drill program has
left the army without enough
money to continue the payments.
The order affects 57,705 officers
and 20,759 enlisted men. They are
in units which would he used as
"fillers" In army groups In event
of mobilization.
The reservists can continue
drilling, hut without pay, the of
ficials said.
The Weather
U. S. Weather Bureau Office
Roseburg, Oregon
Pertly cloudy today, tonight,
and Friday.
Higheit temp, for any Dee. 70
Lowest temp, for any Dec .. -S
Higheit temp, yesterday
Lowest temp, last 24 hrt it
Precipitation last 24 hre 3
Precipitation from Oec. 1 2.96
Precipitation from Sept. t 10.60
Deficiency from Oee. X 43
CRASH KILLS MOTORIST
PORTLAND, Dec. 22. UP)
Charles L. Wetzell, 62, Boring,
was killed today when his car
spun from the road Into a power
pole on north Columbia boulevard
here.
His son, Charles H. Wetzell,
26, was treated for shock.
gon for his master's degree in
art and English. He taught here
from 1946-48 and instituted tne
art courses now offered at the
senior high school. He is a grad
uate of State Teachers college
at Natchitoches, La., and of the
University of Oregon.
We Made It!
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Post-Holiday
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We will make your family
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Owner: Charles Gring
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1 Roseburg
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Best wishes for a
M 9 lffeSS9 MerrY Christmas
ftrSttk wVs New Year
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