OUT OF TI1K GIXOER JAB . , "Wheather" may Justl be termed a bad spell of weather. A nan Is In no condition to settle down until he has settled up. Most schoolboys would rather eat a "njece" than speak one. Tho potntoe bug Is bad enough bill tho evorpresent humbug Is worse. ' Tho nightmare waits for those who Indulge In too much Christmas cheer. Why is Johnny like a side-tracked freight car? Because, he has been switched. To be successful both the baseball pitcher and the orator must have a good dolivery. What corn heard with Its ears and the potatoe saw with Irs eyes, none will over know. H may be pleasant to sit In the lap of luxury, but consider how It hurts (o be tumbled out. In a baseball game a pitcher may band ail the curves and still be play ing a straight game. Many a man who Is down on his "luck?, mlfcht easily reach prosperity by prefacing his luck with a "P." J. Jr. Hill, the railroad magnate, must be a first class driver since he can handle several lines at once. If we were silent with respect to our achievements as we are to our mistakes, what a silent world this would be. Perhaps Fletcher got his Idea or tho hcalthfulness of thought chewing from the cow. She stands at the head of that lino. - - 'when the preacher said, "Behold the perfect mail!" ovcrv male mem ber of the congregation became cross eyed with looking nt himself. GliKNDAI.K HAl'F.MNGS F. C. Ladd has on fcaifil a fine lot of holiday groceries. A choice lot of cranberries, mince meat, npples and pumpkins, all of which he will sell at very .rensonnblo prices. R. T. McNicols, of Oakley farm, who Is one of the most popular min ing men on the coast has Rone to Gal Ice Creek where he has been rtffered a fine position as superintendent of tiinse mines. Horn. In this city, Pecemlier 6, 1909, to Mr. and Mrs. Mauley Mc Knlght, a son. Mother and baliv arc getting along nicely, and, well the father may recor. Mr. and Mrs. Al Collins wero In the city today.. They report a deep snow In their section. The heaviest snow that has fallen In this valley for nineteen y?ars now covers the ground, and the oldest inhabitant never knew the snow storms to commence so early In the season. Dr. A. F. Sethcr, of tho popular medical firm of I)rs. Scely, Setter & Stoward, of Roschurg, spent Saturday ut Glendalo. He was accompanied by his wife, and they were the guests of Mr. and Mrs. B. L. Darby. G. Leroy Hall will give one of his famous lecture rocitals entitled, "An Evening With Rlloy," under the ex cellent management of the Round Table Club. It will take the place of the Club's regular programme. It will be held at Olivet Presbyter'nn church. C. T. Xall placed at Irfsh and Tliig ley's grocery store some greer, peas gathered from his garden yesterday. - Glendale News. There nro a number of admirers of Judge Nnll, In this city and valley, who really would enjoy seeing him out picking peas in a foot of Die beautiful snow. Of course no one doubts the unquestioned veracity of tho News. Our News In last Issue objects to tho S. P. Englneem awakening 'the echoes In the btlll night by whistling their signals as they arrive and dopart fom our city. The brave engineer who Is such a factor in the progres- Mvoness of civilization, with his care ful fireman and brakemen, takes his life in his hands us he sits at the throttle and watches over his train .fust imagine his respnnribiilty, and always he has the just nance of the wheel between himself and his .loom. Engineers, Brakemen and Conductors are brave and faithful tn their trust and when accident happens to their trains and hcy look upon some one who has been hurt or may be killed, they Hhed bitter tears of ten-flc- byhipathy, and are always ready to respond to any call for help. They ough to have tho best of the bakery products, and In fact we cant Imagine too good for them. Brave engineers whistle on, and In Glendalo there Is one who If awakened from sl-.iniber will breathe a prayer that you may take your train with Its precfous bur den of human lives safely to Its des tination. By the way, we don't think ijioy mean to disturb our slumbers nerhaps they are Just taking notice of the vile odcrs that make the air blue near our depot. It Is surely enough to stop any train that comes to our city. So while we are passing ordinances against the music of the engine whistle let us pass an ordin ance for nn Improved sanitary sewer age near our depot, and may be we won't be distrubed by such .Bniull matters as a whistle. Mrs. F. Hilmnn, after, visiting friends at Canyonville and Riddle re turned to the city yesterday. William Fltzpati-lck, of M.wtle Creek, Is visiting his mother, Mrs. Gmma Dohl. In this city. Miss Mae Bailey Is clerking at the Glendalo Pharmacy. Mr. and Mrs. Fred Newel nee Miss Ooldio Clemens, nre now at Elreno, Oklahoma, visiting at the home of Mr. Newell s parents. They lert Glen Jule about a month ago, and expect to locale In Oklahomn. Mr. and Mrs. Newell have a host of friends in this city who wish for them piosperity in their new home. Mrs. Newell Is the only child of Mr. ands Airs. ' Juries Clemens in this city. AGRICriTUItAIi COM.KGK Winter Courses January 4th to Feb- I'lllliv IHtll 1!)()0. Practical work, lectures nad dem onstrations will be given in such vital subjects' as General Farming, Fruit Culture, Animal Husbandry, Dairy ing. Poultry Keeping, the Business side of Farming, Forestry, Capentry, Blaeksmillilng, Mechanical Drawing, Cooking, Sewing, Dressmaking, Home Management, etc All regular courses begin January 4th and end February 11th'. Farmers' Week February 14th to ISth A cordial invitation extended to all Interested. Good accommodations mny be se cured at reasonable rates. No age limit above 1 6 years. No entrance re quirements. Prominent lecturercs to he secured for specinl topics. The in structional force of the Colege num bers 100. Excellent equipment. A special feature Is the Farmers Week which come this year Februnry R oseb u rg Restaurant South Side Cass St., Near Depot. STAPLETON & PATTEKSON, Propf. OPEN AT ALL HOURS leading and best restaurant in the city. None but white people employed Nothing but the best in the market served. Give ns a trial And be con vinced. 14th to 18lh. Lectures, discussions, and u general reunion. For fml her Information address Registrar, Oregon Agricultural Col lege, Corvnllls, Oregon. d-lS-p If you are looking for good service In tho barber line call at .the Maddlx barber -shop, Cass treet, Roseburg National Bank BldK. Three chair shop. Bath rooms In connection, tf. Office: Warehouse No. 8 Near the Depot. Telephone Main a3i or 311. GROUCH it ALDRIGH Wholesale and Retail Dealers in Cemen Plaster, Lime and Cement Blocks, Cemen Sewer Pipe, Mill Work and all Building Materia Give us a call. We will save you money. Closing Out Sale of All millinery at cost and below until closed out We need the room and tlou't wsnt to carry anything over to next seasen. Our aim is to give you new and up-to-date itooils. We d not want to have any old initerial on band to work over, we mean eueineBs vome in sua let ne Btipply your needs 1 The Fair We're in a Position to offer you the best the market af fords In the way of Meats; and our prices you know are always lowest. We handle only prime stock. Qual ity and quantity guaranteed. Fine roasting pieces of beef from 8e to IS He pound. First class mutton, veal, pork and poultry equally low. Can't do better anywhere. Phone us your order. We deliver to any part of the city. Cass Street MarKet LOUIS KOHLHAGEN, Prop. 107 West Cass St. Phone 111. iH' ' ' Free Delivery. it LEONA MILLS LUMBERCOMPANY Lumber, Lath, Shingles and Dry Finish Luiur erj . Doors and Windows of all Kinds. X Yrds on Lower Oak Street, tl. 'Phone 1411 ROSEBURG,. OREGON ' D. H MARSTERS PLUMBING SHOP. Plumbing, Sheet Metal WorK, Tinning and Heating North JacKson Street, adjoining Peoples Marble WorKs. Telephone 2511. WorK Done on Short Notice ROSEBURG. ORE.