THE DALLES WEEKLY CHRONICLE, WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 24, 1894.
HONORARY DLGKEES.
TImii fflw They Wrr ltrclowwl Vpoa
I'nwllllnic Subject.
It is to ho upivs,'il, -in the judg
ment f charity, " ut lcut. that col
lejfo decrees urv never conferred in
those day.- except lis they uro deserved.
Thislia.s n.it always Wen true, how
ever, niul jiartly fer tliis renson. irtly,
perhupo. out of a fcclin;,' of uiiHlesty,
kouio men luive slimmed honorary
titles nlinivst as earnestly as others
have coveted them. l-peakinc about
this Mii'ieet. the lUwton Watchman
says:
judye IV tors is authority for the
statement that after I.a Fayette hail
been made a doctor of laws ly one of
oureolU s. liarou Mu'ocii was injrroat
fear h st he-hould im-cl with a similar
mishap. Ka iivr to pa tiir.nii.'h u eol
lepe town where the marquis hal been
thus ilisthv'uisheil. the old warrior
halted his men ami thus r.ihiressoil
them:
"You shall spur do horse veil, and
ride troo do town like do mischief,
for. if doy catch you, dey make one
doctor of you."
The touirh old soldier had no more
respect for such a distinction than hi.s
countryman, liaudcl. who refused to
accept the decree of doctor of music
from On ford.
'Vat. frow my money away for dat
de blockhead's vish' I no vant to be
von divtor."
Then- is a story that not lonjr apo.
when college deprives wore scattered
Komewhat lavishly, at: illiteruto rich
man. havin? lieen honored with a de
pTee by a collcpv which tie had laid un
der obligation, made a wajrer that he
could obtain a similar honor for his
servant.
He won the wapvr. and. encouraped
by his success, made another that he
could obtain a doirree for his horsv.
This time, however, he loe.t. The col
lope authorities pot wind of his pa mo.
and, in answer to his letter requesting
a doctorate for so and so. the president
wrote a courteous note, sayinp that
thouph the trustees were very anxious
to oblipe so piHHl a friend of the col
lope, they had found on examination
of the records that thouph they had
once conferred a dopree ujion n jackass
there was no precedent for conferring
one upon a horse.
A RABBIT MINER.
The Little Animal an Indian to a
Fortune tu Silver.
The famous silver mines of l'otosi.
in South America, were discovered by
an Indian who was in pursuit of an
antelope. lie was climbir.p the stet :
hlope of a hill and seized a lu:.h to help
himself up. Tlic ii'.r:r.t pave way and
he started to fall i :ici:ward, but by a
desperate effort avcd himself, and.
fallinp forward, cut his mse apainst u
projeetinp lcilpe of stone, tays the .Now
Vork Journal.
Stoppinp to stanch the flow of blood,
he chanced to look at the stone which
had done the damape. when, to his as
tonishment, ho perceived it was almost
pure silver.
This story may be apochrvphal. but
a tale wnicn comes from Mexico is
tolerably well authenticated. Ac
cording to this narrative, one of the
richest mines in that land of mineral
wealth was found by a rabbit. An
Indian was hunting rabbits and his
dop chased one to a hole in a hillside.
The Indian hesitated for a moment
whether to dip out the rabbit he had
seen enter or po in pursuit of another.
Determining finally that one rabbit in
a hole was worth more than half a
dozen on a rocky hillside, he pot a
spade and went to work.
Before he had turned over half a
dozen spadefuls of earth he had for
potten all about the rabbit, for he
made the thrillinp discover- that he
was handlinp almost solid silver. The
man dropped his spade and ran to his
employer with the intellipenee. the
latter retuminp with him to the spot
to see for himself and verify the dis
covery. The rabbit escaped; at least it
is supposed it did. for it enters no
more into the story, but its memory is
preserved in the name of the mine,
which, beinp translated into English,
aipnities the "Iiabbifs Den.-'
It would have been well for the
Indian if he had escaped when the
rabbit did. for. accordinp to the story,
the poor fellow was murdered by the
Spaniard, who desired to keep the
secret of the mine and was afraid that
the Indian mipht reveal it and the pov
ernment mipht step in and claim either
the whole or a larpe part of the pro
ceeds. Coal-lat Kx plosions.
The mininp of coal is attended with
many dangers, but none more to be
dreaded than the dust explosions that
are liable to occur at any instant and
apainst which, in many instances, not
even the most ordinary precautions are
taken. The air becomes thick with
dust, which by some means comes in
contact with flame, and the fire, spread
ing with inconceivable rapidity, causes
the most terrific explosions. It is
claimed that all danger in this direc
tion may be removed by a carefully
arranped system of spraying water
throuph all the passageways. The
wet particles at once fall to the
pround and may be washed away by
fallinp water or trodden down by the
feet of the miners. Recent investiga
tion seems to prove that pas alone pro
ducer comparatively few of the more
dreadful accidents, but that pas anil
coal .dust minpled make an explosive
compound that is preatly to be dreaded.
On Board of a lonliy.
A man-of-war was lyinp off (iibraltar.
and permission wan piven the men to
po ashore for the day. The sailors
amused themselves in various ways
amonp others by ridinp on donkeys,
and their want of experience in this
line caused much merriment. An of
ficer, observing one of the men sitting
far back on the animal, insteail of the
nsnal position, called out: "I fcay.daok.
pet tip more amidships!" With an in
jured air. the sailor replied: "Well. sir.
this is the iirst craft that I ever com
manded in my life, and it's hard, in
deed, if I can't ride on the quarter-deck
if I like."
CHINtSfc WAnrtlORS.
l'rsrtlrliia; with Hows and Arrows- llouiu
Shells tilled with Mud.
Uov. W. E. Crocker, who went from
Louisville us a Chinese missionary,
writes of the war in China us follows,
says the Louisville Courier-Journal:
Just outside the city of Chinp Chow
l u is a garrison of Tartar soldiers. As
I walked on the wall one day 1 saw
some bows and urrows! Just think.
Knvs ami arrows in this day of repent
ing ritles ami Krupp puns!
'The povcrnment of China is not
Chines,-, but Tartar. Over three hun
dred years apo a Chinaman by the
name of Li drove the last emperor of
the Ming dynasty from his throne in
IVUin. This emperor was sent In-yond
the great Chinese wall to the nation of
tierce Tartars, who lived in tents and
engaged in much war. The Tartar
king came down und drove out Mr. Li,
and instead of reinstating the rightful
emperor, took the throne himself. He
ordered the Chinese men to shave the
front part of their heads ami plait their
hair into iwcue, and the women to un
bind theirs. The men id wed, the
women did not. The Tartar women do
not bind their feet, und the court
ladies and most of the soldiers' wives
are Tartars. So really China is a sub
ject nation to an outside power. There
is very little connection -between the
government and the people. The pres
ent emperor has just recently come of
age and some think that he will lo fa
vorable to many reforms in China. He
is studying Knplish. and has inter
course with the representatives from
foreign governments. China has no
conscience, and until the name of Jesus
shall teach them to have a conscience
no kind of reform or advance in science
can help them. They have line silver
mines, tine pold mines, tine old wells,
tine resources as yet untouched, and it
is impossible to utilize them until
China can depend on u Chinaman to do
his duty conscientiously.
"Dr. Crawford was telling how. in the
war with Franco several years ago. a
shell was shot from a Chinese pun into
a French ship, and they expected an
explosion which would seriously in
jure the vessel. It did not explode.
They got skilled men to extract the
dangerous shell from the tiniliers of
the ship. and. after much care, the
shell was taken out and carefully
opened, to be found tilled with mud!
The wily Chinamen, having no con
science, extracted the powder, sold it
and put in the mud."
VILLAGE LIFE IN MEXICO.
A Humdrum ExUieuce with Hat Few At
tract lou.
A glance about the streets reveals a
great monotony of color and outline,
writes T. J. Hughes, in the Chautau
quun. Unbroken lines of one story
houses form narrow, dirty, gutterlike
streets. The yards aud gardens which
make, with their semitropical trees
and plants, delightful interior courts,
whose abundant foliage hides the
houses of the village at a distant view,
are now themselves concealed, and
everything looks barren and desolate.
The only relief is the plaza w ith the
cool and delightful shade of thickly
planted orange, banana and palm trees.
The ancient appearance of houses
and streets is more 'ike what one
would expect to find in Jerusalem than
in a nineteenth century republic.
Oriental features ure everywhere com
mon women carrying immense water
jars, passing to and fro: sleepy-eyed,
lazy donkeys loaded with cane until
nothing but their ears are in sight,
prodded along by the sharp-pointed
sticks of merciless master.-: dirty,
ragged and often naked children wal
lowing in the dust; and great-wheeled,
ancient-looking ox-carts. v it Ti immense
loads, women, burros, children, carts,
straggling along in the middle of the
street. The muddy waters of the llio
Orande separates us from a leople
more different from ourselves than
many across the waters.
Life among the young folks is of but
few attractions to one who has experi
enced its enjoyments in the United
States. JU innocent amusements prac
ticed by us are unknown. There are
no parties, no reading circles, no putc
lic gatherings of young people. No
means are employed to bring the sexes
together to enjoy each other's society,
the young man not even Ixdng per
mitted to visit his sweetheart at her
home.
Whern ln IonkUiK-,l:ie. (io?
What become of the looking glasses?
The annual manufactures in Lurope at
the present time is about eighteen
hundred and fifty sfjuare yards of looking-glass.
Can it be that to their de
struction much of the ill-luck of the
race is due? Glass mirrors are sup
posed to have been first used in Siilon.
and were very expensive for a long
time after their introduction. A letter
written in 1073 says that even if mir
rors hail lieen manufactured in France
at that time only the king would have
been rich enough to have one. In
ancient times polished rnetals were
used, and grand ladies gave their mir
rors in charge of slaves to be kept
bright enough to faithfully reproduce
the charms of their owners.
Her Fare Her fortune.
Queen Victoria's newest maid of '
honor, Miss Majemlie. owes her en- '
trance to royal favor to a curious bit of I
chance. She happened to be singing j
in a church choir one day when tht I
queen was present at Divine services I
and her majesty was o greatly pleased
with the fresh sweetness of the girl's
face and voice that she invited her to !
fill the place coveted by the young girls i
of the English aristocracy. The offer
was the last thing' Mis Majendie her
elf expected.
Literal Snakes In the Wine.
Snakes and lizards hare hitherto'
been generally regarded as the effect!
rather than the cause of stimulants. I
According, however, to the oflicial re-1
port drawn up by the Itritish consul at 1
Pakhoi and submitted to the English
parliament, an immense quantity of
dried lizards have, during the last tvio'
years. leen shipped from that Chinese '
port for use in the adulteration of
wius in Europe and America.
Mexican
Mustang
Liniment
for
Burns,
Caked & Inflamed Udders.
Piles,
Rheumatic Pains,
Bruises and Strains,
Running Sores,
Inflammations,
Stiff joints,
Harness & Saddle Sores,
Sciatica,
Lumbago,
Scalds,
Blisters,
Insect Bites,
All Cattle Ailments,
All Horse Ailments,
All Sheep Ailments,
Penetrates Muscle,
Membrane and Tissue
Quickly to the Very
Seat of Pain and
Ousts it in a Jiffy.
Rub in Vigorously.
Mustang Liniment conquers
Pain,
Makes Han or Beast well
again.
" First young wife Don't you pet ner
ous when your husband doesn't come
home till late? Second young wife Oh,
no: lie's insured heavily in two compa
nies, vou know, dear. Half Ilulidav,
Chully Ethel Knox told me last night
I wasn't over half willed. Susie I
shouldn't fee! badly about that ; she nev
er diil know anything alxiut fractions.
Kite Field' Washington.
"That was a finished nerniou," re
marked a lady a she came out of church
yesterday. "Yes, but I wa afraid it
never would be," said her husband.
Philadelphia Record.
I'rfderewski isn't coming over here
tin year, but the college, football young
man with J'adereweski hair is already
beginning to be very innch in evidence.
Boston (ilobe.
Scientist (at railroad restaurant) Do
vou know, sir, that rapid eating is glow
Miicide? Drummer ItiiiHvle; but on
this road slow eating is starvation. New
York V.'eeklv.
Kckilein Do you take much imlerest
in dose racing matters? Khein-tein
Dree per-cend a mont' from ler fellus
rnit de "sure tings." The I.oser.
"Can't they find old Iiriiikcrofr
will?" "No; his wife put it in the
pocket of one of her dresses before she
died." Ilrooklvn Life.
Haekln'i Arinra nalv.
The best alve in the worid foi cuts,
bruises, sores, ulcers, salt rheum, fevei
sores, tetter, chapped hands, chilblains,
corns, and all skin eruptions, and posi
tively cures piles, or no pay required
I; is guaranteed to give ,erfect satisfac
(on. or money retunued. Price 2 cent
ler l-ox. For saie ry Snipe it Kin
riv Dramatist This joke is meant to hit
the big theater hat. Player It will fro
over the heads- of the audience. Detroit
Tribune.
for Infanta and Children.
Ctorla promote. Dltroetlon, and
overcomes Flatulency, Const! imtion, Bour
Rtomach, Dlarrhipo, and Feverish new
Thus the child is rendered healthy and its
aieep navittrsii. vaarwrisk conmiiia no j
Morphine or other narcotic property.
"Caatoria, Is so well adapted to ehfldren that
I recommend it as superior Unr pmerTtption
known to me." H. A. Aacrnit. M. !.,
Ill South Oxford bt., Drooklyn, N. T.
M For several jeers I have rerommeifiled your
Cantoris,' and ahall aJwava conumie to do so,
a it bsa invariably produced beoenclaJ results.'
tnwm t . i'ARDsr, M. Ii ,
laih Street sad 7th Are., hew York City.
"The use of 'Castor la' Is so universal and
Its merits so well known that It seem a work of
siipererovatlon to eodorae It. ew are Uie In.
telJiErv-nt families who do not keep Caatona
wilitukeaay reach."
Caaixm Ka rtts, P. fX,
hew York City.
The CorrAoa Oobpaxt, 77 Murray street, K. T.
rami
"Tie Regulator Line"
Tie Dalles, Portland and Gloria
Navigation Co
THROUGH
Freigm ana Psssenger Line
Through Iaily Trips Sunday ex
cepted) Wtween'The Pulles and l'ort
land. Steamer Kegulator leaves The
Dili lee at 7 a. in., connecting at the Cas
cade ljocks with Steamer Dulles City.
Steamer Dulles City leaves rortlund
(Yamhill ut. dock) at ti a. m., connect
ing with Steamer llegulator (or The
Dalles.
t'AMSK.NI.klt ItATKM.
One way .
Round trip.
'2.00
3.00
Freight Rates Greatly Reduced)
All freight, cxctt ear lots,
will be brought through, with
out delay at Cascades.
Shipments fur Portland received at
any time day or night. Shipment (or
way landings must ! delivered before
ft p. in. Live stock shipments solicted.
Call on or add rem,
W. C. ALLAWAY,
4iiral A cent
THE-DALLES.
OREGON
J F. FORD, Evangelist,
01 le.t Mntnet, Iowa, write umler )Hte !
March 1, IsW:
8. U. Mkm. SIku. Co.,
Dufur, Oregon.
Gentlemen :
On arriving home last week, 1 found
all y.'ll and anxiously awaiting. Our
little girl, eight and one-half years old,
who had wasted away to M pounds, is
now well, strong and vigorous, and well
fleshed up. S. li. Cough Cure has done
it work well, lioth of the children like
it. Your K. 15. Cough Cure has cured
and kept away all hoarseness from me.
So give it to every one, with greeting
for all. Wishing you proerity, we are
Y'ours, Mk. & Mua. J. F. Fohd.
If rem wiih to feel fresh ami cheerful, aiul reail
for the Spiinjr'a work, clcanw? your ivatem with
the Headacho anil Liver ( urc, by Utli twooi
three dotea each week.
8oId uuder a poaltlre guarantee.
SO ecnta per bottle br all drusgUU.
DOORS,
WINDOWS,
SHINGLES,
FIRE BRICK,
FIRE CLAY,
LIME and
CEMENT,
Window-Glass
and
Picture Moulding.
J. t). SCHRSOa.
frealdeiit.
J. M. Patthmok,
Caahler.
first Rational Bank.
THE DALLES,
OREGON
A General bunking business transacted
Deposit received, subject to Sight
Draft or Check.
Collection made and proi-eed promptly
rem it toil on day of collection.
Sight and Telegraphic Exchange sold on
New York, San Francisco and Port
land. UIHKCTUKS
I). T. Thompson. Jno. S. Slhknck,
El. M. WlLLIAMA, iEO. A. LlKHC.
H. M. Ukam,.
Undertakias Establishmen
t
m.
PJtINZ & NITSCIIKK
-UEAI.EK IN-
Furniture and Carpets.
We have added to our business a
complete Undertaking Establishment,
and as wo are in no way connected with
the Undertakers' TriMt, our prices wil
lie low accordingly.
flew York Weekly Tribune
4tONIY
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HAD AT THE
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- The Dalles, Oregor