THE DALLES WEEKLY CHRONICLE, FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 12, 1892.
DID YOU KNOW IT
WE ARE AGENTS FOR THE
n i ii j mi x mi mv .iiiii n.imii-v i.iiiiiiii -Miivr sinn
.flUllU JIU IV I-""- UU.HVJ, UU.11U1AVA i" i vu
Ranges, 'Jemell's Stoves and flanges, Universal Stoves and flanges.
We are also agents fop the Celebrated Boynton fomaee.
Ammunition and Loaded Shells, Ete.
SANITARY PliUmBlNG A SPECIAiiTY;
MAIER & BENT.ON
BOX 105.
SITUATED AT THE
Destined to be the Best
Manufacturing Center in
the Inland Empire.
jlorth Dallss,
For Further Information Call at. the Office of
Interstate Investment Co.;
O. D. TAYLOR- THE DALLES.
JOLES BROS.,
" - : DEALERS IN :
Staple ag Fancy finies
Hay, Grain and Feed.
Masonic Block, Corner Third and
DRUGS
2
Snipes & Kinersly,
-THE LEADING
III
slfi awl
URB
Handled by Three
ALSO ALL
Patent ffledieines and Druggists Sundries,
HOUSE PAINTS, OILS AND GLASS.
Agents for Murphy's Fine Varnishes and theonly agents in
the City for The Sherwin, Williams Cos Paints.
-WE
, v ...
The Largest Dealers in Wall Paper.
Finest Line of Imported Key West and Domestic Cigars.
, ' Agent for Tansill's Punch.
129 Second Street, ' Th e Dal Pes, Oregon
Young & Kuss,
General Blacksmithing and Work done
promptly, and all work
Guaranteed.
flopse Shoeing a Speciality.
TIM Street, opposite tlie old Lielie Stand.
THE PACIFIC CORSET COMPANY,
-MANUFACTURERS OF-
HAND-CORDED HEALTH CORSETS,
Todies' Dress Reform Waits, Misses' and Children's
Waists, Skirt and Hose Supporters, etc. Agents
wanted at once to canvas for our goods in every
town and city west -of the Rockies.
We are also Agents for the Standard Seating Machine.
Write at once for terms to agents
THE PACIFIC CORSET CO.,
CRHND DHLLES,
THE DALLES, - - OREGON.
HEAD OF NAVIGATION.
Best Selling Property of
the Season in the North
west. 72 WASHINGTON ST. PORTLAND.
Court Streets, The Dal!es,Oregon.
Pidml Dnil
Registered Druggists.
THE LEADING
ARE-
Successors to C. E. Dunham.
Druggists and-Giemists.
Pirc Eiis ani Meiicines.
Dispensing Physicians' PreayiptioDS a Speeialty.
Night Druggists always in Attendance.
. THE DALLES, - : OKEGON.
Byrne.Fiona&Co..
The freezing nights and thawing days
are liable to cause serious injury to fall
grain. The present weather is similar
to that of February, 18S3, when almost
the entire fall and winter wheat of the
Willamette valley was. frozen out:" The
damage now would be light compared
with tbat of 1883'as little fall wheat was
own, the fall rains preventing it. Eu
gene Guard. .
N
STIPATION.
Afflict half the American people yet there l
only one preparation of Sarsaparilla that acta on
the bowels and reaches this important trouble,
and that is Joy's Vegetable Sarsaparilla. -4t re
lieves it in 24 hours, and an occasional dose
preTentiTettirn. "Ve refer by permission to C. E.
Elkington, 125 Locust Avenue, Ban Francisco;
J. H. Brown, Petaluma; H. S. Winn, Geary Court,
Ban Francisco, and hundreds of others who have
used it in constipation. One letter is a sample of
hundreds. Ellington, writes: "I bare been for
years subject to bilious headaches and constipa
tion. Have been to bad for a year back have
had to take a physic every other night or else I
would have a headache. After taking one bottle
f J. V. 8. , i am in splendid shape. It has done
wonderful things tor me. People similarly
troubled should try ii and be convinced."
Joy's
Vegetable
drsaparilla
Host modem, mt viVc tiv. largest bottle,
sane price, f l.ft. si i for j.'lOO.
For Sale by SNIPES & K1NERSLY
THE DALLES, OREGON.
I'KOFESSIOXAI, CARDS.
WMe
J. ROBERTS Civil Esgineer ien-
erl emrineerinz practice. Surveying nd
mftp)iiip; estimates and plans for irrigation,
evergc, water-works, railroads, bridges, etc.
Address: P. O. Box 107, The Dalle?, Or.
M. SAUNDERS Architect. Plans and
specifications furnished for dwellings.
churches, business blocks, schools and factories.
Charge modernte, satisfaction guuranteed. Of
dce over French's bnnk. The Dnlles, ureeon.
I. .SCTHER1.AXD-Fei.low of Trinity
J Medical College,
and member of the Col -
we of i'hyieiann and Surgeons, Ontario, Phy-
..ciun ni .-surgeon, uince; rooms a ana tnap-jit-n
bluck. Residence: Judge Thornbury's ee
ml street. Ollice hours; 10 to 12 a. in., 2 to A
md 7 to 8 p. in.
I K
O. D. PDA N E PHYSICIAN AND Sl'B-
i.eon. Onie: rooms 5 and 6 Chapman
31M'k. Kosidence No.
r ourin
street, one
Hook south of oi:it House.
Ollice hours H to 12
A. !.. to-S and 7 to i . M
4 . Bfc.SXETT, ATTORNEY-AT-LAW. Of-
im tin in hohn
nto'8 building, stairs. The
Dalles, Oregon
DtlDUAU. Dkntist. Gas given for the
ininloss extraction of teeth. Also teetb
et on tloweii aluminum plate. Rooms: Sign of
lie I'Jolden Tooth, Second Street.
. 1 in Of-era House Block, Washington Street,
The Imlli. Oregon
f. r. HA VS. B. S. HUNTINGTON H. h. WILSON.
fAYS. HtTNTINGTON & WILSON Attob
.L sjsy-at-law. Offices, French's block over
First National Bank, The Dalles, Oregon.
t.B.Dl'FCB. GEO. - ATKINS. FRANK MF.NEFEK.
DC FUR, W ATKINS & MENEKEE Attorneys-at-la
w Room No. 43, over i'ost
Oflice Buikling, Entrance on Washington Street
The Dalles, Oregon.
Ur h. WILSON Attobney-at-law Rooms
62 and 53, Xew Yogt Block, Second Street,
the Ltalles, Oregon.
I
o
9 J-
c
I'll
11
ABETPIPTIV
TFrST CLA98
Tie Idkrswt, Fmstert and Finest In the World.
: . raHaengerat-comodationa nneicllea.
. raKuenger accomodations nneicelleo.
KEW YORK. 10ND0HDERRY AND GLASGOW
NJSW YORK, GIBRALTER and NAPLts,
At regular intervals.
SALOON, SECOND-CLASS AND STEERABE
rates on lowest terms to and from the Drinctole
S30TCH. IKOLISH. E133 a ALT. COMTIHEWTAT. w rCTn.
Excursion tlcketa arailable to return bT either the tic
tureaque Clyde North of Irelanrt or Naples Glbraftai
Drtfu ? Orlsn fw isj Amnnt st lowest Eittt
APPlT to any of our 1kI Agents or to
IlENDUKSON hkotheks, Chicago, in.
A. HUDSON, Agent.
The Dalles, Or.
ALL KINDS OF
Seed Wheat,
OflTS RH1 BARLEY,
-For Sale by-
C. L. Schmidt,
At the Wasco Warehouse.
French & co.,
BANKERS.
TRANSACT A GENERAL BANKING BCSINE8S
Letters of Credit issued available in the
Eastern States. -
Sight Exchange and- Telegraphic
Transfers sold on New York, Chicago, St.
Louis, San Francisco, Portland Oregon,
Seattle .Wash., and various points in Or
egon and Washington.
' Collections made at all points on fav
orable terms.
GO
Ha Wanted Hollar.
Tax Collector Stewart comes in for his
bare of amusing incidents. The other
day a fat, little, undersized, gray headed
negro man waddled into the apartment
for taxpayers It was early in the morn
ing and be was the only taxpayer there.
By getting on tiptoes the old negro could
juat peep through the window between
the apartments; but no one in the tax
office seemed to see. him. At dast .Mr.
Stewart's attention was attracted by
various and sundry noises.
"What is it uncle?" asked Mr. Stewart
"Mawnin, boss, tnawnin. I jee' want
ed ter fin out how much my ole lady's
tax wuz, boss. Tm 'bout sho' it's erbout
six-forty."
Mr. Stewart consulted the tax books.
"Only five-forty."
''Boss," said the old fellow in a dubious
tone, "I specs yon better look ergin. I'm
sho' it mus be six-forty."
In spite of all the, old- tax collector
could say the old fellow handed him
$0.40. The tax collector returned the
old man a dollar and gave him a re
ceipt. "Thankee, boss, thankee," said the old
negro when be. saw the dollar returned.
He pocket the dollar and departed with
the receipt..
The next morning Mr. Stewart met
the same old negro fellow on a street
car. When the nesro saw Mr. Stewart
he broke into a laugh. ,
"Look here, uncle; why did yon want
to pay more tax than was necessary?"
"Well, it wuz dis way, boss: 1 wanted
a dollar. 1 didn't know 'zactly how ter
git 'er. 1 paid you $6.40, didn't 1, boss?
1 goes borne an tells the ole lady 1' dun
paid Mr. Stuard $6.40. Dat dollar be
longs to me." -Atlanta Herald.
A Practical Joke.
The British sense of humor frequently
finds its expression in practical jokes,
and the young "scion of the aristocracy"
enjoys with artless glee a species of fun
that an American would feel was adapt
ed only for schoolboys. The following
playful manifestation is reported from
over the water as having recently oc-
i cnrred in a well known country house.
I A nnmnnn. .. ...I .toot. J!bniu rcomHi,,-
J
, oi me government arnveu ai a menu s
house where he was due for a week's
visit, and was met at the door by a tall
footman whose familiar and impudent
greeting immediately aroused the ire of
the old gentleman. He mentally re
solved to report the fellow's insolence to
bis master.
What was bis surprise and horror,
however, when the servant, assuming
the attitude of a prize fighter about to
begin operations, danced around him,
intercepting his movements at every
turn. "Is the man mad?" thought the
startled statesman: "surely he has taken
leave of his senses." In vain he spoke
soothingly to the supposed maniac; the
creature, who was of huge proportions,
circled threateningly around him. and
it was only after a few minutes of really
uncomfortable anxiety that the indig
nant guest found himself the victim of
a little practical joke on the part of the
eldest son of his host. New York Trib
une. What Wit Is.
No one has ever told as exactly what
wit is. Dr. Isaac Barrow, a famous
English divine and a man of brilliant
wit himself, has given the best definition
yet known, and he confesses that "often
it consist eth in cue hardly knows what"
j Be says, in his old fashioned Btyle:
' "Sometimes it lieth in a pat allusion
' to a known story, or in seasonable appli
' cation of a trivial saying or in forging
1 an opposite tale. Sometimes it playeth
. in words and phrases, taking advantage
' from the ambiguity of their sense or the
, affinity of their sound; sometimes it
j lurketh under an odd similitude; some
; times it is lodged in a sly question, in a
i smart answer, in a quirkish reason, in a
I shrewd imitation, a tart irony, a lusty
! hyperbole or a startling metaphor; some-
times uu affected simplicity and some
j times a presumptuous bluntness giveth
j it being; sometimes it arises from a
i lucky - hitting npon what is strange;
sometimes from a .crafty wrestling or
obviousmatter to the purpose."
Isn't this excellent? Study this clause
and find a witticism to match it. 1
have not given the entire definition, but
just enough to stimulate some one to
look it up for himself. New York Borne
' '
.
Jonrnal .
Curious Legal Tender.
" Almost every age and tribe, as well as
every epoch, has had its peculiar cur
rency or medium of barter and exchange.
! Knt
! i j i 1 . . , . , .
! 'ad and paper, but Such Out Of the Way
! articles as bits of glass, shells, beads,
: . ... - . i j . .
stones, soap, bits of various colored cloth
and numerous otner objects, some of
them absolutely valueless to our way of
f looking at the matter.
The Burmese, Karens, Hangese and
Ghans have no coined money, lead and
1 silver in bullion being the ordinary ten
! der in trade, weight and purity being the
! standard of value. For a long time salt
I was the ordinary money of the Abyssin
' ians.
.Dried fish has long been, and ia even
today to a certain extent, the legal ten
der of Iceland.' Shad scales are also the
-j medium of exchange in many of the
i North Sea islands. St. Louis Republic
!
Hundreds of Professors.
In the counties of Luzerne, Schuylkill,
Carbon and Northumberland, Pa., there
are 47S men who insist upon the title of
"professor." This include musicians,
teachers of music, schoolmasters, two
sleight-of-hand men, one ventriloquist,
four sluggers or "professors of sparring,"
nine dancing masters, two oyster openers
and twelve drink mixers or bartenders.
Twenty years ago the title was a Bcarce
one in the coal fields. It was worn only
by college teachers and it carried a
weight with it Bazleton Sentinel.
Wby They An Called 'Copper."
Fifty years ago policemen ' wore no
uniforms, their badge of office being
merely a copper shield. It -was from
this shield that .they took their name of
"coppers," which is often diminished to
"cops." Macon McCormick in New
The Weekly Ghroniele.
OFFICIAL PAPER OF WASCO COUNTY.
Entered at the Postoffice at The Dalles, Oregon,
as second-class matter.
. SUBSCRIPTION RATES.
BY KAIL (POSTAGE PEIPAID) IN ADVANCE.
Weekly, 1 year f l 80
" 6 months. 0 75
" 8- " .. 080
Dally, 1 year. 6 00
" S months. .". 3 00
" per " 0 50
Address all communication to " THE CHRON
ICLE," The Dalles, Oregon. .
HILL WARNED.
The New York IforM recently deliv
ered a "lecture" addressed "To Senator
Hill." It closed with these words:
' "The Democratic State Committee, will
meet in this city, tomorrow -under your
direction. It will call a state convention
to elect delegates to Chicago. It intends
to fix upon February 22 as the -date of
that convention. -
"You know that we are not your en
emy. You know that we have upheld
yea in every step in your political career.
Yon know with what vigor we supported
you for governor in 1884 and again in
1888. You know t hat we first proposed
and advocated your election to the sen
ate against your own inclination. You
know that we strengthened yon in the
recent fight to save the legislature at
almost any peril. You know, in brief,
that there is no political achievment in
your record which you do not owe in a
small degree to our free, independent
support. ,
"Orf the other hand
"We know that you mean to be
straigtforward and honest. AVe know
that you are daring and far-sighted. We
know that you are in sympathy with the
masses. We know you are poor. We
know you have never stained the execu
tive power by yielding to greedy corpor
ations and corrupting monopolies. Wc
know that you have won from Mr. Cleve
land much of the party enthusiasm
which he posseseed in 1884. We know
! that your control of the state committee
is absolute. We know how great must
be your temptation to use it absolutely.
"But we warn you to beware of this
dangerous scheme.
. "It is wrong.
"You are playing with fire. You are
forging knives for your enemies..
"Governor don't."-. -
The Ortgonian says: .. . .
Astoria and The Dalles think no work
ought to be done on the Lower Willam
ette and Columbia Rivers because if
would benefit Portland onlv. - Iiet us
see how a wider application of this prin
ciple would work. Why should a good
word be said for a' railroad to Astoria?
It would benefit Astoria onlv. And why
should an appeal be made for construc
tion of a portage road at The Dalles on
the Oregon side? It would benefit the
town of The Dalles only, while a road on
the Washington side would serve the
country equally well, perhaps better.
Come to think of it, there is no commun
ity of interest in a state.- Every locality
for itself, and the devil take the hind
most. Whatever may be true of Astoria it is
not true that The Dalles is opposed to
the deepening ot the channel of the lower
Columbia.' But The Dalles people, if we
may speak for them, claim, ntl with
absolute justice,' that a portage at the
Dalles is of more importance to a greater
number of people and a wider extent of
territory than a deep channel from Pott
land to Astoria. It is utterly untrue
that a portage at the Dalles would ben
efit The Dalles only. The Dalles has
abundance of transportation facilities
both by rail and water. What The
Dalles would insist upon is, that if the
present five cent congress is only going
to appropriate a few hundred thousand
dollars for the improvement of the Col
umbia that that sum should be devoted
to the Dalles.portage. A small amount
of money devoted to this purpose would
be of more benefit to a greater number
than if the same amount were spent on
the lower river. A deep channel from
Portland to the eea would benefit Port
land, a portage at the Dalles would ben-
I efit three states. It is beyond question,
however, that there are hundreds of
mossbacks in Portland who fear the
Dalles portage, lest .it should be the
means of earring river freight past that
city to Astoria. The Oregon common
wealth is cursed .with some very small
sou led inhabitants; '
Omaha is a spunky town. The Union
Pacific has for some time presisted in a
system of excessive charges on jobbers
shppers and wholesale dealers for switch
accomodations. The company has for a
long time refused to fulfill its contract for
the construction of a new depot building
in Omaha and in many ways sought to
injure the business interests of that city.
Hence Omaha got its back up las
Wednesday night and the city council
passed an ordinance declaring forfeited
all the franchises granted to the company
by Omaha, and instructed the city attor
ney to tear up every track of the com
pany that is laid on city property. A
big legal fight is expected to ensue. '
.If it be true, as it is reported, that
President Harrison, will not consent to
the appointment of Mr. Simon to the
federal judgeship of the ninth district,
notwithstanding all tha pressure that
has been brought to bear npon him by
the Oregon delegation, the decision
redowns very much to the credit of the
picmurui. At euows mat .ur. iiarri&ou
brings conscience to bear upon the mak
ing of his apointment8 and that no
amount of partisan service will atone
for the lack of the higher qualities that
ought to adorn the judicial bench. Mr.
Simon is a staunch .republican and an
able lawyer but President Harrison, it
would seem, does not consider these
sufficient. ' If Mr. Simon's political
methods, successful though they may
"t"c ai n nya mrcu, were jcsh biiuuj , I en a .
liable to just criticism and more con
sistent and honorable, there cannot be a
doubt he would have captured the
judicial prize. The action of Mr. Harri
ron is only an incident in the official life
of a president who has made fewer mis
takes in his appointments than, any
other president since Abraham Lincoln. '
n ..A T 1 . 1 !. .. ..
The announcement of Mr. Blaine that
be will not be a : candidate for the presi
dency at the next election will effectT
thousands of ais friends and admirers
with a keen sense of personal regret.
No other name in the ranks of the re
publican party has such a multitude of
enthusaistic and devoted followers. No
other name is dreaded half to much by'
the democracy. A second time he
refuses that which he mi?ht have had
for the asking and the sad presumptions'
remains that he will never nil the seat
of honor to which' so many of his
countrymen would have delighted to see
iiiin exalted. .
The unanimous approval of the course
pursued by the administration toward
Patrick Egan, United States Minister
to Chilir was expressed by all of the.
New Yorbmunicipal council of the Irish
National league of America at a meet-
ing held by that body in New Yorkcity
on the Oth inst. The council warmly
endorsed the administration for its sup
port to Mr. Egan, "that distinguished
Irishman whom it had seen fit to honor" .
and a committee of five was appointed
to draw up appropriate resolutions.
Tony Noltner suggests that Blaine, iu
his declining years, may have begun to
aw tll3 triiur Ml 11 1 n ijjuuiivati n,;.
has declined to .run for the presidency
for fear he might endanger his chances
for eternal happiness. ' In that case
Blaine has the advantage of Tony for,
notwithstanding the latter's declining
years years iie continues' to prevaricate
about tin plate and the McKinley tariff
as though it had never been written
"No liar shall inherit the kingdom of
i. , , .
ilea veil. -
Mr. A. Noltner of the Portland bit
patch; who has just returned from a trip
to Washington, D. C., thinks that it is
more than likely that the Cascade locks
will not get a cent of approprion for the
next' two years.. Mr. Noltner is-an
ardent democrat and is supposed to
know, as well as any outsider can, the
intentions of the present five cent con
gress. It is because Mr. Noltner has no
t " : r.,.. Tnnl..
that be is so earnest an advocate for the
dalles portage.
The Hood River Glacier says a coffin
factory is about to be started at that
place. Since the Chronicle has rend
the resolutions of the Hood River demo- .
cratic clnb it has been wondering if the
Glacier really means a real live coffin
factory, so to speak, or if the facetious
editor merely used this form of speech
to indicate that the club intends to pre
pare a numerous lot of candidates for
political interment, against the. ides of
June.
Barney Goldsmith says Blaine is the .
strongest man in the republican party
and he would rather see Blaine nomi
nated than Harrison. Barney must
think the democrats have a dead snre.
thing in the next presidential election or
else his democracy is suspicion".
Hon. W. lir Hill is reported to have
'said that his appointment to the vacant
...iJuMtin ia r.fl id lilo Tlia Dkiwiii
delegation, much to their shame,, still
urge the appointment of Joe Simon.
Free wool and no appropriations for
the improvement of the Columbia river
will not materially strengthen the dem
ocracy Jf Eastern Oregon.
A genius inTacoma has lately evolved
a plan for superceeding streetcars by the
use of a traveling sidewalk.
The total number of patients in the
Oregon insane asylem is 764--.524 males
and 240 females.
Arrangements are being made to bold
an assessors convention st Salem on the
20th inst.
A private telegram announced yester
day the opening of the Great Northern
all-rail line to Seattle, Wash., vfo the
Great Norther io Nieche and the Cana
dian Pacific and Seattle and Montana
roads. Regular transcontinental rates
will apply on all freight. , - ' ' ,
ATitusville, Pa., tannery, 1' 'years
old, now employs over 300 -bands with a
pay roll of over $11,000 per month.. A
three-story building, 50x250 feetj is
going up for the manufacture of fancy
leather and 160 feet addition to the vat
house is under way. - - The, firm nows
turns out 1,000 sides of . upper leather a
day. Buffalo Exprest. " : '