cr
THE DALLES WEEKLY CHRONICLE, FRIDAY, JANUARY 8; 1892.
UNCLE WILLIAM'S PICTURE.
;Jncle William, last July,
Bad his picture took.
'p' "Bare it done, of coarse,'" says L
Jess tbe way you look!"
(All dressed up. be was, fer the
Barbecne and jubilee
The Old Settlers belt.) So he
Last he had it took.
Lido she'd coaxedaad begged and plead,
Sence her mother went;
Bat he'd cough and shake his head
At all argyment;
, Mebby clear bis throat and say
"What's my likeness 'mount to, hey,
Now, with mother gone away
From us, like she went?"
Bat we'd projick'd round, tell we
Got it figgcred down
Bow we'd git him, Lide and me,
Drivin into to town:
Bragged how well he looked, and fleshed
Up around the face, and freshed
With the morning air; and b reeked
His coat collar down.
The Brilliant Student's Dlletaata. ''
I A Harvard student told me an amua
1 fag- story about himself the other day.
' It seems that recently his mother had a
' young lady guest at their .home on the I
; Back Bay, and when he came from col- !
lege in the afternoon he wae introduced I
to her. At dinner also she sat opposite '
him at the table. He paid little atten- ;
! tion to the fair visitor, as his mind was
engrossed with a problem in his lessons.
' However, his brothers were as assiduous I
i as possible in entert ining her. As it I
happened, tbe latter had engagements !
out that evening, and, as Mrs. A. had 1
promised Miss B. to have one of her sons i
take her to the theater, it fell to the lot !
of my friend George, the Harvard man. ;
He accepted tbe situation gracefully,
and in due time the young couple set off .
i for the theatre. Arriving, George left ;
his companion at one side of the lobby
CooIimm in a Mixed College.
, There is a coolness between the boys
i and the girls of tbe Stanford university,
i It all came about from a question of pro
j priety. The boys garve a ball in their
; dormitory hall on Monday night, to
' which they invited ail the girl students,
1 as well as the professors. Elaborate !
KNOCKING OUT A
JEHU.
preparations were made, and the young
men anticipated an evening of enjoy
ment. They hired a band, and had the
dormitory beautifully decorated.
One or two of the more modest and re
tiring of the maidens in the girls' dormi
tory were shocked at. the avowed inten
tion of some of the girls to attend the
ball, and called a meeting of the girls, at
which there was a long discussion of the
affair.
Many of the fair students said they
could see no harm in going to the ball as
long as the professors were willing, but
All so providential! Why,
Now he's dead and gone.
Picture 'pears so lifelike I
Want to start him on
Them old tales he ust to tell.
And old talks, so sociable.
And old songs be song so well
'Fore his voice was gone!
Face is sad to Lide, and they1!
Sorrow in the eyes
Kisses it sometimes, and lays
It away and cries;
I smooth down her hair, and 'low
He is happy, anyhow.
Bein there with mother now
Smile and wipe my eyes.
James Whitcomb Riley.
while he stentiednB to the box office and ! tbe more Plish damsels read a strong
purchased the tickets; then, turning ; lecture on the evils of such domgs, and,
about, he looked toward the place where I " vote, there was a majority in favor
he had parted from the young lady, and : of not attending the ball. So none of
was surprised to see half a dozen there, I Ulem wem,
and ye gods! is it possible? he could
not tell which was his precious charge!
Here was a dilemma.
George said he immediately decided
that, rather than risk speaking to the
wrong person, be would stand still till
the young lady spoke to him. So he
gazed at his tickets for what seemed to
him an age, but was probably only a
minute, when Miss B. came up and said,
"I fear you did not recognize me." "Oh,
yes' yes " stammered George, equivo
cating "yes, I did: I thought they had
was considering what was best to do in
How the Indian Prays.
"Prayer is the soul's sincere desire,
unuttered or expressed." And the man
ftppnf pnrpRsinp ilpsirA inav differ wide-
ly. The Indian may be as religious as is j he matter." Boston Herald.
the Presbyterian, yet he never kneels , , . , . ,,
, , J L, , . A Story from the American Indians.
when he prays. He never addresses the ,r , , - .
deity by word of mouth at all. Yet he , f an years. aS abt foun,d a beanl1"
sks for the blessings he needs, and asks i fnl nake' 8.an U d 'xms He
for them with as much faith and M pt 't in a bowl of water and took no-
lice LiiAb eujiiu lettbuers urujipt-Li iuiu tuo
receptacle became living beings. He
experimented and discovered that what
ever he put into the water became alive.
He rubbed some of this snake water on
The boys waited long for the coming
of tbe fair ones, but they came not. At
first the collegians were very angry.
Then they took the dancing floor them
selves and made a "stag" party of it.
They say, however, that for future fes
tivities they will send no invitations to
the girl students. This suits the ultra
modest among the latter, but the sociable
girls feel crushed. San Francisco
Chronicle.
A Tremendous Rarley Farm.
'We have now secured 200.000 acres
much reverence as does his whiter broth- :
er. They want a good corn crop and !
they gather a handful of green twigs or !
grasses, bind thein together with a rev-;
erent faith that the deity is willing and j
able to help them; the' lay the emblems ;
or hang them in a place where the sun
will shine upon them and leave, assured 1
that their prayer has been heard.
It may not be answered. The corn ,
may not prosper right away, but they ;
are in no wise discouraged. They bind (
together another emblem and offer it in
another place. Some places have partic- !
nlar favor. It is believed the deity sees j
them place them there better than in !
some other places. It is simply the j
Christian's idea of sanctuary in another !
form. Chicago Herald.
not given me tne seats I asuea tor, ana ; of and in jjorth Dakota for barley
farms, aad next spring we will send
thousands of German emigrants to that
state from Ohio, West Virginia and In
diana," said Colonel O. M. Towner as
he discussed the future of this great
northern state. Colonel Towner is man
ager of what is best known as the Barley
syndicate of Chicago. During the last
two or three months the company has
succeeded in securing 230,000 acres of
laud in North Dakota, on which it is
proposed to place German farmers to
i raise barley ior malt purposes. Inese
lands have been purchased in Nelson,
Norman, Towner. Ramsey, Steele and
Commercial Women and Husbands
There are a number of commercial j
women traveling with their iiusbands, I
most of them for Chicago business firms, j
although a few represent houses in this .
city and Boston. The lines of goods
they carry vary from stationery and !
maps to hardware and jewelry. One
couple are traveling through the coun
try with a horse and wagon, dealing in 1
sewing machines, while another couple
liis eyes and found that lie could see
things that were actually hidden in the
ground. Concluding that he would
make the liquid more powerful by pnt
ting more snakes into it, he hung up a
number of serpents so that their oil
dropped into the water. By putting
some of the solution thus obtained into
his mouth he could breathe fire, and by
placing some of it in his eyes he could
see in the dark. '
At will he could transform himself
a , , r , . T, ; this purpose.- These emigrants will not
speed. An arrow dipped into the liquid
and shot at any living being, even if it
did not hit its object, would neverthe-
Resentment of the Insults of a Big State
DriTer by a Little Dade. ..
Colonel William Greene Sterrett, of
the Galveston-Dallas News, tells this
story: - . .
"Once, a good many years ago," he
said, ""I was traveling in a stage in
western Texas. It was long before the
snort of the locomotive was heard on
the prairies of that region, over which
the buffalo yet roamed. At one of the
stations a young Englishman and his
wife got in. He was a little fellow and
dressed as a typical Englishman what
we now call a dude. The driver was a
big, raw boned six footer. He was a
noted fighter. .He had never been whip
ped and was a regular terror. H9
eeemed to take a dislike to the little
Englishman from the start. Presently
he stopped the stage, got down, came
back and threw open the door.
" 'Here, he said to the Englishman,
'you come out of that and get np on the
seat with me. There ain't room for you
in there.' The Englishman didn't move.
'Come out, I tell you,' roared the driver.
The Englishman just sat still. . 'If you
don't come out, 111 haul yon out by the
legs,' shouted the Jehu. Then the rest
of us expostulated with the driver. I
was too tired to fight and couldn't get at
my gun, so I just expostulated along
with the rest. We told the driver there
was plenty of room inside; that the Eng
lishman was not crowding us, and that
j if he (the driver) insulted or injured any
of his passengers he would be discharged
by the stage company. The driver by
this time was wild. He swore he was
in command of that stage and that he
proposed to run it to suit himself, and if
that blankety blank cuss didn't come
out he'd pull hjm out.
" 'All right,' said the Englishman, at
last. 'I will come out, and when I am
out I will whip you soundly.'
"He got out slowly. We all felt sorry
for him and sorrier for his wife. She
didn't seem scared or worried, though,
and all she said was:
" 'Charley, don't let him scratch your
face.'
"Well, when the little Englishman
got out he took his coat off and handed
it back into the stage. Then he started
THE DALLES MERCANTILE CO.,
(Successors to BROOKS & BEERS.)
The Dalles,
Oregon.
Jobbers and Deal rs in
Ejeijeral efcliaiidige,
. $laple and FanciJ Drij lood$,
Gents' Furnishing Goods, Boots and Shoes,
Hats and Caps. Etc.
Staple and Fancy Groceries, Hardware. Flour, Bacon,
Headauarters for
Teas, Coffees, Dried Fruits, Canned Goods, Etc.
4-
HAY, GRAIN AND PRODUCE
Of all kinds Bought and Sold at Retail or in Car
load Lots at Lowest Market Rates.
Free Delivery to Boat and Cars and all parts of the City.
390 -A.3STD 394 SECOITID STEEET.
BOBT. ZMIA-YS.
Xj. E. CEOWE.
MAYS & CROWE,
-SALE AGENTS FOR THE CELKBRATED-
Bottineau counties.
It is the opinion of the managers of I toward the driver and the driver started
this company that barley can be most
successfully grown in that state, and
they have the conviction of their belief
sufficiently to purchase these lands and
to send out emigrants from other states.
The Germans are chosen on account of
their knowledge of barley culture for
oe tenants, bat owners of the land, it
being sold to them on easy terms. The
crops will be bought by the company
iC3B u e.aUu1,)tl mi, , a demand for barlev.-St. Paul Pioneer
buuw water auu puinieu ut any game
would immediately start for the latter
and slay it. This boy became in this
manner a great wizard. Washington
Star .
The Amateur Actress.
We had rather throw aside this pen
forever than to write a word to discour-
are employing the same method to carry j age any woman who is conscientiously !
Press.
To Celebrate the Muraeillaise.
Another effort is being made by the
inhabitants of Choisy-le-Roi, outside of
Paris, to observe with much solemnity
and ceremonial what is vaguely ealled
the ."Centenary of the Marseillaise."
Choisy-le-Roi claims to possess the dust
lines of gloves, mittens, etc. One worn- ' striving to earn a position on the stage; j f Rong de l'Isle-the composer of ! JUw
an said that the number of women who
had taken to commercial traveling with
in the last year was four times as great
as in the previous year.
"And why shouldn't women go into
this business as well a any other?" she)
demanded. And why shouldn't they?
New York Tribune.
but there are other women some in the
profession, some in the audience to
I whom it is grossly unfair to put forth an
i inexperienced amateur as a star. Con- i
sider, ladies and gentlemen, what a poor,
miserable art that of acting would be if !
anybody could acquire it in a few les- !
hymn who was buried there in 1836,
his birthplace being Lons-le-Sanlnier, in
the department of the Jura. On this ac
count the members of the borough coun
cil consider that they have the right to
take the initiative in organizing a Right
Republican festival this year, as the ilar
seillase, under the title of "Chant de
Guerre de l'Armee du Rhin." was first
Why S onsets are Red.
A shower of a remarkable character
occurred in Sicily on April 24, 1781. Ou
the morning of that day every exposed
place within an extensive district was
found covered with a gray water, which
being evaporated left a deposit nearly a
quarter of an inch in thickness. It was
determined that this solid matter must
have come from Mount Etna. It is cer
tain that vast quantities of solid sub
stances are constantly afloat in the at
mosphere. The sunsets all over the
world are redder to this day on account
of the dust from the mighty eruption in
the Straits of Sunda years ago, which
has not yet entirely settled. Washing
ton Star.
Freuch Bread Laws.
The French baker is not only required
to conform to laws regarding weight,
but he is also told at what price he must
sell his bread. He is further required to
deposit a certain sum of money in the
hands of the municipal authorities as a
surety of good behavior. In the large
fortified cities he has to keep a specified
quantity of flour on hand to provide for
warlike emergencies.
In Germany laws of similar import are
in existence, and are enforced with such
severity that no baker ever dreams of de
fying them. Bakers Helper.
sons, in a year or so, from a private box
stage. It takes a longer time to learn to ; n i A v r j
, h . . ? iv! President Carnot is to be asked to be-
be a carpenter or to play a piano, to be' , -, . ..
a dressmaker or to naint a nature to be me ,1!morary president of the commit
a tvwwriter or tc cut hr troDrlv 1 tee of the te, and appeals for funds
i.Z a cities, and also
A Halloween Experiment.
Halloween is sometimes called "nut
than amateurs who are now willing to
bestow upon the art which includes, em
ploys and dignifies all other arts from
statuesque posing to wig wearing. If
acting could be taught in a day it would
not be so well paid nor so highly esteem
ed, and good acting would not be so un
common. Stephen Fiske in Spirit of the
Times.
The Evolution of the Sword.
As men in early times fought hand to
hand, the oldest specimens of the sword
are short; in fact, the sword is probably
but an evolution of the club, which at
first made of hard wood was gradually
sharpened on one and then on both sides,
so as to inflict a more deadly wound.
Even today we find some savage races
employing wooden weapons. Wood
gave way to stone, which in turn was
displaced by bronze, iron and finally J
steel.
The sword increased in length as men
became more civilized and showed a dis
position to fight farther away from each
other, which required more dexterity in
the use of the weapon. Some specimens
we have of swords of the Middle Ages are
almost if not quite as long as the war
riors who wielded them. During the
Fifteenth century the science of fencing
was invented, when the sword in the
to communes which possess more than
4,000 inhabitants. No date as yet has
been fixed for the celebration of the cen
tenary, to which it is presumed that
every patriotic Frenchman will give his
sentimental and sympathetic if not
practical and pecuniary support.
Paris Cor. London Telegraph
toward him. We heard a sound a good
deal like that made by hitting a steer in
the head with an ax. Down in a heap
went the driver. He was up as quick as
a flash. Down he went again. Actually
that little English dude knocked that
burly six foot driver clean off his feet a
dozen times. How it was done none of
us could tell. The big fellow would
rush at the little 'un with his arms go
ing like flails. Suddenly the little fellow
would make a dash, his right arm would
fly out, an down would - go the driver.
After the dozenth round that driver
called out:
" 'Hold on, stranger hold on! I'm
whipped and throw up my hands. Ton
kin ride anywhere on this stage you darn
please, outside or inside or on the hosses.
You're the boss now; but,' he added,
glaring savagely at the rest of us, 'I kin
lick anybody else on this stage.'
"We didn't expostulate. The English
man climbed back into the stage as
quickly as tie got off. His wife was sat
isfied, for 'Charley's' face wasn't even
scratched. At the next station the driver
explained that if he'd only have got hold
of the little fellow he'd have hugged Mm
to death like a bear; lmi,' he exclaimed,
'every time- just as I was about to. lay
hands on him the ground 'd fly up and
hit me on the back of the head.'
"Who was the little fellow? Oh, a
graduate of Cambridge, and the best
boxer of bis time at the university."
Washington Post.' '
' ' Reorn 9 9 and ' ' Charter Oak' '
STOVES AND RANGES.
Jew Gift Steel Ranges, and Riciarton's -anil Bopton's Furnaces.
We also keep a large and eomplete stoek of
Hardware, Tinware, Granite, Blueware, Silverware, Cutlery,
Barbed Wire, Blacksmiths' Coal, Puiiips, Pipe,
Packing, Plumbers Supplies, Guns,
A mmunition and Sporting Goods.
Plumbing, Tinning, Gun Repairing and Light
Machine Work a Specialty.
COB. 8KCONB AND FEDERAL STS.,
THE DALLES, OREGON.
The E 0. Go-Operative Store
CARRIES A FULL LINK OK
Groceries, Family Supplies, Boots and Shoes,
A Much Travel! Volume.
In opening a package of books wrapped
in tin. the custom honm? inspectors cut
with a knife the binding, by Rnban, of a
"Poor Richard Almanack." The import
er made no claim for damage from the
government, paid the duty, returned the
book to Paris to be rebound aud wrote
an ode. to Diana of Poitiers, goddess of
book lovers, in gratitude for the miracn
lous escape of the text of his Almanack.
The book, rebound, came back fifteen
days ago. The owner supposes that it is
intact, but he does not' know, and he
cannot learn even by paying the duty
again, for the official wants a new in
voice, and the importer is naive enough
to think that he can persuade the official
that the first invoice, which is filed at
the custom house, accurately describes
the book on its fourth voyage across the
Atlantic. New York Times.
crack night," because nuts have always j form of a rapier reached the
point or UeveJopment. Kate
Washington.
taken a conspicuous part in its observ
ance. Two nuts placed in the fire ou
Halloween are named for two lovers.
Should they lie together and burn to
gether, John and Tillie will be a happy
husband and wife, but should the nuts
bounce and fly asunder, the sign is a
bad one. New York Herald.
highest I
Field's I
Delicacy of feeling is not confined to
gentle people, commonly so called. It
is well known, for example, by those
who have to do with men confined in
prison, that such convicts never speak
the hated word "prison," but invariably
use some enphemistit substitute, "this
institution" being perhaps the one of
tenest adopted.
When a Chinese compositor sets type
he places them in a wooden frame twenty-two
by fifteen inches. This frame has
twenty-nine grooves, each for a line of
type, and the type rests in clay to the
depth of a quarter of an inch. The types
are of wood,perfectly square, and the
compositor handles them with pincers.
The first electric telegraph at all de
serving the name was invented by
Messrs. Cooke and Wheatstone, and was
laid on the London and Blackwell rail
way in June, 1837.
Unasked Sympathy.
I cannot touch a piece of velvet with
my fingers or permit the furry side of a
peach skin -to touch my lips without ex
periencing immediately a sort of cold
chill all over .my person. It is not so
very severe, but it is unpleasant Still I
would prefer to living forever under the
ban of such a chill than to be compelled
to meet once a day one of those oleagi
nous bundles of insincerity and pretense,
the unctuous and effusive chap who
thinks you are not properly treated and
never loses an opportunity to tell yon so.
Of course I am aware I am not properly
appreciated, but I detest being told of
the fact by another person, who never
lifts a finger in my behalf, and who only
wags his tongue in my favor when I am
by to see him do it. Detroit Free Press.
Helping One Another.
A seventh ward man rises in the early
dawn of Monday morning and does the
family washing, because his wife has an
: organic heart trouble. After he goes to
I his daily toil, with the consciousness of
t r .1 i. : i .i
uaviug cilucuicu iiiauuty, But? kucs over
and does the washing for the minister's
family. Springfield Homestead.
A Kiisso-Cllinese Railway.
A Russo-Chinese railway is reported
as the objective point of negotiations
now going on between Russian and
Chinese representatives. Russia wants
the right to build a railway from Vladi
vostock, the Pacific terminal of tfye pro
posed Siberian railway, across the north
ern boundary of Corea to Tien-Tsin, and
thence to Shanghai. The alleged ob
ject is quick transit of Chinese tea and
silk to Europe. The Chinese, however,
are very jealous of Russian influence
in the east, and will probably decline
Russian aid in railway building. En
gineering News.
Dr. John Pie'nte, the amateur telescope
maker, is now finishing a 30 inch silver
on glass mirror for Alleghany college,
which, when mounted, will give that in
stitution the largest reflecting telescope
m this country.
An immense flume i being construct
ed near Fresno. Cal.. which will not
only f urnish water for irrigating pur
poses, but will be-used to transport lum
ber needed by farmers living near by.
Blunders of the Teachers.
A friend, himself for many years a
teacher, writes: "The blunders of teach
ers of English literature are sometimes
more amazing than any that are told of
their pupils. I heard the other day of a
woman at the west who, when a class
was reading Tennyson's 'Day Dream,'
explained to them that tbe happy prin
cess, in following her lover 'deep into
the dying day,' went to America! The
laureate would be tickled to know of
this. A year or more ago there was a
discussion in a leading educational jour
nal as to the persons meant in Longfel
low's lines 'To the River Charles,' where
he says:
! "More than this thy name reminds me
Of three friends; all true and tried, etc.
"One writer suggested that they were
Professor Cornelius C. Fulton, Nathaniel
Hawthorne and Charles Sumner. An
other thought that Louis Agassiz's name
should stand in the place of Haw
thorne's, and this was finally accepted
by all concerned. Neither the editor nor
any of his correspondents or readers ap
peared to see the absurdity of making
the name of the river suggest friends
whose names were other than Charles.
Critic
Making the Right Shade.
Those who have sought in vain for
laces to match the color of silk on lamp
shades and other decorative articles may
be able to produce the right shade by
using some of the French tapestry dyes.
One should experiment on a bit of lace,
first to see if the dyes are properly
thinned, so as to get the desired shade.
Any of the thin laces in silk or cotton
take the dyes nicely. Point d'Esprit and
German Valenciennes looking very well
when treated with the yellow shades.
In the Valenciennes several delicate tints
may be used on the light and the heavy
part of the lace, bringing out the design
with excellent effect. In preparing lace
for the dye, brush and press it carefully,
then stretch it upon a board, laying sev
eral thicknesses of paper underneath.
Dip a small bristle brush in the dye and
lay it on freely, i .When nearly dry, lay
the lace on a padded board and press
with a hot iron. New York Post. '
-ALSO A FULL LINK OF-
Carls, Reapers and Mowers, ani all Ms of AiiMhnl
Implements. '
Corner Federal and Third Streets,
THE DALLES, OREGON.
It is pretty hard to be told at the- be
ginning of a long," cold winter that gotd
table services are coming in. - It was
hoped that they had gone out to stay.
A Young Diplomat.
Mrs. Brown I'm afraid td let you haye
a bicycle.
Little Johnnie Don't feel that way,
ma. Even if it did kill me, remember
that it would be the last thing I ever
asked yon for. New York Epoch.
Hactuiers
Harnesses
(Successors to L. D. Frank, deceased.)
OFALL
A General Line of
Horse Furnishing Goods.
EEI-AJCiaiIi3"C3- PEOMPTLY and IsTBATLY" DOINE. A
ff nolesale aud Retail Dealers in Harness, Bridles, Whips, Eorse Blaniets, Etc.
Full Assortment of Mexican Saiilery, Plain or Stamped.
SECOND STREET,
THE DALLES. OR.
mm
fTuiijTRicny
First Class
The Larrot. Fasteat Flout la the WaU
Passenger accomodatlona onexcelJeo.
EW tORinONDONDERRf AND 8 US BOW-
Every Batnrday.
NEW YORK, GIBRAJLTEK and NAPLKS,
Afc retrainr in terra in.
SALOON, SECOND-CLASS AND STEERAGE
rates on lowest terms to and from thp nrtnninlp
SMTCH, XHSUSB, EI3H AU CONTINENTAL FUKTS
Excursion tickets araflnble to return by either the pic
turesqne Clyde North of Ireland or Naples & aibraltai
Bnfti ud Kasr Ordsn lot Anr Amcmt t Lowstt Situ.
Apply to any of oar local Asents or to
HENDERSOX BKOTHE1W, Chicago, III.
T. A. HUDSON. Asrent,
The Dalles, Or.
pott Sale at a Bargain.,
A GOOD
Traction Engine
Has only been run sixty days.
Buffalo Pitts Thresher
Only used two months.
Chopping Mill,
Capable of 15 to 20 tons per day ; oosl
$31.
The above Mill be sold on easy terms.
W.'L. WARD,
The Dalles, Ox.