16
THE OHEMAWA
AM ERICAN
M O R E D I F F IC U L T
A Scottish prison chaplain, recently appointed,
entered one of the cells on his first round of inspec
tion and thus addressed the prisioner who occupied it:
“ Well, my man, do you know7 who I am?”
“ No, nor I dinna care!” was the nonchalant reply,
“ Well, I ’m your new chaplain.”
“ Oh, ye are? Then I hae heard o’ ye before.”
“ And what did you hear?” returned the chaplain,
his curiosity getting the better of his dignity.
“ Well, I heard that the last twa kirks ye were in ye
preached them baith empty; but I can say ye willna
find it quite sae easy to do the same wi’ this.
M E T H IS M A T C H
A tight-fisted old man, feeling very sick, asked a
friend to recommend a physician. The friend named
a certain specialist.
“ Is he very expensive?” asked the sick man.
Well, not so very. He’ll charge you $4 for the
first visit and $2 for each
» one after that.” •
The old fellow soon afterward walked into the
office of the physician named by his friend and upon
being admitted to the consulting room, planked down
$2, remarking: “ Well, doctor, here I am again.”
The physcian calmly picked up the money and put
it in a drawer which he locked securely. The sick
man looked on expectantly awaiting the next move.
“ Well, I ’m ready to be examined,” he said at
length.
“ I don’t think it’s necessary,” replied the shrewd
specialist. “ There’s no need to do it again. Keep
right on taking the same medicine. Good day, sir.”