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THE UNITED AMERICAN
APRIL 1925
A Mother’s Observations
By Alice C. Schweigert
'THERE IS JUST one question that I have often
1 desired to put to the mothers of young girls, when
I hear them say that their daughters have been stay
ing out late, and that they have no knowledge of
where their daughters were when they did not
arrive home until long after midnight, and other
things of like import — and that question is, “Why
did you not know where your daughter was at that
time of night?” If a girl twelve years old has a
mother, that mother is the one person to know where
the daughter is every day and night of her life. There
is none other that can or should take the place of a
mother in the protection of a daughter, and it is the
mother’s duty to accompany her daughter wherever
she goes, or to see that she is accompanied by some
other trustworthy person. There should be no taking
for granted in matters of this kind. How often we hear
mothers say, “Oh, dear, I can’t do a thing with her;
she doesn’t mind me at all any more.” That mother
has reached the danger line, and if she doesn’t form
a determination and act on it, to control her child,
she is rapidly approaching the time when she will
receive the “shot in the back” that all mothers get
who so betray the sacred trust reposed in them. It
may not indeed be the leaden bullet carrying death
to the physical body, but it will be a “shot” just as
deadly and much less merciful. It would be interest
ing to inquire of that mother in California, who was
Recently struck down by the hand of her daughter,
why she did not know where her daughter was and
who her associates were, when at the age of twelve
she was not at home nights. There is no excuse for
such negligence and it invariably brings its own
punishment.
There seems to be an exaggerated restlessness in
the youth of today, a tendency toward lawlessness,
a sort of breaking away, as it were, from past tradi
tions and customs, and they do many unaccountably
wild things that startle many people who have their
preconceived notions of how young people should
conduct themselves, with the result that almost every
body is asking, “What is the matter with the young
people?” No one seems to be able to answer the
question and everybody just keeps on wondering
about it.
It has become the custom in searching for answers
to problems that have arisen during the last four or
five years to look back to the World War and there
read the reasons for many things as they now are. It
is, to say the least, a convenient thing to do and we
will grant that present conditions are affected in result
by many influences arising from that event.
Someone has said that “Youth must be served.”
It sounded good to us. We have repeated it over and
over, until it has been accepted into our mental
attitude toward our young. Now, upon calmer reflec
tion we can see no reason why youth should he served
during this epoch any more than at any other time.
We have come to the realization that we have so
generously served youth that we have served it to its
own undoing. That, we take it, is one of the reasons
why they have become such an enigma as to conduct.
We have been working on the presumption that
if conditions were made ideal for children, surround
ings pleasant and beautiful, every desire gratified,
nothing required of them but to enjoy, that when they
arrived at maturity we should have perfect men and
women, of high ideals and character. The pity of it
all is that we have missed it so far. The theory sounds
well, but the application has been a miserable failure.
It must be acknowledged that the noblest characters
in history, and the persons we have personally known
to be worthy of honor and emulation, have not been
those who have had every desire gratified, but rather
the unconquerable ones — those who have risen in
spite of what seemed insurmountable difficulties.
It is undeniably the duty of the older generation
to endeavor to the best of its ability to make for the
younger conditions as perfect as may be for right
living and formation of character. But it is also the
right of the older generation to demand of youth
something in return. Probably the attitude of parents
toward their children in this respect it too lax. Where
they have expected little, they should .demand much.
Where they have suffered insult, they should demand
respect. No parent should expect a teacher to control
a child if he or she has failed to do so. Too many
parents expect teachers to supply what they have
lacked, and thus make up for their carelessness or
deficiency. Many incidents, with which all are fa
miliar, have occurred during the last year that have
impressed upon us that it is not always the children of
the slums or those living in dirt and squalor that are
criminals, but just as many in luxurious surroundings
have been spoiled and pampered into criminality. Par
ents, it is just “up to you.” There is no other agency
that can take your place. It is for you to know where
your sons and daughters spend their time and who
are their associates. There is no use throwing up
your hands and saying it can’t be done. It can be done.
It will doubtless cost some sacrifice of time and money,
but no price is too great to pay. Give up any pleasure
of your own to keep an eye on the boy or girl, and
seek companionship with him or her. Mothers, give
up your clubs or other activities if need be and take
your place at your daughter’s side, at the show, at
the dance, or wherever she finds her pleasure. If]
you find out that she is deceiving you, never relax
your vigilance a moment. Fathers, make it your chief
business to so guard your boy that he may grow to
be the greatest pride of your life. Never weary in
this and success is sure to crown your efforts. This
is the most patriotic service parents can render our
country. “Youth should serve,” should give a little
in return for all that has been given to them by a I
generous Commonwealth. If more had been trained!
for serving we would hear less of law infractions and!
debauchery. Service should ever be the glory of
youth.
Wouldst thou possess thy heritage, essay,
By use to render it thine own!
What we employ not, but impedes our way,
That which the hour creates, that can it use alone!
— Goethe, I