Wednesday, December 1, 2021 The Nugget Newspaper, Sisters, Oregon
11
Commentary...
Flexibility is key to resilience
By Edie Jones
Columnist
While reading the com-
mentary in the October 13
issue of The Nugget entitled
<Resilient Sisters must be
ambidextrous,= it occurred
to me that what was being
talked about was flexibility.
Mitchell Luftig, the
author, was referring to
a concept that Michele
Gelfand of the University
of Maryland referenced as
knowing which circum-
stances in life require tight-
ening restrictions and when
it9s OK to loosen them. The
article9s premise was in rela-
tion to the collective threat
of the pandemic. I9d like us
to think about it in relation
to all aspects of life.
In studying the work
of H. Stephen Glen, in
his <Developing Capable
People= program, I learned
the importance for individu-
als to perceive themselves
as being capable, having
significance, and believing
they have personal influ-
ence. To achieve this they
needed skills that help them
move through life. One
of the categories of those
skills he called <Systemic
Skills.= These consisted of
knowing limits, accepting
consequences, and being
responsible. His work
emphasized that in order to
be responsible an individual
needs to adapt and be flexi-
ble, to know how to respond
to the situation he or she is
in.
If you think about it,
these are skills we teach our
kids. Every parent can relate
to instructing their children
that it9s OK to behave one
way at home while there are
different rules when visiting
grandparents. Even going to
school has times that teach
flexibility. Currently, in the
classroom you keep your
distance, wear your mask,
don9t touch other people,
sit quietly, and listen to the
teacher. During recess, the
rules change and there is
much more <looseness= in
what you can and can9t do.
Kids learn very quickly
when restrictions are tighter
and when a looser way of
behaving is OK.
We adults follow these
same kinds of norms within
our workplaces and social
connections. Granted, much
has changed in what is
appropriate and our society
is generally much <looser=
than years back; how-
ever, there are still socially
acceptable ways of behaving
that change by the situation
presented. They may depend
on where you live, your sta-
tus in society, your age, or
whether you are in a church
or a gymnasium. Most adults
learn these early, and con-
sciously or unconsciously
adapt to the situation with-
out difficulty.
One of the other areas
of skills taught by Glen is
<Judgmental Skills,= the
ability to use wisdom and
evaluation. I believe these
were also being addressed in
the article and are skills most
of us try to put into practice
as often as possible. Again,
skills parents diligently try
to instill in their young chil-
dren, so they have the abil-
ity to make good choices
when they reach the teen
years.
The title of the arti-
cle referred to <Resilient
Sisters= implying that col-
lectively our community
has the characteristics of
being resilient. What, I ask,
does this mean? In the book
<Raising Resilient Children=
by Robert Brooks, Ph.D.,
and Sam Goldstein, Ph.D.,
we learn there are many
qualities that make up resil-
iency. Some of these are the
ability to solve problems
constructively, the develop-
ment of coping strategies
that promote growth, and the
ability to define what you do
and don9t have control over,
focusing attention on where
you can make a difference.
All of these are quali-
ties we want our kids to
grow up with, so as adults
they can become self-reliant
individuals, capable of han-
dling whatever comes their
way. These are also qualities
I9m sure most of us want in
everyone who makes up the
community of Sisters.
I was recently talking
with a colleague who said
he felt many have forgot-
ten how to interact effec-
tively with others. The arti-
cle I9ve referred to states
that Gelfand is optimistic
that America will learn to
communicate better about
collective threats and be
encouraged to deal with
them collectively. Let9s
hope so. I believe this means
there is hope that we will be
able to respond to our cur-
rent state with a mindset that
considers what is best for
society and not just what we
individually desire.
This time that we9re in,
<the COVID years,= pres-
ents many opportunities to
teach our kids. There are so
many <teachable moments=
taking place. First off, learn-
ing to adapt and be flex-
ible is paramount to being
a responsible adult. In addi-
tion, using good judgment
in solving problems, coping
with the world as it is, fig-
uring out what we can influ-
ence and where we can make
a positive difference, are
built into every day we are
living through. Everything
we do teaches our kids
something, good and bad.
Let9s strive to be role mod-
els of the good things we
want to teach. Then our
community will truly be
resilient.
CALL FOR 2022 OPTIONS!
health insurance open
enrollment starts Nov. 1
Individual & Family Health Plans
Jonie Peck — Owner & Agent
503-807-2148 in Sisters
sapphiremoonhealthinsurance.com
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Entertainment & Events
DEC
The Suttle Lodge Live Music with Ezza Rose
6 to 8 p.m. Fireside Show series. Doors open
at 5. Tickets at TheSuttleLodge.com/Happenings.
DEC
Outdoor Stage at Sisters Depot Live Music: Doc Ryan
Trio 6 to 8:30 p.m. $5 cover charge. Reservations
recommended. For info call 541-904-4660 or go online to
www.sistersdepot.com.
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THUR
Open 10 a.m. to midnight
175 N. Larch St.
541-549-6114
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DEC
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Sat. & Sun., Dec. 4 & 5
10 a.m.-4 p.m.
Come join us for some good old-fashioned fun!
Explore our 80 acres and fi nd a tree! Hot cocoa,
chili, smores, sledding! You bring warm
clothing, warm hearts, and lots of smiles!
Cost: Donations of any amount go to Young Life or other local nonprofi ts.
Directions: Head west on Hwy. 20, through Sisters, past Black Butte Ranch.
Turn LEFT on McAllister Road and follow the signs for Christmas Tree Hunt.
Questions? Shannon 206-356-0972
THUR
DEC
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FRI
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SAT
Skybox at Sisters Depot Live Music: Pete Kartsounes 6
to 8:30 p.m. $5 cover charge. Seating limited, purchase
tickets at www.tockify.com/sisterscountry. For info call 541-
904-4660 or go online to www.sistersdepot.com
The Suttle Lodge Live Music with Olivia Awbrey
6 to 8 p.m. Fireside Show series. Doors open
at 5. Tickets at TheSuttleLodge.com/Happenings.
Skybox at Sisters Depot Live Music: Rudolf Korv
6 to 8:30 p.m. $5 cover charge. Seating limited, purchase
tickets at www.tockify.com/sisterscountry. For info call 541-
904-4660 or go online to www.sistersdepot.com
Outdoor Stage at Sisters Depot Live Music: Eric
Leadbetter 6 to 8:30 p.m. $5 cover charge. Reservations
recommended. For info call 541-904-4660 or go online to
www.sistersdepot.com.
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