Wednesday, September 16, 2020 The Nugget Newspaper, Sisters, Oregon
7
Commentary...
Gratitude is critical to well-being
By Mitchell Luftig | Columnist
During challenging times it is
helpful to remind ourselves that we
still have reasons to be grateful. But
many of us 4 even in the best of cir-
cumstances 4 find it difficult to sus-
tain a feeling of gratitude.
There are important reasons to
raise your gratitude I.Q.
Grateful people experience:
" Increased happiness and positive
mood.
" More satisfaction with life.
" Less materialism.
" Less burnout.
" Better physical health.
" Better sleep.
" Less fatigue.
" Lower levels of cellular
inflammation.
" Greater resiliency.
" More patience, humility, and
wisdom.
When practiced by groups,
gratitude:
" Increases pro-social behaviors.
" Strengthens relationships.
" May
help
employee
effectiveness.
" May increase job satisfaction
(www.positivepsychology.org).
One way to become more grateful
is to study the characteristics of indi-
viduals born with an abundance of
gratitude and to model our behavior
after them.
Grateful individuals:
" Recognize the thoughtful actions
of others.
" Express their appreciation to
those who treat them with generosity,
kindness, and helpfulness.
" Reciprocate good deeds and pay
them forward to strangers.
" Use their gratitude to discover the
conditions for happiness in their lives.
Gratitude itself is a social glue that:
" Helps grateful people find
individuals whose thoughtfulness
makes them a good candidate for a
relationship.
" Reminds grateful people of
the goodness of their existing
relationships.
" Binds grateful people 4 through
their expressions of appreciation and
acts of thoughtfulness 4 to their
friends and partners.
If you want to become more
grateful:
" Value your relationships,
especially the people who act in a
thoughtful manner, more than your
prosperity or the material goods that
you possess.
" Recognize the conditions for
happiness that already exist in your
life rather than fantasizing how happy
you would be if you could only live
someone9s more glamorous life.
" Replace the cynical view that
people will only look out for their
own selfish interests with the opti-
mistic view that people often treat
each other in a thoughtful manner.
" Value acts of generosity, kind-
ness, and helpfulness as a gift, given
to you freely, rather than something
<due you= because you are so much
more important than everyone around
you.
We can also learn to become more
grateful by practicing evidence-
based gratitude exercises. Gratitude
exercises have been shown to have
positive benefits for our well-being,
happiness, life satisfaction, grateful
mood, grateful disposition, and posi-
tive affect. Gratitude exercises may
also result in decreases in depressive
symptoms.
Here are some of the best-
researched gratitude exercises.
Keeping a gratitude journal
According to Robert Emmons,
you will receive the most benefit
from writing about your experience
of gratitude when you:
" Make a conscious decision (set
your intention) to become happier
and more grateful and you view the
act of journaling as a valuable tool to
get you there.
" Elaborate on a particular thing
for which you9re grateful (rather than
constructing a superficial list).
" Focus on the people to whom
you are grateful rather than the things
people have given you or you9ve
acquired.
" Reflect on what your life would
have been like without certain bless-
ings that you9ve received.
" Record events that were unex-
pected or surprising as these often
elicit higher levels of gratitude.
" Keep the experience <fresh= by
writing in your journal just once or
twice a week.
" Take the time to really relish and
savor the gifts of thoughtfulness that
you receive.
Gratitude visits can make us feel
significantly happier a month later,
according to Martin Seligman.
Here are the steps to take for a
successful gratitude visit:
1. Recall the face of someone who
years ago did or said something that
changed your life for the better4
someone whom you never really
thanked but with whom you could
meet in the next week or so.
2. Write a letter of about 300
words in which you very specifically
describe just what this person did for
you and how it affected your life.
3. Arrange to meet (or Zoom) with
this person, remaining vague about
the purpose of the visit.
4. Read the letter to them, noting
both their reaction and your own.
5. After you finish reading the let-
ter discuss its contents and the feel-
ings they evoked in each of you.
If you9re not quite ready for a grat-
itude visit, follow the first two steps
of the gratitude visit and write a grati-
tude letter.
Simply the act of writing the grati-
tude letter, whether or not you mail
it, is likely to make you feel happier.
Seligman also recommends the
What-Went-Well Exercise (Three
blessings).
Every day for a week, before you
go to bed, write down three things
that went well that day and why you
think they went well.
If something special happened
that day, be sure to include it, but the
events you write about don9t have
to be earthshaking. Participants who
persisted, despite their initial awk-
wardness about explaining why they
thought an event went well, usually
found themselves still completing the
What-Went-Well Exercise six months
later.
What are you grateful for? Time to
find out!