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Wednesday, July 22, 2020 The Nugget Newspaper, Sisters, Oregon
Your Story
MATTERS
Audry Van Houweling, PMHNP
Columnist
COVID stole
my dopamine,
now what?
Excitement. Pleasure.
Novelty. Anticipation.
Reward. The <zest,= the
<looking forward to,= and
the <passion.= The common
denominator? Dopamine.
It is the brain chemical
we chase in our society and
what we have a hard time
living without. We must
thank dopamine for the gusto
it gives us, the inspiration,
the drive, and innovation,
but in our popular culture
so reinforced by a mindset
of scarcity where whatever
<is= is simply not enough,
dopamine has hypnotized so
many of us into restlessness,
discontentment, and distrac-
tion. Our dependence on the
dopaminergic excitement or
trepidation of <what9s next=
robs us of being present in
the <what9s now.=
We become antsy, impa-
tient, frustrated, and even
hopeless in times when our
once-trusted dopamine fixes
fade from our reach.
COVID has undoubtedly
been a dopamine disruptor.
Financial reward, opportu-
nities to perform, incentives
for validation, leisure, the
chance to be noticed, antici-
pated escapes, and methods
of distraction have all been
compromised. As they have
dwindled, many of us have
attempted to hold on to
dopamine9s spell. Alcohol
consumption has spiked, the
pantry door has been opened
a few too many times, drama
has been manufactured, we
get lost in the fight or flight
as we defend our side of the
fence, and point fingers at
others.
Certainly more uplifting,
some too have found ways
to create, to serve, to give, to
protect, to advocate.
Dopamine is central to it
all.
<I don9t feel motivated,=
say the vast majority of
clientele that walk in my
office these days. <I don9t
know what to look forward
to.= <I don9t feel excited for
anything.=
As children and adoles-
cents suddenly lost many of
the social incentives and val-
idation from physical school
and navigated the blurry
experience of virtual learn-
ing, many simply stated,
<what9s the point?=
For a lot of us, COVID
has quieted our <give a
darn9s= about a lot of what
seemed to be important pre-
pandemic. I personally have
made some efforts to keep a
morning routine as I hastily
run a brush through my hair
and slap on some makeup,
but as I sit in my reason-
ably wrinkle free blouse
while doing ZOOM session
after ZOOM session, I am
rather comfortable in my
running shorts and bare feet
4 unbeknownst to my cli-
ents. I just don9t care for my
slacks much anymore. But
thank you to all that is holy
that my (yes, I feel like it is
mine) local coffee drive-thru
is still open. Caffeine depri-
vation is not yet a first-world
dopamine sacrifice I am pre-
pared for.
Some of the lost <give
a darn9s= have been in fact
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liberating. Others more
consequential. For some,
COVID meant such a rapid
shift circumstantially and
neurochemically that the
unrest in the unknown has
been paralyzing. Traumatic.
Just the act of getting out of
bed may seem daunting.
In the initial days of the
COVID pandemic, dopa-
mine was intimately inter-
twined with the novelty, the
stress, the innovation that
followed. Altruism flour-
ished, people mobilized, we
prepared. As the dust has
settled to reveal what seems
to be a long road ahead, the
sprint that epitomized the
early days has slowed to
tenuous march. As is many
times the case, the feeling of
motivation in itself is flee-
ing. It takes discipline and
intentionality despite hard-
ship to persevere. And some-
times that means asking for
help.
Our society and popular
culture jumps in bed with
dopamine every chance it
gets. Who gets pushed out of
the bed? Serotonin.
While dopamine has
been termed our <reward=
chemical, serotonin has been
dubbed our <contentment=
chemical. And guess what?
It doesn9t take much to real-
ize that in our culture, con-
tentment is simply not sexy.
Our brains and bod-
ies become so primed for
dopamine and stress that
serotonin receptors central
to mood and anxiety eventu-
ally become less responsive.
Furthermore, as we flood our
brains with dopamine, our
cellular receptors dopamine
attaches to become a bit
overwhelmed by it all and
start to downregulate. This
is the biology of tolerance.
In an attempt to compensate,
we try to up the ante: more
adrenaline, more distraction,
more drugs, more sugar, just
more. And all the while, we
become less content and
often, more depressed.
Robert Ludwig, the
author of <The Hacking
of the American Mind:
The Science Behind the
Corporate Takeover of Our
Bodies and Brains= says it
well:
<The road to hell is paved
with good intentions. The
same factors that increase
dopamine (technology, lack
of sleep, drugs, and bad diet)
also decrease serotonin.
Furthermore, stress drives
dopamine release and also
decreases the serotonin-1a
receptor reducing serotonin
signaling. Addiction results
from dopamine recep-
tor down-regulation cou-
pled with excessive stress.
Depression results from
reduced serotonin transmis-
sion from the same precipi-
tating factors, also coupled
with excess stress.=
COVID has taken away
much of what we were look-
ing forward to, much of our
perceived motivation 4 but
in the absence of so-called
excitement, it is an also an
opportunity to reevaluate,
to slow down, and to sim-
plify. Passion, excitement,
and drive are central to the
human experience, but must
be balanced with times of
stillness, contemplation,
gratitude, and thoughtful-
ness. Many of us have for-
gotten, or perhaps have
never been taught, how to
be still. How to be without
noise. How to feel without a
ready escape.
These are uncertain
times, but then again, life
is never certain. Accept
change, accept the chance
to evolve. On the other side
of grief is transformation
and perhaps, as we mourn
our dopamine, serotonin and
the contentment it brings
may become just a bit more
alluring.
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