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Wednesday, August 24, 2016 The Nugget Newspaper, Sisters, Oregon
Commentary...
of a certain age…
By Sue Stafford
Columnist
“No man (or woman) is
an island; entire of itself.”
— John Donne
When I was in high
school, I sang in the a cap-
pella choir. I remember
one song in particular that
always touched my heart.
When one of my favorite
pop singing groups, The
Lettermen, made a recording
of it, I played that 45 record
over and over.
As I considered what I
would write for this column,
that song came back to me.
I still remember every word,
and even the alto harmony I
sang.
“No man is an island.
No man stands alone.
Each man’s joy is joy to
me.
Each man’s grief is my
own.
We need one another….”
That sentiment certainly
rang true for me over the
last several weeks. Being a
single woman, living on my
own for many years, I have
always prided myself on
my independence and self-
sufficiency. But occasion-
ally life throws any of us a
curve ball and that American
individualism crumbles,
revealing that, indeed, none
of us is an island and we do
not, nor do I really want to,
stand alone.
Nothing brings that mes-
sage home more clearly
than an unexpected medi-
cal emergency like the one
I experienced several weeks
ago. It took a few hours for
me to believe the pain I was
experiencing was not going
to get better. Vanquishing the
thought that it would prob-
ably turn out to be nothing
(and how embarrassing that
would be), I called 911 and
in less than five minutes, the
Sisters-Camp Sherman med-
ics were in my living room
— coming sans lights and
sirens as requested.
I was no longer alone and
frightened. Their profession-
alism and, yes, their human-
ity served to comfort and
reassure me.
A trip to the emergency
room that Thursday night,
with a return home early the
next morning by cab, was
followed by another visit
with the medics on Saturday
morning, with more acute
symptoms. But this time
I had a friend with me
when they arrived. She had
instantly responded to a 7:30
a.m. Saturday morning call.
I wasn’t alone. She followed
the ambulance to the hospi-
tal and stayed with me in my
ER cubicle until they finally
admitted me to the hospital
early that afternoon.
For the next four days, I
had doctors, nurses, CNAs,
and food service people car-
ing for me. Sure, that’s their
job, but most performed
their duties, like the medics,
with professionalism and
humanity.
The phone calls, texts,
emails, and Facebook posts
from concerned and support-
ive friends and family both
amazed and humbled me.
My sons’ genuine concern
and offers to come to Sisters
were especially heartwarm-
ing. One of them cut his two-
week motorcycle trip short
and came for a few days —
under the guise of something
else — and cleaned my roof
and gutters, mowed and fer-
tilized my lawn, and replaced
my burned-out brake light.
His actions spoke volumes.
Another friend took care
of my cats and filled my
refrigerator with comfort
food. Someone else baked
bread and made home-
made soup. When I sat on
my glasses and popped out
one of the lenses, a friend
took them to get fixed. My
brother brought me home
from the hospital and picked
up a prescription. The list
goes on.
No, I am most certainly
not an island. If I ever
needed a reminder of that
fact, this latest adventure
certainly confirmed it. And
I now really believe what I
have always told others. I
am being a good friend, not
a burden, when I allow oth-
ers to help and care for me.
Because I have been tak-
ing care of myself for so
long, it is difficult for me
to ask for help. In trying
to figure out why that is, I
come up with not wanting to
appear needy or weak (my
ego talking), not wanting to
impose on others’ time and
space (not worthy), and per-
haps closest to the truth, not
wanting to have to admit to
myself that I do in fact need
to rely on others (humility).
So here I sit, humbled and
thankfully admitting that I
need you, my friends and
family and strangers. Thank
you for caring and not being
rebuffed by my protesta-
tions regarding needing your
offers of help and words of
concern.
Jammin’
for Nepal
in Sisters
this
Thursday
Folks in Sisters can come
out and enjoy local music
while supporting a home-
grown Sisters nonprofit that
changes lives for the better in
Nepal.
Hood Avenue Art will host
“Jammin’ For Nepal,” an
“empty cups” musical benefit
for Ten Friends on Thursday,
August 25, at 5:30 p.m.,
featuring local musicians in
support of the Sisters-based
nonprofit, which assists the
people of Nepal.
Buy a cup donated by
local potters and fill it with
free beer, soft drinks, and
distilled beverages. Snacks
and appetizers will be
available.
Bands to play are: Doug
and Katie Cavanaugh,
Brad Tisdel, Jim Cornelius
and Mike Biggers, Bubba
Clement and Margaret
Wo o d a n d T h e L o v e
Puppies.