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Wednesday, January 27, 2016 The Nugget Newspaper, Sisters, Oregon
Life with a
Willing
Heart
Jayson Berray
Columnist
The ballad
of the grocery
store dad
Some people think they
handle stress well. Reality
usually tells them other-
wise. You know what I’m
talking about, right? Every
once in a while you come
across that one person who
claims nothing stresses him
or her out and you think,
“Give me a break. You
must not have children.”
Case in point:
The other day I went on
a solo trip to the grocery
store with my children.
We needed groceries and
I needed to get the chil-
dren out of the house, both
for their benefit and their
parents’. So we saddled
up “The Batmobile,” as
we call our black Honda
minivan, and headed for
the sprawling metropo-
lis of Redmond, because
“Redmond is always less
busy.”
We landed at the market
and, just my luck, it was
about as crowded as Costco
on a Saturday afternoon.
One child was pushing
a little-person cart with a
long pole on it that had a
white flag at the top which
said, “Customer in train-
ing,” and the other child
was continuously failing
to sit on her bottom in the
grownup cart while she
attempted to grab anything
she could reach, saying,
“Look at this, Daddy!”
Meanwhile, being the little
farm enthusiast that he is,
the one pushing the little-
person cart kept touch-
ing all of the produce and
placing it in his cart while I
wasn’t looking.
Right off the bat the
stress level is high.
Not too long into our
visit, the one pushing
the little-person cart got
bumped into by another
child and he immediately
became quite sad. It wasn’t
too long after this point that
dear old dad’s aging body
said, “Threat level mid-
night. Get to a bathroom
calmly and quickly.”
Great.
Do you know what it’s
like to have a panel of chil-
dren observe you in the
handicapped stall while,
well… Honestly, the look
of worry on their faces
almost made me question
if I was having a bigger
problem than I realized.
Even the YouTube video I
had going on my phone in
an attempt to distract them
wasn’t enough.
Something deep in my
soul knew it wouldn’t be
the last disaster of the trip.
We had more things
on our list and after the,
“Daddy, can I have a
doughnut” requests were
past, we finally made it to
the checkout line. The child
who had been pushing the
little-person cart was try-
ing his best to help load the
groceries onto the conveyer
belt and he stacked a few
cartons of berries we had
picked out. Unbeknownst
to me, as I was unloading
my own cart, the one on
top didn’t quite arrive in a
secure position.
Sure enough, that last
disaster struck and the
said carton of berries hit
the floor. Viewing it as an
opportunity instead of a
disaster, the child who had
been pushing the little-per-
son cart dove to the floor
and began scooping the
blueberries into his mouth
like a drug addict whose
last bag of goods fell out
of his pocket as he’s being
dragged into the police
station.
We held up the line of
people behind us as an
employee cleaned up the
mess. As I finished load-
ing the grocery bags into
our carts the clerk sympa-
thetically looked at me and
asked, “Do you need some
help out?” As patiently as
I could, I said, “No, we’re
fine, thanks.”
We made it to The
Batmobile and lit out of
there like robbers escaping
the scene of their crime.
You see, I am one of
those people who gets
stressed out pretty easily.
But oddly enough, there
have been several points in
my life where, despite the
chaos which would nor-
mally incite panic, I have
been able to step up and
make it through the situa-
tion. And as insignificant
as a trip to the grocery store
might sound, it was one of
those moments. It helped
me realize that despite the
everyday craziness of life I
was happy to be alive and
out with my kids. As we
drove home I couldn’t help
but reflect on these events
and laugh.
That being said, I’m
never leaving my house
again.
The Nugget Newspaper Crossword
By Jacqueline E. Mathews, Tribune News Service
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