THE SUNDAY OREGOXIAX, PORTLAND, FEBRUARY 16, 1903.
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PORTLAND, SVM1AY. FEB. 16. 1908.
THE WORTHLESS AEDK2CH BILL.
The AUlrlch currency bill ought to
be rejected. Better nothing at all.
It simply proposes to increase the vol
ume of the same kind of notes we
have bond-secured notes, which are
sure to be congested or cornered, and
to cause other panics. In an emer
gency there is no movement of this
kind of currency. It piles up; it Is
hoarded; it aggravates the very diffi
culties it creates. It becomes an im
movable mass. It is secure, because
it is founded on bonds, and in times of
stress It goes into hiding places, to
wait till the trouble blows over. Not
so with a bank currency based on
bills that represent staple commodi
ties, moving in the world's markets.
Such currency must keep moving. But
it in absolutely secure.
To increase the present volume of
currency would mean merely conges
tion of it again, as heretofore, in the
great financial centers of the East,
leaving the West and South in straits,
as heretofore. But a rational cur
rency, founded on securities that rep
resent leading marketable commodi
ties, would be dispersed throughout
tho country where the commodities
are grown and the banking is done.
The redemption of the notes would be
absolutely curtain; it would follow or
attend the payment of the commercial
paper deposited as security. There
would be, besides, a gold reserve, to
assure the integrity of all transactions.
A commercial bank cannot carry
fixed securities, except in a small way.,
Its securities should be of the mova
ble kind good commercial paper,
surest securities of all. Thus, and
only thus, will it be possible to avoid
theso periodical currency famines a
cause and consequence of our panics,
the like of which are not seen in other
commercial countries, because they
avoid the conditions that produce
them.
JOINT-RATE VICTORY.
The decision of Judge Hariford, in
the Joint wheat rate case, will occa
sion but little surprise among those
who have taken the trouble to exam
ine into the merits of the suit. The
: manifest injustice of compelling the
Portland road, which had displayed
I sufficient enterprise to build into the
i wheat belt, to turn the cream of its
traffic over to a competing road which
; had not built' into.' the territory the
j Puget Sound milling trust sough't to
invade was so great that but few took
! the trouble to examine the lppnl ctasna
' of the matter. The .decision was
based on the specific requirements of
the Washington constitution, which
demand that the Legislature pass
laws establishing reasonable maxi
' mum rates, and .that any attempt to
shift the ratemaking power to a com
mission or other body not provided
for by law was clearly in violation of
the constitution. This feature of the
case was, of course, sufficient to jus
tify the court in ruling against the
f Railroud Commission in its attempt to
usurp the powers of the Legislature,
but there was an even higher princi
ple of right and Justice involved,
which, if properly understood by the
people and the courts, would alone
have, been sufficient to condemn the
joint wheat rate. Had the court de
cided in favor of the Railroad Com
mission and ordered in the joint rate,
the result would have been the de
struction of the milling business
throughout the territory affected. It
would be a financial impossibility for
many of these mills to buy a year's
supply of wheat early In the season,
with the' possibilities of a falling mar
ket bankrupting them before the
year's supply was ground into flour.
With the joint rate in force, the Puget
Sound millers could make such in
roads on their available supplies, be
fore buying a single bushel in the pro
tected Puget Sound territory, that the
O. R. & N. miller would be obliged to
close his mill very early in the season.
The growers In O. R. & N. territory
would gain nothing by this early spurt,
and those in Puget Sound territory
would be heavy losers, for, after se-
curing stocks in O. R. & X. territory,
the milling; trust, which was demand
ng the joint-rate order, would have i
the growers In Puget Sound territory
at their mercy. It was unfair to the
railroads, for it would have forced the
O. R. & N., with a 300-mile line which
It had built at great expense, from
Portland Into the disputed territory,
to take a ten or twonty-mile haul to
a junction point, on the traffic its own
enterprise had developed, and turn
the long: haul to the coast over to a
competing; line. Viewed from any
standpoint, the joint-rate order was
so monstrously unfair that it is a won
der that the Washington Railroad
Commission had the audacity to at
tempt to enforce it.
WE SHALE ALL BE FREE.
There will be no need to vote for any
Republican nominee lor the legislature who
pledges to Statement No. 1. Any Democratic
nominee will do as well. Oregonian.
The policy the above Journal is pur
suing, together with the help of the old
party "bosses' of the Republican party,
will go a long way toward giving this
state a Democratic government; not
necessary a government' by those who
cfill themselves Democrats, but by those
who prefer the rule of the common peo
ple rather than the yoke of political dic
tators. Albany Kvcning Herald.
"Very well, then. Let us have the
yoke of no political dictators but the
yoke of Democratic dictators. Let
us have no Republican of any author
ity, or pre-eminence, or leadership.
He would be "a boss." The men sup
porting him would be "a machine."
Again, let us have no political dic
tators but Democratic political dicta
tors. The Oregonian has been called
a dictator. It quits. By all means,
brethren, allow no Republican dicta
tors, but follow the Bourne-U'Ren-Bryan-Populistic-Socialistic
dictator
ship. You will have a happy journey,
doubtless. But there are some other
Republicans.
CKORKK MEREOITH.
George Meredith, who stands in un
auestioned pre-eminence at the head
of English letters, was born February
12, 1S28. He was, therefore, SO years
old last AVednesday, and the comple
tion of his fourth decade of life was
celebrated throughout the English
speaking world. George Meredith
has never been a popular writer and
never will be. for the reason that his
books cannot be read without intense
application of the mindv The major
ity of people who read do not care to
apply their minds; their purpose is to
avoid thqught. They turn to a book
for lack of something more inane. It
is a last resort, a forlorn hope, to
which .they betake themselves only
when there is nobody to play cards
with or when it is not convenient to
assist at a vaudeville show. Meredith
wrote both prose ana poetry. In verse
his lyric power has been not unjustly
compared with Victor Hugo's, but
here as in his hovels, he is not read,
because he cannot b understood
without hard mental work.
Meredith, has been called obscure,
like Browning, but the epithet, while
it is just enough in the latter case,
does not belong to him. . His style is
not involved. He does not set him
self down willfully to spin out in
volved word puzzles for the be
wildered reader to unravel if he can.
Browning did this, but Meredith nev
er. As a rule he prefers short sen
tences nd his style Is not only direct,
but it is clear as crystal. The diffi
culty in understanding Meredith arises
not at all from any lack on his part
of the power of expression, but from
the nature of his thought. He thinks
things which are hard to understand;
it naturally results that his readers
cannot expect to have an easy task in
following him. Persons approaching
Meredith's fiction for the first time are
apt to confuse his elusive narrative
with obscurity of style. He seldom
tells a straight story, coming out with
the ' brutal facts. He makes you
aware of them by hints, suggestions
and a subtle game of consequences.
If one ever gets at his meaning it is
by the exercise of acrobatic mental
agility, hut the difficulty does not lie
in the style. Meredith knows Engrlish
as Roosevelt knows politics, and ho
plays with the English sentence as
the President does with the American
electorate; but there is a difference.
Meredith plays sportively, with aloof
ness and little apparent concern for
the outcome, while the President Is in
deadly earnest.
Meredith is in earnest, too, thougTi
he does not let the reader see it. He
is always fencing and he loves to
make one believe that it is a jest, but
it never is. His numerous novels deal
with big problems. They are psycho
logical and sociological, like all mod
ern literature that amounts to any
thing, and they face deep questions
without shrinking. There is hardly
one of Meredith's novels that' would
not feel shockingly out of place in our
simpering, splnsterish, American liter
ature; not one which is not "unfit for
family reading." The reason is that
they treat serious questions and we
have established a convention in this
country that nothing serious has any
right to a place in religion, science or
art. They must all -deal with plati
tudinous folly or we call them wicked.
"Lord Ormont and His Aminta" is as
good as any of Meredith's novels to
look at for a moment or two, to see
what his books are like. It Is a novel
which deals with the same problem
as Ibsen in the "Doll's House." An
attractive young woman married to a
commonplace man is called upon to
suiter from his tyrannical selfishness.
She endures it for' a while and would
very likely endure it forever but for
circumstances which awaken her ana
lytical powers and set her questioning
the right and wrong of the case. Fi
nally, like Thorold Helmer in the
"Doll's House," Lord Ormont com
mits an act of flagrant cowardice. His
cowardice is purely social, while Hel
mer's has an economic basis, but both
come to the same thing and both
bring the outraged wife to final judg
ment with her husband. Ibsen's Nora
in the "Doll's House" tells Helmer in
terse, positive terms exactly what she
thinks of him, and then departs with
her baggage to live in her old home. J
Meredith's Aminta does a great deal
worse. She leaves Lord Ormont and
goes to live in Switzerland with an at
tractive young man. Of coarse she Is
not married to him. To make mat
ters as bad as possible, the young man
is head of a school In Switzerland,
and it comes about finally that Lord
Ormont . sends his nephew . to the
school, although he knows who it is
that conducts it. Could wickedness
go farther? It is but a poor sop to
morality that Meredith kills Ormont
in the end and Jets Aminta and her
pedagogue get married.
One may fancy from this glimpse
of the sort of tiling Meredith does in
his novels that there is another reason of the diseases that the Alaskan In
besides the difficulty of his literary I ulans bear about In their bodies are
workmanship for their unpopularity.
It is bad enough to bo forced to think ; more actively virulent, naving ausu
while one is reading; but it is worse ! lute control of these - creatures, the
to be forced to defend one's conven-
tlonal beliefs at every corner; and
since most of us care more for our
conventional beliefs than we do for
the truth, we naturally shun books
where they are assailed. Owen "Win
ter somewhere in the Virginian com
mits the indiscretion of writing a sen
tence or two which the reader must
exorcise his mind to undersland. He
makes the proper apology and we for
give him for once, though a -second
offense would be a different matter, of
course. But George Meredith not
only makes us think continually, but
he also throws mud at all our beloved
fetiches, and he never so much as
hints at an apology for either crime.
Who can blame us for not reading his
boojis?
THE URN OF THE TIDE.
Industrial activity is manifestly re
turning throughout the country, and
within a few months may be expected
to be quite normal again. It will not,
indeed, be what it was before the October-November
panic; for then it
was and long had been feverish, ab
normal, excessive," and the break was
a consequence of overproduction in
the larger sense, and of the specula
tion and abuse of- credit that always
attends efforts of this description. The
prosperity of which such boast was
made, during a long period before the
panic, was not. wholly a normal con
dition. Much of it was mere "profli
gacy, the reckless expenditure of
wealth ob'tained by "floating" all sorts
of schemes, under the auspices of
I frroa t InriiistriMl nnrl other trusts Tlml
wllI not be resumed soon, nor the like
of It; yet industry and trade, on rea
sonable bases, will be resumed, bring
ing surer, if less spectacular pros
perity. The country at large has suffered
little. Indeed hardly at all. The stress
has been felt only in the financial and
industrial centers. But It is practi
cally over. Every day brings reports
of resumption of operations at indus
trial establishments ' in numerous
places. Some of these are stirring
again almost to their full capacity.
Others are resuming gradually, and
industry in general will soon be alive
again. Tet, the wild effort and reck
less energy that was pushing in all
directions, regardless of risk, will not
be renewed, because mere plungers
will not be able soon to get at money
again. And it is well.
One evil, not easily cured, comes
from the .prodigality of the past five
or six years. It is the enormous in
crease of public expenditure and the
habit of extravagance in all depart
ments of government that have been
established with it. The. worst' fea
ture of it all is that the people have
formed the habit of expecting too
much to be done at once, in support
of public undertakings. Again, the or
ganization and support of official life
cost the people too much. There are
too many officials for the work to be
done. and the expenditure in and about
many of the departments is unneces
sarily large. The public mind has got
into the habit of thinking that "free"
things, though requiring thousands
and even millions of dollars, practi
cally cost nothing. Yet all that comes
from the public treasury must be sup
plied by individual human effort, in
one way or another. Economy, of
course. Is not mere parsimony. But
It requires care, prudence, hesitation
and selection in expenditure, and
avoidance of hasty and ill-considered
schemes. Every community should
take care not to load itself up too
far with bonded debt; for it is pay
ment of heavy sums, in the. form of
Interest, that helps to create the cap
italistic monopolies, of whose oppres
sions the people complain. Every
great municipal work, for free use of
the public, multiplies, through inter
est, the original cost many times over.
This is not to say that all such un
dertakings should be refused. But it
should teach the deliberation that will
count all the cost on the one hand,
and enforce caution in the estimate
of benefits on the other. In such cal
culation there is equal likelihood of
underestimating on the one side and
of overestimating on the other; for a
whole community may overdo itself,
as an Individual may.
Portland now is talking of further
very great public expenditures, to is
sue bonds for the money. It presents
a condition that demands most care
ful consideration. Where, for exam
ple, is the high bridge to connect the
Peninsula with the central part of the
City to be placed? How much will it
cost? When is it to be built? Many
things are to be settled before the city
should commit Itself irrevocably to
such a work. Admit, .indeed, that we
want it. Shall we begin it now, or
soon? . Or wait yet awhile?
' INDIAN DISEASES IX ALASKA.
Judge Gunnison, of the ' United
States Court at Juneau," Alaska, sounds
a note of warning in regard to sani
tary conditions in our far Northwest
ern territory that it will be wise for
the proper authorities to heed. The
Indians of Alaska have become so
thoroughly infected with the vices of
civilization and so permeated with the
diseases incident thereto that they
represent a race, perishing pitifully
and revoltingly, from the earth. They
go about at will, scattering the seeds
of disease, not only among their own
people, but to a greater or less extent
among the whites a menace, accord-
ing to Judge Gunnison, to all with
whom they come in contact. Mission
ary effort, though pushed with self
denying zeal among these Indians for
many years, has been, to ail appear
ance, wholly wasted, since they are
in far worse condition, physically and
morally, fhan when they were practi
cally the sole possessors and inhabi
tants of the Alaska peninsula.
The commercial touch of civiliza
tion has been to them the vilest of
which it is possible to conceive. As a
result many of them are suffering
from contagious diseases, the germs
of which they disseminate as they
wander about like the vagrants that
they are, and that their treatment by
the whites compels them to be. In
this stress Judge Gunnison urges Fed
eral legislation that will empower the
territorial authorities to enforce sani
tary regulations among these In
dians, including the quarantine of
those afflicted with contagious dis
eases. The appeal is one that should be
acted upon favorably and promptly.
The Hawaiian Islands would long ago
have been depopulated but for the
j quarantine of lepers. At least some
as loathsome as leprosy, and are even
Government should exercise Its power
in the matter, even to the extent of
gathering them together in a colony
and maintaining them in close quar
antine. BENEFITS OF EIME-SVLPHCR, ,
During the month of February you
can tell an honest fruitgrower by the
smell if he hasn't the odor of the
lime-sulphur spray about him, he
isn't giving the fruit Industry a square
deal. This is a test that will never
fail. When you meet a fruitgrower
this month, stand for a moment on
the lee side of him. and if you don't
get a whiff of. sulphur perfume, ask
him "Why is a San Jose scale?" And
don't be offended if the suggestion of
brimstone he verv strone. . Don't tell
your friend that. he smells like Hades.
The fact of the matter is that the true
character of .sulphurous odors depends
chiefly upon the frame of mind' of the
smeller. If you can enjoy good fruit
if you are a friend of the fruit industry,-
the fumes of sulphur during
the month of February will be as
sw.eet incense to your olfactory nerves.
Only an uncultured, rude and ignorant
person would assert that lime-sulphur
spray stinks. The untrained sense of
smell is no more capable of passing
judgment upon the odor of sulphur
than is the untrained ear fitted to
form an opinion of the merits of
grand opera, or the inexperienced
taste qualified to declare the virtues
of different brands of whisky.
To appreciate the fragrance of
the lime-sulphur spray, one must not
only possess a cultivated sense of
smell, but must have a regenerated
heart, for, indeed, the use of - spray
has its religious aspects. To the mind
filled with the true spirit of repent
ance, the dissemination of sulphurous
odors in February of each year is a
religious duty only a little less sacred
than the scattering of incense in the
temple of Zerubbabel on the day of
atonement. Through ignorance or
willful neglect, the farmers of Wil
lamette Valley have been sinning
against the laws of righteous fruit
growing. The use of lime-sulphur
spray is a manifestation of conver
sion and true repentance, with conse
quent regeneration
Moreover, the smell of -sulphur Is
not only a pleasant one to the cult
ured nose but. we have no doubt, it
is also a healthful smell. Dr. Woods
Hutchinson has not yet written an ar
ticle on the medicinal value of fumes
from Winter spray, but when he shall
do so, there can be no question that
his opinion will be unqualifiedly In
favor of the spray. We all remember
what an indispensable remedy sulphur
and molasses was in our childhood
days, and, since there has been great
progress in medical science in half a
century, it is a safe prediction that
modern authorities on the practice of
medicine will vouch for the potency of
sulphur in every form. It need oc
casion no surprise whatever, if Dr.
Hutchinson proclaims that consump
tives who engage In spraying' fruit
trees experience immediate recovery.
Certainly the germs of typhoid, ma
laria, diphtheria and meningitis will
not live if subjected to the fumes that
pervade all well-managed apple or
chards at this season of the year. If
a little effort were made it is prob
able that several hundred testimonials
could be secured certifying that go
ing bareheaded while engaging in
spraying means sure death to the
dandruff microbe, and therefore ef
fective cure of baldness. Why not?
When we were boys sulphur was the
recognized remedy for the itch. It is
a reasonable deduction that use of
lime-sulphur spray will prove to be a
good cure for itch for office.
WASTED; SELF-HELPFUL NEWCOMERS.
Oregon desires, and needs for the
development of its vast natural re
sources, a large addition to its popu
lation. This is a legitimate demand,
which is confined strictly to men who
have a purpose in life men with
families preferred, industrous and
willing to lay hold upon opportunity.
An unlimited number of men of the
agricultural class, for example, with
definite purpose; who have been
trained in the ways of industry and
economy, and who have small means
to inveat in land and simple equip
ment for working it could find place
in Oregon with promise of plenty
after a few years. This promise
would give place to. abundance and
that in turn to competency. Mild
climate, a productive soil and a con
stantly widening market are the sure
ties that nature and conditions have
placed upon this investment.
Such additions to our population
are' very much desired andwe look
to the Spring colonizations on trans
continental railway lines for a gener
ous supply of this class of new citi
zens. Our commercial bodies are pre
pared to yelcome -and assist by all
means in tfleir. power all who come
hither with Intelligent purpose and a
desire to better their conditions in
life. ,
But of men of the purposeless class,
w-ho have simply drifted here with
the current of restlessness which has
borne them about and about all their
lives; men who have somehow
imbibed the idea that this Is the
moneyless man's paradise, wherein
they can make their own terms with
the employing force and thereby set
tle themselves in soft jobs with such
f accompaniments -as short hours and
extravagant pay-
oi an sucn as tnese
Portland has quite enough. Our over
supply of this class at present (as in
dicated by almost daily appeals for
aid for the unemployed and destitute)
comes mainly from other cities of the
Pacific Coast that have beeij in the
booming business, looking to num
bers without regard to desirability in
the effort to increase their population.
Men who have been disappointed in
not finding what they sought and
what the boomers of other cities
promised them, have drifted here in
not inconsiderable numbers.
It must be said, however, that all
of the unemployed In this city at pres
ent are not of this class. Many, in
deed, wait only the coming of Spring
and the revival of out-door industries
to get to work. For all such there
will be work to do. In the meantime
the necessities of life press and temp
orary employment for an army of fn
dustrious, willing men is sought. Were
this month November ' instead of
February, the situation would be most
distressing; as it is, it is extremely
perplexing to those who have been
constituted caretakers of the destitute
in the city. Taxpayers, "an always
dependable quantity," are called upon
to come forward to help these men
to help themselves. The response,
naturally enough, will not be joyous
and eager, but it will be without
doubt sufficiently substantial to meet
exigences of the case. In the meantime
let the word go out that Oregon needs
population of the industrious class and
that for such as these, there is ample
room, . abounding opportunity and
cordial welcome.
LIMBER TRADE PARALYZED.
Statisticians who a year or two ago
were putting out figures which
showed that in" the very near future
this country would be living in a
treeless age will now have an oppor
tunity to revise their figures. The con
dition of the lumber trade throughout
the United States quite clearly in
dicates that production has out-distanced
immediate consumption to
such an extent that there are more
idle sawmills in the United States than
ever before in the history of the busi
ness. In the Pacific Northwest, the
slackening In the business was at first
charged to the advance in railroad
rates, but since the dullness began to
appear in this portion of the country
It ha3 become even more apparent in
other parts of the United States.
In Minnesota and Michigan, where
the sawmill -business was nearing its
end on account of the supply of raw
material being practically exhausted,
the lack of demand for lumber has
been fully as noticeable as on the
Pacific Coast. It now appears that
neither of these districts has been as,
hard hit as the South. A report Is
sued by Secretary E. A. Walker of the
Mississippi Pine Association for the
month of January, shows that of 81
mills reporting, the average of oper
ation during that month was but five
days, and the .total production but
8.931,385 feet. Various causes are as
signed for this sudden shift in the
trade, from wonderful prosperity . to
almost complete stagnation, but the
pre-eminent and overshadowing fac
tor in the decline in business is, of
courSe, the recent financial stringency
which called a halt on a vast amount
of new construction work throughout
the country.
Cor factories alone were using im
mense quantities of lumber in turning
out new. rolling stock for every road
between the Atlantic - and the
Pacific, . and the universal pros
perity of the farmers was re
flected in new barns and residences
which, in the aggregate, called for an
immense amount of lumber. Out on
the Pacific Coast, there was a big
demand from San Francisco to repair
the damage wrought by the earth
quake, and to meet the requirements
of the building boom In Southern
California cities. The Orient was also
buying considerable stock to rebuild
burned bridges and repair other dam
age resulting from the war, and down
in Central and South' America there
was considerable railroad work which
required large quantities of ties. Prac
tically all of this demand has ceased
and with lumber freights to California
ports about $5 per thousand less than
they were a year ago, the movement
is on a very restricted scale.
The demand for Oregon fir from
the Orient has fallen off and ties for
the Central American and South
American railroads are coming across
from the Orient at prices much lower
than any which Pacific Coast mills
care to quote. The stagnation of
course has its effect on. all branches
of trade, but it will not be permanent.
It will help keep our wonderful" for
ests green a little longer, but in the
end they must go. Barns, fences and
houses must be repaired and rebuilt,
and new ones take the place of the
old. Cars, bridges and other lines of
railroad work must be renewed, and
the timber supply is steadily .getting
smaller. For that reason there is a
strong probability that when the buy
ing tide again sets in, it will flood
stronger than ever, and it is a cer
tainty that there will come at no dis
tant date, a revival in the business,
and the Pacific Northwest having the
best supplies of raw material, will
handle a larger lumber traffic than
ever before.
BACK TO TICF FARM.
Agriculture, in some of its phases,
appeals to the young man of brain
and muscle in a way at once attractive
and full of promise of health, with
plenty all along the way and a more
than probable competency by the time
he reaches middle life. The era in
which the boy, disgusted with what
was called "farming," hastened to
leave the farm as soon as he was old
enough, and engage for a living in
anything that offered about town, has
passed, or is rapidly 'passing, in many
of the states that have become pros
perous through agriculture. For this
change and the wholesome spirit that
it has wrought, the National Depart
ment of Agriculture, working through
agricultural experiments and schools,
is largely responsible. Under the old
regime the farmer's boy was thought
to be sufficiently educated if he had
spent three months of the year in the
district school between the ages of 8
and 14 years; under the present re
gime the farmer's boy, If he is to be
come a farmer, needs and gets special
training in the State Agricultural Col
lege. Passing thence, after a course
of four years, he is able to overcome
handicaps of soil and climate, to
make profitable dairying, fruitgrow
ing, stockraising, sheep husbandry,
grain farming, or whatever branch of
"growing things" in which he special
izes, with its by-products. Moreover,
he is able to enjoy and does enjoy his
work, not infrequently becoming an
enthusiast in a certain line, and an
authority widely quoted among men
of the same vocation.
Our state Is somewhat slow in this
line, of development as compared with
Wisconsin, for example, where dairy
ing has made a marvelous advance
in the last decade, or Iowa, that fur
nishes, by means of its enormous corn
crop, more than one-half the hogs
that are received at the Chicago
stockyards. Both of these states
have . excellent agricultural colleges,
and the work of these Is vigorously
supplemented by "farmers' short
courses," farmers' institutes, etc.
The Oregon Agricultural College is
doing a work that will be widely felt
in the next decade a work that has.
Indeed, already been evident in the
advance made in horticulture, dairy
ing, the rotation of crops, etc., that
for "many years, and up to the past
few years, relatively speaking, were
left to the haphazard methods of the
former era.
Experimental work along these and
other lines is made extremely Interest
ing to students, and the results are
very gratifying. It is said that about
80 per cent of the students of the
Iowa Agricultural College go back to
the farms after graduation not to
sink themselves In the soil that they
may wring a bare living from it, as
did their ancestors there and else
where, but to rise above it through
knowing how to make it pay tribute
to intelligent, enlightened endeavor.
The more we have of this "return to
the farm" by young men and young
women educated in our agricultural
colleges the better for the state and
the Nation. So gracious is the cli
mate, so generous the soil, .of Oregon,
fhat only intelligent effort properly
spplled is necessary to make our cul
tivated fields redouble their abun
dance and turn thousands of acres of
waste places into pastures and mead
ows.
We want more people of the farm
ing class; we want more farmers'
sbns to take the agricultural course in
the State College at Corvallls, and
more farmers' boys to stick to the
farm, except when they leave It for
instruction in their vocation, and more
graduates to return to the farm not
necessarily the old farm, but to farm
ing, in order that Oregon may take
her place among the agricultural
states of the great Northwest
The practical Joke is senseless and
utterly indefensible, and the perpetra
tor is commonly a nuisance to his
friends. At best such an- attempt
tp be funny Inflicts anxiety and morti
fication upon its victim and gives
pleasure of a questionable type to Its
perpetrator. It has been known to
produce fright that has led to mental
and physical ills life-long In their
effects, and to cause grief that has
found refuge in self-murder. Oc
casionally, as In the sad occurrence
that took place in a suburb of this
city Wednesday evening, it has re
suited in the death of the perpetrator.
In this case it must be admitted that
the man who attempted to play the
hold-up joke on his friend, a young
policeman, did not deserve the death
which was his portion. His offense
was not serious enough for that. He,
however, took his life in his hands
and lost It. No one can blame a man
for shooting a self-announced bandit
or for not being able, in the dark to
see that a friend was trying to play
a joke on him. While the death of a
worthy citizen is a matter of regret,
and the more so when, as in this In
stance, yhe left a wife and large
family, the young officer who
answered with his gun, when called
upon to throw up his hands in a
lonely place, cannot be blamed for
the promptness of his response, nor
for its deadly effect. He would have
been a laughing-stock to his fel
low officers, had the hold-up been
genuine, as he had every rea
son to believe that it was, and had
he surrendered his purse without
resistance. Truly the Joke h on
the joker In this case and It is a
grim one Indeed. Public sympathy in
the case is divided between the young
man who unwittingly shot and killed
his friend and the family so suddenly
bereft of its head.
The loss of the Emily Reed oft the
Oregon coast early Friday morning
was due to a miscalculation on the
part of the navigator. The' disaster
is particularly sad, as the sorely beset
vessel, after having battled with the
storms of the Pacific Ocean -for more
than three months, was within a few
hours of its destination with all well
on board. The Emily Reed was
nearly thirty years old and was one of
the few survivors of the old wooden
vessels that were launched from the
Maine shipyards in the heyday of
their activity. The captain makes no
rdystery of or excuse for the loss of
the ship and eleven of Its crew. He
states plainly and simply that he had
made a mistake in his reckoning and
ran his vessel too close In shore.
Among other reasons why The Ore
gonian objects to Statement No. 1 is
this: It .is unwilling to delegate the
authority, or to give to any Republi
can member of the Legislature, in
structions to vote in its behalf for a
Democratic United States Senator.
When it desires the election of a Dem
ocratic United States Senator it will
"go it straight" for that purpose, on
its own account, using the regular and
Constitutional method not making
such a fool of itself as to pretend or
suppose that party can be abolished.
It is an insult to a Republican mem
ber of the- Legislature to try to make
him vote for a Democratic Senator,
and to a Democratic member to try to
make him vote for a Republican
Senator. '
Thq old era of. the horsepower
streetcar is recalled by an order of the
superintendent of the New York City
Railway Company, prompted no doubt
by the Humane Society, that streetcar
horses must be supplied with blankets
in zero weather. This leads to the
suggestion that the order be extended
to include the shivering passengers of
the slow and frigid cars. While the
humane spirit prevails why not im
prove the occasion to the benefit of all
concerned beast and human by dis
continuing the use of horsepower en
tirely in moving streetcars?
Grandpa Gassaway Davis doesn't go
off by himself, and shun the haunts
of men, and peak and pine, because
Miss Ashford Jilted him. He is old'
and tough, and has left all that far
behind him.
On the authority of the ..Merchant
Tailors' National Exchange, it is bad
form to wear cuffs at the ends of
trousers. This is not . the final word;
Mr. Bryan has not yet been heard on
the subject.
One man sighs for a Republican
leader. Another man declares that
any Republican leader will be "a
bos3." Brethren, we. surely are "up
against it."
After March 1, if not sooner, we
look for Portland to be on the right
side of. the percentage column in the
clearing-house table.
While Portland is setting out roses
next Saturday, maybe some one will
think to plant a cherry tree just for
auld lang syne.
Now that It has narrowed down to
Taft and Hughes, the country Is safe
for four years from March 4, 1909.
However, everybody who is insulted
should not try to "lick" the conduc
tor. ,
GRAVEYARD VERSE
On a Bachelor.
At tlirecs.-ore Winters' end I died,
A cheerless being, sole and sad,
The nuptial knot I never tied.
And wish my father never had.
A Dutchman's Epitaph on 11 la Tnria
BnhM.
Here lies two babes, dead es two nits.
Who shook to death mit sguey nts.
Thcv was too good to live mit me.
So God he took 'cm to live mit lie.
A Soutb CaroMim Tribute to Departed
Worth.
Here lies the boddy of Robert Gordin,
Mouth almighty and toath ackordln,
Stranger tread lightly over this wonuer.
If he opens his mouth, you are gone oy
thunder.
From LlanflHntnythyl Chiirrhrarrt,
Wnlra.
Under this stone lies Meredith MorTHtl,
Who blew the bellows of our cliurcn-
organ ;
Tobacco lie hated, to smoke most
unwilling.
Yet never ro pleased as when pipes he
was filling;
No reflection on him for rude speech
could be cast.
Though he made our old organ give
many a blast.
No puffer was he, though a capital
blower,
He could fill double G, and now lies a
note lower.
Hoireir Kpltnph on fhnrlra I.
So fell the royal oak by a wild crew
Of mongrel shrubs, that underneath
him grew;
So fell the lion by a par k of curs:
So the rose withered 'twixt a knot of
burs;
So fell the eagle by a swarm of gnats:
So the whale perished by a slioal of
sprats!
Humplirej- Cole.
Here lies the body of good Humphrey
Cole:
Though blac k his name, yet spotless- is
his soul:
But yet not black, though Carbo Is the
name.
Thy chalk is scarcely whiter than his
fame.
A priest of priests, inferior was to
none,
Took heaven by storm when here- his
race wu.3 run.
Thus ends the record of this pious man:
Go and do likewise, reader, if you can.
On a ToinbMtone tu fw Jerary.
Reader, pass tin! don't waste your
time
On bad biography and bitter rhyme:
For -hnt I am, this crumbling clay,
Insures.
And what I was. is no affair of your!
From a ;rartone In Enex, Kntcland.
Here lies the man Richard,
And Mary It is wife.
Whose surname was I'rltihard:
They lived without strife:
And the roson was plain.
Thev abounded in riches.
They had no care nor pain.
And his wife wore the breeches.
Kroin Thetffortl Chtireh yard.
My grandfather was hurled here.
My cousin Jane, and two uncles dear;;
My father perished wltli inflammation
in the thighs.
And my sister dropped down dear! In
the Minorles:
But the reason why I'm here, interred,
according to my thinking.
Is owing to my good living and hitrd
drinking.
If, therefore, good Christians, yfu wish
to live long.
Don't drink to- much wine, brandy, pin,
or anything strong.
In a Cuurelijard In Aberdeen, Scotland.
Here lies I. Martin Klinrod;
Have mercy on my soul, gude God.
As I would have on tliine gin I were
God.
And thou wert Martin F.lmrod.
In (hlldfvnll I'arluli, Kuslond.
Here lies me, and my three daughters.
Brought here by using Chletenham
waters.
If we had stuck to Epsom salts
We wouldn't be in tliese here vaults.
In Moretoa Cliurruyartl.
Here lies the bones of Roper Norton.
Whose sudden deulh ws oddly
brought on:
Trying one dny bis corns to mow off.
The razor slipt and cut his toe off!
The toe or, rather, what it grew to
An inflammation quickly flew to;
The part then took to mortifying.
Which was the cause of Roger's dying.
Byron's Inncrlptlon on the Monument of
Ilia Dor.
Near this spot
Are deposited the remains of one
Who possessed beauty without vanity.
Strength without insolence,
Courage without ferocity.
And all the virtues of mart without'
His vices.
This praise, which would be
Unmeaning flattery
If Inscribed over human ashes.
Is but a just tribute to the memory of
Boatswain, a dog.
Who was born a Newfoundland,
May. ISO!;.
And died at Newstcad Abbey,
November 1. 1808.
MICH IN LITTI.K.
Coleridge says that Noah's ArK
affords a .fine Image of the worlJ at
large, as containing a very few men,
and a great number of beasts.
The boxes which govern the world
are the cartridge-box, the ballot-box,
the jury-box, and the band-box.
There are certain things upon which
even a wise man must be content to
be ignorant. "I cannot fiddle," raid
Themlstoeles, "but 1 can take, a eity."
Sire Tnomas Overbury said of a man
who boasted of his ancestry, that he
was like a potato the best thing be
longing to him was under the ground.
"Go and see Carlini" (the famous
Neapolitan comedian), said a physician
to a patient, who came to consult him
upon habitual depression of spirits. "I
am .Carlini," said the man.
In the works of Prof. Thomas Cooper
It is said. Mankind pay best, 1. Those
who destroy them, heroes and warriors.
2. Those who cheat thorn, statesmen,
priests and quacks. 3. Those- who
amuse them, ns singers, actors, dancers
and novel writers. But least of all,
those who speak the truth, and instruct
them.
An illustration of false emphasis Is
supplied by the verse, (I. Kings xiii,
27,) "And lie spoke to his sons, saying.
Saddle me the ass." And they saddled
him.
When Mr. Pitt's enemies objected to
George III that he was too young, his
Majesty answered: "That Is an ob
jection the force of which will be
weakened every day he lives."
The clock that stands still, points
right twice in the four-and-twenly-houi-s;
while others may keep going
continually, and be continually going
wrong.
The Mexicans say to their new-born
offspring, "Child, thou art come into
the world to suffer. Endure, and hold
thy peace."