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About The Sunday Oregonian. (Portland, Ore.) 1881-current | View Entire Issue (Aug. 27, 1905)
THE, &XJNDA-Y OREGOy-IAy.- 3?QRJLyi;- AfcgUSTU ggftyttioSS li'I 6 1 Entered at the Postoffico at Portland. Or., ' as second-class matter. SUBSCRIPTION RATES. INVARIABLY IN ADVANCE. (By Mall or Express.) 'Jailr and Sunday, per rear Dally and Sunday, sir months 'o.oa Ual y ana Sunday, three monins Dally without Sunday, per year "-j0 J xjallv and stinrinv. nir montn .o Dally without Sunday, six montns . Dally without Sunday, three months... 1.03 Dally without Sunday, per month...... .jj Sunday, per year .0 Sunday, dx months Sunday, three months 05 BY CARRIER. Daily without Sunday, per week - .1 Dally, per week. Sunday Included....... 0 THE WEEKLT OREQONIAN. (Issued Ever' Thursday.) Weekly, per year - - L$0 "Weekly, six months - - Weekly, three months - -50 HOW TO REMIT Send postofflce money order, express order or personal check on your local bank. Stamps, coin or currency fire at the sender's risk. EASTERN BUSINESS OFFICE. The 6. 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(hnaha Barttalow Bros., 1012 Farnam: Mageath Stationery Co.. 1308 Farnam; 240 South 14th. Sacramento, Cal. Sacramento News Co 420 X street. Salt Lake Salt Lake News Co.. 77 West Second street South; National News Agency. Yellowstone Park, Wyo. Canyon Hotel. Lake Hotel. Yellowstone Park Assn. Lone Beach B. E. Amos. San Francisco J. K. Cooper & Co., 740 Market street; Goldsmith Bros.. 230 Sutter and Hotel St. Francis News Stand; L. E. Lee. Palace Hotel News Stand: F. W. Pitts, 100S Market; Frank Scott. SO Ellis; N. Wheatley Movable News Stand, corner Mar ket and Kearney streets; Foster & Orear, Ferry News Stand. St. Louis. Mo. E. T. Jett Book & News Company. 800 Olive street. Washington. D. C Ebbltt House. Pennsyl vania avenue. PORTLAND, SUNDAY. AUGUST 27, 1005. IS HISTORY A SCIENCE? The psalmist said in his haste, "All men are liars." The experienced exami ner of witnesses in court confirms the cynicism of the sacred singer, not in his haste, but after serious reflection. That no two men who have seen the same object or event will describe it without contradicting each other is a commonplace remark among lawyers. Not that they mean always to lie, al though even.tb.at extreme case is by no means rare, but what one really and fuly seey feels and hears is never i"-kat- really happens, but what he hopes or dreads may happen; or, if the observer is quite dispassionate, never theless. the idiosyncrasies of his sense organs, with their multiplied defects and Illusions, will make ms report jar with the truth. Hume was right when he said it was a.ways more likely that the witness lied in a given case than that the chain of cause and effect had been broken, but liis remark was unnecessarily lacking In amenity; he might have made his point just as well had he put it that the balance of probability was always on the side of Illusion or self-deception. His blow at miracles would have been quite as telling; his disparagement of human nature less severe. It Is bad enough that we cannot tell the truth, let us not emphasize the unhappy cases i hen we Will not. The observers whom a skillful presti llgltator mystifies and delights would be obliged, if they trusted their sense, to assert that solid Iron rings could be passed through one another's sub stance, that objects could be annihilat ed and created at the magician's pleas ure, and that he could suspend the action of gravity or reverse it. But the Insistent teaching of science has so per meated the modern mind that we reso lutely distrust our senses, or most of us do, whenever their reports contra dict what we call the laws of Nature; though this common distrust is a very recent thing in history. Not so very long ago It was confined to minds rare and gifted, like Spinoza's or Bacon's, and It is far from universal now. Who has not half-believed in supernatural interventions between cause and effect at the seance of some Ingenious "me dium"? Bacon laid down many rules to guide the reason in its search for truth among the thronging mistakes of the senses and the false Inferences which we con tinually draw even from accurate ob servation. These false Inferences are more numerous than the actual mis reports of sight and hearing, and it Is while men are drawing them that pas sion strikes in to mislead and pervert. Science is based on doubt of sense reports and especially of the Inductions which the naive intelligence Is prone to draw from them. Nevertheless, the truth or falsehood of its great hypothe sis must be tested by precisely these reports and inductions; and just as lawyers extract the truth from an en tang'ement of contradictions by elimi yj -bating the irrelevant and the trivial un til they have reached a single clear. categorical statement which one side asserts and the other denies, so science will make the fate of a theory hang upon some unique and simple observa tion, like reading a scale, where error Is almost out of the question. The con elusions of astronomy, which deals with vast stretches of space and time and phenomena of tremendous grandeur, depend for the most part upon observed facts of the simplest kind. The new science of earthquakes, seismology, to which Japan has contributed so much. Illustrates the profound distrust of men seeking exact knowledge for what they see and hear. Its progress has con sisted almost entirely in the invention of Instruments to register phenomena automatically. The human factor, the personal equation, Is eliminated so far as it may be. But even in the exact sciences of ob servation, in physics and chemistry say, the human element remains to illude and Ivltlate apparent truth. In an the data of history, the human element predominates. The phenomena from which historical conclusions are drawn never have been and never can be reg istered by automatic instruments. The reports which -we have of them must always be those of human witnesses, unreliable at best, and in this case doubly so, partly because they are gen erally untrained observers, and partly on account of the infinitely complex phenomena which they attempt to de scribe. History, which deals, with phe nomena more varied and involved than any other branch of knowledge. Is the only one which is entirely destitute of instruments of exact record. Even -psychology has an advantage here over history. An attempt to an swer this might be made by citing coins, inscriptions and implements, which are in themselves. It is said, un impeachable witnesses to what they record. They prove their own existence. Beyond that they are neither better nor worse than other documents and sources of knowledge. Behind them is the motive, always dubious, which It is the aspiration and the despair of history to reveaf. For, to be a science, history must present a chain of cause and effect; not merely such a chain as might have been, but such as actually was. And this, in human affairs, is a chain of motives. "No nation and no Indi vidual," says Emil Reich, "knows the motives of his own conduct." How then is the historian to know those of diverse multitudes In distant times, es pecially when we remember that not only were they themselves Ignorant of what Impelled them to action but that. in many cases, they were at great pains to conceal what they imagine to be their reasons and purposes? He may know and report facts with more or less approximation to truth. The chain of causes which would unite those facts Into a science will generaly elude him. THE PARTY OF SIX. Judge Cameron was shocked! Well he might have been. The emotions of a. sedate spider whose web has en tangled a hornet were nothing to his when the police marched those six aris tocratic offenders into his court. His one desire, like the Irishman's who had caught the bull by the tail, was for somebody to help him let go. And who so ready to help let go of this com posite bull, a six-headed animal, in fact, as his worship the Mayor? Dr. Lane was elected on a platform of rig orous enforcement of the law; but what is the law between Democrats? - The law is made" for minnows, not whales. One shudders involuntarily at the rude Impudence of the police in dis turbing the recreation of this dis tinguished party of six. Gambling is a low vice, of course, when practised by a lumber jack In a saloon, but gambling by A. S. Bennett and his Democratic friends in a hotel parlor is a very different matter. Under such circumstances it may not be exactly a religious exercise, but certainly it savors of moral sublimity. It argues a frivolous mind in Mayor Lane to look upon this indiscretion of the police as a joke. "A good joke" Is -what His Honor styled this invasion of the sawed privacy of the six Democratic states men at their gambols. We take the matter more seriously. What is the country coming to when ruffianly de tectives dare to treat such men as Mr. Bennett and Mr. Matlock, caught law breaking, with the same ignominious rudeness as they would a common of fender? To be sure the wrong was partially repaired by the Instant discharge of the distinguished Innocents and the miraculous forrretfulness of their names, but this is not sufficient. Nor will it be sufficient merely to punish the detectives who made the arrest. We suggest that the city of Portland, In token of humiliation and penitence for this grave blunder of its officials, erect a six-headed statue of Mr. Ben nett and his Injured friends upon some appropriate spot in Sullivan's Gulch. THE PRESIDENT A PEACEMAKER. Among the cartoons of the day Is one that represents President Roosevelt sit ting in the seat of judgment, in the courtroom, sternly addressing the Jury (of the peace conference), who had come In to report that they had been un able to agree on a verdict. "Gentle men," said he, severely, "back to your Jury-room till you can agree!" In no part of his career has Theodore Roosevelt been a more interesting man than in his relations to this peace con ference, and In none so Important. He it was, alone, who brought It about; he alone prevented the dissolution of it,, a week ago, and every day since. The commissioners of the two nations came soon to a blank stop. They could not agree, and repeatedly have been on the point of final separation. To avert such consequence President Roosevelt has called them into conference- with him self, first the representatives of one of the belligerent nations and then .the other; and he has sent cable messages to the governments at SL Petersburg and Tokio, proposing to each side new features of conciliation and adjustment suggesting modification or abatement here and concession there. Thus, he has kept the peace confer ence In existence for an entire week or more. Refusing to believe that the two nations could not come to terms of peace, he has done one of the rarest things In the -history of diplomacy. Should peace be made at last It will have been effected through him. There still remains some reason to believe, or at least to hope, that agree ment may be reached. Continuance of the conference. Its prolongation after so many announcements, apparently decisive, that there could be no accom modation, leaves still some quantity of hope, if not of confidence. Japan's conditions undoubtedly have been heavy. Russia could scarcely be ex pected virtually to give up her Pacific empire and pay heavy Indemnity be sides. With Russia the indemnity is the sticking point. It hurts her pride. Already her Pacific empire Is as good as lost. Port Arthur and the Llaotang peninsula Japan has taken and will keep; after a series of the bloodiest battles of a century she occupied Muk den, the capital Sf Manchuria; she has taken Sakhalin, and Russia, powerless at sea, cannot retake It. If the war shall ,go on, Vladivostok also will be lost, and with It will go Russia's last hope of saving anything worth keeping on the Pacific Coast. Russia therefore should be, and doubt less Is, anxious to make peace now; but she revolts from the woid Indemnity or the thought of It. But so anxious is Japan to secure her safe future that she insists on making the most of her present advantages. Possibly she maj' be persuaded to forego the Indemnity sle has claimed. It remains appar ently the only hope of peace. ut was objected last year wbenj Eresldent Roosevelt was a 'candidate, that his delight was war. His record for peace may stand against this ac cusation. X NEW METHODIST HYMNAL. The new hymnal of the Methodist Episcopal Church North and South has made its appearance. It is a book of church ritual and church hymns combined, containing the Psalter and the order of public worship now en Joined by the great ecclesiastical bodies represented, including directions to the congregation on when- to kneel and when to stand, the recitation in con cert by the minister and the congre gation, the Apostles' Creed, etc., th whole prefaced by the authoritative voice of the church the bishops of the two branches of the great Methodist body. Truly, we may say In looking over the volume, there Is growth even In eccleslasticism an expansion of the Idea of God and His mercy, but withal a distinct departure from the sim plicity and spontaneity of -worship that was Introduced by the Wesleys and out of which, eschewing the formalities of ritualism, the Methodist Church sprang into existence more than a cen tury ago, with loud hallelujahs. The Oregonlan has a copy of the standard edition of the Methodist hymn book, published in 1S49 with the approval of five bishops of the Metho dist Church, the long familiar names of Bishop Waugh and James being among them. In the address of these bishops. Introducing this hymn book, we find the statement that some of the hymns which had long been In use In the Methodist Church were parted with reluctantly, coupled with unqualified approval of the revised copy as a greatly Improved collection. The church was congratulated on having been furnished with a hymn book which, from the number, variety and adaptation of Its hymns, would not re quire another revision for generations to come. That this was a short-sighted view Is shown by the -feet that In less than one generation (1S7S) another revision was required and made, and now, 2S years later, the controlling power of the church. In response to the demand of the great army enrolled under its name, has produced yet another re vision, which the bishops, thirty-six in number, commend and present as an admirable compilation of sacred lyrics, "trusting that for many long years It will prove a visible and potent bond of union among Methodists." The history of hymnody Is possessed of an interest all its own. It Is In a sense the history of religious develop ment and growth. It Is not possible here and now to do more than refer to It, briefly citing a few examples In proof of the change that It represents In re ligious thought and belief. From the Methodist hymn book Is sued In America in 1768 or 1770, to the hymnal that has just been issued. Is a long step whether we measure It by years or by change in Methodist meth ods, and in Methodist belief. This is merely to say that while the rest of the world has been moving, Methodism has not stood still, albeit each forward step has been taken with hesitancy lest by It eome tenet of the church, some re quirement of Its theology, be shaken. some rivet in Its creed be started This first Methodist hy-mn book, we are told, was made up wholly of the hymns and sacred poems of the Wes leys. Down to the version of 1849, nearly one-half the hymns that . Methodists were authorized to sing In connection with public worship were those of Charles Wesley. This hymn writer has but 17 per cent of the hymns of the latest version as against 27 per cent In the version of 1S7S. The editors of this last version, says the Pacific Christian Advocate, yielded to the broader spirit of the day, -by greatly enlarging the list of authors and dropping out 262 of the Wesley hymns, adding: In the new hymnal thin every-way whole some and. Indeed, Inevitable process hK been rightly carried still further by the dropping of 108 more of tb Wesley's hynms. ISC of Charles' and 129 of Johns', leaving, however. 121 of the former's and 10 of the 1atters still on the list, which is probably too many. That which will strike some persons as more remarkable than the gradual expurgation of Wesley's hymns Is the introduction of .some of those of Whit tler and Samuel Longfellow and Wil liam Cullen Bryant men whose re ligion was above all creed and whose belief in God barred out a belief In vicarious atonement. Whlttler's well known poem, "The Eternal Goodness." Is used In part, though care has been takep to expurgate the stanza begin ning: But still my human hands are weak To hold your iron creeds; I Again the- words ye bid me xpoak My heart within me plead. Nor do we find In this hymnal the following verse of the same poem: Who fathoms the eternal thought.? Who talks of scheme and plan? The Lord Is God; he needeth net The poor advice of man. Still, it is a good deal, as Judged by former standards of sacred songs set up by eccleslasticism. to find in the new Methodist hymnal the stanzas culled as admissible to the church and to find In an organ of Methodism the assurance that this and another hymn by the same author "are especially sure to be welcomed by great numbers." This new hymnal, as far as these In novations go, represents growth of the religious Idea, a breaking of the shell of the old eccleslasticism, a disposition to keep step with the advance of mod ern thought In matters spiritual, even while the return to ritualism shows that the great Methodist Church has left be hind It the simplicity, and spontaneity that characterized and made distinctive the religious expression of the Wes leys Its methods. In brief, that gave It name and place among the religious denominations of the world. In conclusion it is safe to say that no collection of sacred songs, prepared for public worship, ever again will contain a hymn proclaiming: Sinner, hell Is deep and yawnlnr. Quenchless fires are raging there. No, one beam of hope is dawning On those regions of despair. Like some vast volcanic crater Burning waves of lava swell Rage and toss and mourn and labor Such. oh. sinner, such -Is hell. Nor are we likely to find 'g&od Dr. Watts In any new hymnal a'ddresslng "sinners"' In this wise: Wilt thou deplsp eternal fate Led on by sin's delusive dreams? Madly attempt the Infernal fate And force thy passage to the flames? Nor yet will the agonized Inquiry of a terrified soul, duly wrought upon by i a theology that revolves around pic tures of this lurid type, exclaim: Ah, 'whither -shall I fly? I hear the thunder's roar; The ilair ' proclaims destruction nigh ; And Whgeanee at the door. tather let us believe In the light of past progress. In compiling hymns for public worship, that the gentle voices of Cowper, of Elizabeth Barrett Brown- ing. of Phebe and Alice Carey, of Ten nyson, of Whlltler, of Holmes, of Sam uel Longfellow, will Join with the more hopeful and Joyous notes of the Wes leys, of Dodderldge, of Watts.- of Mont gomery, of Crosby and of others of the grand company of old hymn writers, eliminating still further from our hymn books the gloomy, doleful expressions of a lurid theology, the supreme effort of which was directed toward arousing and playing upon the -fears of man. Ig noring the far greater power of love in developing his spiritual nature. TEACE COUNSELS AND TORPEDOBOATS. President Roosevelt works half the .day in trying to establish peace be tween Russia and Japan and the other half on experiments with a new sub marine torpedoboat a contrivance sup posed to be 'one of the most destructive of modern engines of war. But In this various activity he does not con tradict himself, for he believes that adequate preparation for war Is the best assurance of peace. This is com mon sense, and no paradox. Though the submarine torpedoboat has not been fully proved unless, per haps, by the Japanese in their recent naval battle, and they are very reticent always about such matters It probably has come to stay. As an adjunct of naval armament all nations are making provision for It. Even when floating on the surface, it presents almost no tar get, and with comparative security It can approach nearer an enemy than any other type of vessel. Contrivances are supplied which enable it to remain under water for a considerable time without danger to the,cre.w; though. like the whale, of course It must rise at intervals to "blow" at least. Its funnel must emerge. To give the boat right direction and cause It to keep its course are the main problems. The purpose is to bring the boat as near as practicable to the enemy before the tor pedo Is discharged, and to give the torpedo accuracy of aim.. These are very nice problems, even in smooth water; much more so In a heavy sea. It Is apparent that on the movements of the boat from which the torpedo Is sent everything depends. The officer In charge of the boat must rely on a device fitted as a periscope, "which Is at the top of a funnel or tube rising vertically from the hull, and which may be detected when It Is permitted to emerge from the element in which the boat itself is concealed. The haste with which observations must some times be made can hardly- fall to Im pair their value. Certain conditions of the weather, moreover, are likely to In terfere with the utility of the appara tus. An accumulation of particles of spray on the lenses might obscure the view sufficiently to preclude a satisfac tory aim." Till recently It was supposed that the mighty expense of war under modern conditions and the deadly nature of modern enginery would deter nations from challenging each other to war;- but there now seems no reason to be-'J lleve that such considerations will prove real deterrents. If war costs more than formerly," there are more resources 'for It, yet with all modern enginery at its command, there is no reason to believe that there" Is, or Is- likely to be, much more destruction of life than In former times. Again, it may s.eem less terrible when we observe that we kill and maim annually more men on our railroads in America alone than were lost on both sides In the two greatest battles of bur Civil War. INDIAN EDUCATION. The Pacific Coast Indian Teachers' I Institute .was in session in the parlor of the American Inn last. week. It does not take very close study of their work to convince the unprejudiced reader or listener that they are very much in earnest in the effort for which their names stand. The titles of their many addresses are quite sufficient for this purpose. That these workers have become practical by ex periment with the Indians and a study of their needs is also In evidence. The plea voiced by jllty, sentiment, and ignorance, the poetic refrain of which was "Lo the poor Indian" has given place to the voice of knowledge gained through experience in dealing with the Indian at close range. Listen ing to this, we hear practical words about what sort of education Is best suited to the development along in dustrial lines of Indian girls and boys. The problem of Indian education was at first and for many years based upon a theory of which the practical solu tion was difficult and in many of its phases Impossible. It was very soon discovered that the middle-aged Indian was a factor that had to be eliminated from the problem wholly, since by no possible means could he be made to stand for an equation In Industry. The aged Indian did not enter Into the problem at all, but was discarded. As for the rest, Nlndlan boys and girls. removed from the environment of ! t"55. Irresponsible, vagrant exist ence were found to respond encourag ingly to the effort made In their be half and the tedious solution of the problem began. 1 - That was years ago a third of a cen tury and more and teachers of In dians have been among us for a week reporting progress. Among the pa pers presented and discussed was one on "The Knowledge and Tenchlng or Most Worth to the Indian" and another on "How Can We Best Fit Our Indian Girls for Domestic Service?" Ponder ous questions, both of these and dif ficult to answer. The very asking of them, however, marks an advance In Indian education, or more properly speaking. In Indian training. The lat ter even suggests very faintly, it Is true the possible solution of the servant-girl question within a narrow limit. There Is evidence that Indian girls make neat and capable housekeepers when carefully trained in this line. If they can be Induced to accept domestic service and American housewives can be induced to take them Into their homes.In that capacity, the money that the government has spent and Is spend ing upon their education will find re turn In useful lives a"hd needed work ers. This is indeed practically the only avenue of usefulness that leads away from the girls' section of the Indian Industrial school. The Idea of sending girls who have learned lessons of neat ness, thrift and housewifely skill In four or six years residence at an In dian Industrial school, back to their homes on the Indian reservation or the Indians' land allotment. Is a revolting one; the Idea that these girls, taught in the ways of civilization, will be able on their return to renovate their homes. j Induce- their fathers to aume re3pon- slbllity and their mothers to- take' to new ways of dress, cleanliness and home industry, has been or well may be abandoned. Nature suggests what the outcome of this, experiment will be In the certainty with which she returns to her wild domain the field once cul tivated but abandoned by the farmer. The hope of the Indian girl, whether of Chemawa or Fort Shaw or any other place where effort 13 being made to train her In the slow ways of civiliza tion, lies in her preparation for domes- j tic service, her willingness to perform such service and the willingness of j housewives to find her a place In house- I hold economy. Those who have known the Indian at close range for half a century are not enthusiasts In Indian education as those are who have studied him at a distance. But it does not become rea soning. Intelligent men to- adhere blindly to the knowledge that they gained of Indian character in the strug gles of the border nor to distrust the effort still less the sincerity of men and women who have set themselves to the salvation of the Indian educational problem. Rather should we all recog nize the fact that while there has been growth In this country all along the line of human effort and development the Indian, insofar as he has been touched by the wand of civilization, has moved forward or backward, ac cording as the touch has been good or evil, and that In response to the money of the government and to the effort of some conscientious men and women who have engaged in the work, there are many Indians in the country who are now self-supporting, orderly and In a degree Industrious. SATISFACTORY SALMON SEASON. The most gratifying feature of the salmon season just ended Is the fact that in no previous season, since the In ception of the Industry has so. much money been paid out for raw fish. In the amount of money placed In circula tion In the state, the salmon industry Is outranked by wheat, hops, wool and lumber, but for disbursing large sums In a comparatively short time, the pre mier Industry of the lower Columbia Is well In the lead of most of the others. From the Incomplete figures now at hand, it is apparent that the value of the salmon pack, including the fish that were pickled, frozen and disposed of In the markets, will approximate 52, 500.000. - This Is a vast sum of money to be placed In circulation In a few months along the Lower Columbia River, and, large as it seems, It does not fully represent the purchasing power that has been created by the salmon Industry In a single season. The vast sums paid out for raw fish were turned loose by the recipients and found their way Into a hundred ave nues of trade and industry only in directly connected with the salmon business. The record of the season just closed Is a good one. both as to the amount that has been placed on the market and as to prices realized. It again demonstrates the value of artifi cial propagation, and Is sufficiently en couraging to warrant a further expan sion of the hatchery plan. The rtin of steelheads was larger than ever before, -"and while the quality was above the" average of preceding years, - the price paid was but 4 cents per pound, . while the royal chlnook was selling at 6 and 7 cents and never dropped below 5 cents per pound. This would seem" to substantiate the theory, not Infrequently advanced, that the hatcheries have been handling too many Inferior fish, and have not been .getting enough eggs from the Spring Chinook. The expense of converting -spawn into young salmon at the hatch eries is no greater for a chlnook than for a steelhead, and so long as the latter will command but little more than half the price that is paid for the chlnook. it Is obvious thnt a special effort should be made to " work the hatcheries up to the limit, with the best variety of fish. The steelhead seems to be a favorite for the freezing process, but until its variety becomes sufficiently scarce to advance prices to a par with the royal chlnook It de serves relatively less consideration at the hatcheries. It is stated that the pack was pulled up to Its very satisfactory proportions by a liberal and steady run of fish dur ing the last two weeks of the season. This is probably the result of the prac- bv lllecal fishlnj? In past years, the hatcheries being thus forced to depend on he later runs for spawn. It is pleasing to hear that the au thorities this season will make an ef fort to enforce the law instead of ig noring Its open violation, as was the case last year. With a strict observ ance of the closed season and Increased facilities for hatchery work, there Is no reason why the industry should not only maintain its present satisfactory proportions but also show gratifying increases from year to year. THE MAKING OF A riRATE. Captain Alex McEean seems to be en deavoring to live up to the reputation he has gained as a bold, bad "pirate." Out of the north comes, another story that he has just swooped down on the Prlboloff Islands and killed as many seal as he could handle with his schooner Carmenclta. This story Is in keeping with that which was printed a few weeks ago to the effect that he Carmenclta had violated the laws of the land so flagrantly that the govern ment had officially declared her a pirate craft. The career of Alexander McLean offers strong testimony to the fact that journalistic romance can make a highly sensational piratical hero out of very ordlnary material. When Alex McLean and "Brother Dan" came out of the wilds of Nova Scotia about twenty-five- years ago they were as mild a pair as ever sailed the salty seas. In those days the business of raiding a seal rookery was regarded as pos sessing the same degree of -legitimacy as that of stealing government land. For a few years the embryo pirates clubbed and skinned the seal, and clubbed and cursed the crew. In the dull prosaic manner In which the work Is conducted outside of novels and poems. At an Ill-guarded moment, back In the early "80s, It became necessary for Alex McLean to make a wild flight with his schooner to escape the clutches of a revenue cutter. Shots were exchanged between the two craft and when a few weeks later Alex McLean landed In San Francisco, he had become famous. His giant frame and long, drooping mus tache made him an Ideal character for a piratical, romance, and the newspaper men of the Bay City proceeded to work the theme to the limit. Thereafter it would have been Im possible for Alex McLean to have steered a bull team over a skid road In one of the logging camps run by his countrymen In the Oregon woods wlth- out' the Incident attracting attention in the newspapers. And Alex seemed to enjoy It. To prevent his fame from losing Its brightness, he endeavored to make good. A raid on the Siberian seal rookeries landed him In the stockade at Vladivostok. The fare was harsh and the-vodka was withheld, but Alex survived like a hero, and when he es caped, that mighty author, Rudyard Kipling, embalmed the story In his "Rhyme of the Sealers Three." Out of the mouth of Alex McLean the Jungle - book man brought the statement that "Never a law of God or man got north of fifty-three." By habeas corpus or some other hocus pocus method. Alex finally escaped from the Siberian dungeon and when he again struck the Barbary coast In "dear old Frisco," V there was a new swagger in his walk and a fiercer curl in the wonderful mus tache. But there must be a replenishing of the oil on which a light of this kind r J l. . . , t-i MIU ,c i.uu ions auer ii , I,, V v 7r . of his combat with the United States revenue cutter Mohican. Some of the elements of truth were lacking in the story, but Alex never corrected them. Bad enough was good enough for him, I and he reveled in the belief that he was In a fair way to crowd Captain Kid or Sir Henry Morgan for first place In the annals of piratical life on the ocean wave. But there was a lull In this storm of piratical romance, and life was becoming very dull and prosaic for the man with the fierce mustache until Jack. London wrote the Sea Wolf using McLean for a hero. On the appearance of this racy tale of the sea. It was again up to Alex Mc Lean to "make good" and he fitted out the Carmenclta and set call on the cruise, which, according to newspaper reports, promises to be fully as event ful as Its predecessors. Fame Is said to be fleeting, but In the case of this formerly mild-mannered pirate, from the land of the bluenoses. it Is appar ent that fame should get on her seven leagued boots If she has any Imme diate Intentions of distancing the pur suing pirate who has figured so long and strong In song and story. The policy of the present administra tion to rid the city of the "stool pig eons," who, by permission from the detectives, rob and prey at will. Is a commendable one. If criminals are to be given license to ply their unlawful calling, let that license come from some higher and more respectable and re sponsible authority than Joe Day or others of his stripe. If our brilliant de tectives are unable to detect crime and capture criminals without forming a partnership-with the men they should be hunting, It might be well to replace them with some of the stool pigeons, The detectives, by granting their class Immunity from arrest, pay tribute to their prowess, and In the night of re cent events In detective circles, it is not at all clear that the city would be any worse off with some of these yegg men on the payroll than with several persons who draw 5115- a month detec tlve salary. A plan is to be submitted to Congress by the War Department, next Winter for organization of a "National re serve," composed of discharged soldiers and members of the National Guard of the several states, to be paid at the rate of J3 a month nor. to be" drawn away from their civil duties, yet kept In touch throughout the year with the Department. In case of emergency these men could render service at once. The whole force might be 100,000 men, or more. It is doubtful, however, whether Congress will approve. It will be said we shall have no war, and the expense of this organization would be several millions a year. But we have had wars, and doubtless shall again; and the cost of this preparation might be nothing to the cost of unprepared ness. New York capitalists have subscribed 53.000,000 for the purpose of forming a new life Insurance company. The ex cellent financial showing made in the recent Equitable row ought to be pro ductive of a large number of new life insurance companies. As an "easy money" proposition, the use of other people's premiums for speculative pur- however, that the time-honored rule. which asserts that "there is a sucker born every minute," may- have under gone a change since the Equitable row placed the financial hide of Jimmy Hyde on the fence. Russian peasants in the Crimea have Just burled a priest alive In order to appease a sorcerer's spirit and break up a protracted drouth. Over in the Baltic region, other Russians are blow lng up officials with bombs. Under such circumstances it Us not surprising that the Czar is a little timid about making terms which might not be agreeable to his unruly populace. The "little father" seems to be rapidly ap proaching that point where, to use an Inelegant expression, - "he will be damned If he does and he'll be damned If he don't." New subfoci of gambling in Portland, in spite of all efforts to conceal the victims though eminent citizens are among those who are bitten are re vealed almost every- day. Usually it Is said that the. game Is only a' little j amusement at whist or solo; but science has learned to distinguish the various j mosquitoes from each other with ac- curacy practically Infallible. The French, working on excavation for the Panama Canal, removed 33,586. 332 cubic yards of material before we took the job. The estimated money value of this excavation, reported by our engineers, was 527,174.033. How- much excavation will yet be required . . . . cannot be esumatea. unairman ononis says, unui me ij-ye ui wiiii um uccji determined. The population of Clackamas County, as shown by the state census. Is 20,877. The gain is less than expected, since the population In 1900 was 19,658. Clat sop, which had 12,765 Ave yean ago, now has 16,045. The detectives might at least have al lowed Mr. Matlock to "fill" and play hls hand such a good hand, too. It's too bad to lose so big a jackpot when a fellow holds the cards. With Attorney-General Moody pull ing for Bean and Senator Fulton for McBride. no man is sure of an appoint ment these days until he gets It. , 0REG0N0Z0NL Hiram llayfleld's Views. t. Grass Valley. Or.. Aug. 2t, 1005. To Hoom It May Konsern: I have jess bin reading in the Grass Valley Gazoot that my pale young friend. Al Fonso, king of Spain, has bin kut outen his just rites -by the despottick act of the king of England, hoo has set his i foot clown on any marriage between Al and Miss Patrlca (I fergit her last name, but she's a princess). King Ed up and says that King Al shan't marrv any niece of his not if he sees Al a coming after her. . He arises to state that the bonny blue-blood of England Is tbo hifalutin to mix up with any played-out kid monarch across the British channel, that like an not will have to be sent to El Paso or Los Angeles to git rid of lung troubles or words to that effeck. It looks moughty hard for Al. What tcr tVio turns Trim- In TTtu fnllfo nil. art -. .... wt Qn malsins a match for. hlm wljn royal female that will keep the king brand from petering out. The hull Spanish race, from Madrid. Spain, to. New Madrid. Mo., air calling for a quocn from the housetops, and they won't take" no for an answer. They'd ruthcr hold one queen rite now than 2 kings. I don't know jess what to advise my pore young friend Al. I'd like moughty well to see him succeed In life and hand down to posterity a line of kings that can stand the hard work and sign ukases ten hours a day without having their family M. D. injeck dope Into them to keep them alive. If Al will aksept advice from his old but humble friend, hoo has raised 3 krops of alfalfy a year and 14 children, I'll make a suggestion. Jess let this run-down king go out and- elope with some girl with ordinary old human blood in her veins. Fergit this here Miss Patricia, Al. Her name gives her away. What you want In your family Is plebeian blood: you need to hitch up with some hefty kitchen mechanic, or a blue-eyed country Sir! with a milk-pall In her hand, or an all. round young female named Jane Marlar Smith or something similar, who can hammer the dough with her fists and build biscuits like your mother never used to make. What you need and your grate and glorious country needs. Al Fonso. Is a wife that has got back of her the blood of hull generations of farmors that could plow a ten-acre lot without topping for water. And the hull lay-out of European monarchs air In need of the same brand of new blood Injected Into their families. Some of these pleasant nights. Al. you Jess hand the Janitor of your castle about four-bits and git him to leave' a ladder handy, then when all tho rej-t of your folk3 have gone to bed you sneak out of your " palace window, hit the old Madrid pike for the open air, and offer your crown- and all your troubles to the fust fine-looking peasant girl you set eyes -on. It'll be a moughty poor ex change for her, but most any girl would marry a king If he'd git down on his knees and beg. When you git the girl'- consent, go rite off to a J. P. and have the knot tied ug. and th'en mosey back to your palace and live happy ever after. If you do. as I advise, about the second generation from now will make fair-to-mlddllng raw ma terial for kings, and the hull royal out fit of Eur.bpe will bo camping out around your grandson's moated castle, trying to make matrimonial alliances so that they can git Into their own families some-of the noble blood qf the great King Ar Fonso' and Quecrf Jane Mhrlar. Yores with congratulations ready, HIRAM HAYFIELD: (Ic-) P. S. Advice given, to kings while they walt. . - .. - The crew of the battleship Missouri has applied for permission to use a genu ine Missouri mule for a. mascot, mo Navy Department should give this appli cation serious consideration. In the event of war the mule could be of signal ser vice. Let the commander give the order- Clear for action" and all the crew could remain below to look after the guns while the mascot, turned loose on deck. could kick everything movable Into the sea and thus save time. Also, In time of peace, his bray could be used for a fog horn. One cannot help wondering why the dishes always get rattled during an earth quake shock. "What of the future of Theodore Roose velt?" asks the Pittsburg Dispatch. "He cannot be expected to sink into the ob livion that Is the common lot of our Presidents when their work for the-peoplo Is over. He would chafe In this In activity." The Dispatch Is not the only newspaper that seems to be worried over Mr. RooMvelfs career when he gets through being President. Why should we worry? The bears arc not all dead' yet. Are not the woods full of wildcats? Doth not the mquntaln lion prowl as of old? The price of ammunition Is about the same as It used to be. Monarchs arc getting to be mlghty common objects. One quite unknown to fame has Just visited England. They call him the Gaekwar of Baroda. He somewhat resembles the Ahkoond of Swat. The name of an Infant In London, who by a certain sect Is worshiped as the new Me3slah, Is Glory Smyth Piggott. His folks might have helped his prospects by adding an "e" to the Smyth. Roy Knabenshue, In New York, mad a trip in his airship, which got out of order and came down In Central Park. Then the park policeman came along and threatened to arrest the aeronaut right away and take him to the police station If he didn't move on. Verily, the way of the transgressor is hard, and a man must fly mighty high to be a hero to the fly cop. N. B. Knabenshue moved on. ROBERTUS LOVE. Locating the Sensitive Spot. Chicago Tribune. Th.ri is a. strong suspicion that while- Mr. Wu was In the country asking those i innncent nuentlons he learned the exact , irt,nt Sam's scnsim-e spot and tne best way. of getting at it. i To Our Guests. Frank Dempster Sherman. Envoys of mighty nation1-, met today In solemn session at the Portsmouth ba, Under the crimson stripe and silver star; Ours Is the welcome that a friend can say. Here peace abides, while still the bloody fray Makes havoc In Manchuria afar. Where for Mikado and for Russian Czar The sword and gun are hungry 'for their prey. We, too, have fousht to save our country's life. Mother and brother; we, too, know the cost In men and gold ere sounds of battle cease. .God Klve you wisdom now to end -the strife! t Let not the opportunity, be losti sage Peace!